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Does this story make you want to cum?

I wrote this story and wanted to know in a poll if this story is good enough for you to wank it. http://www.lpsg.org/fictitious-stori...es-fiance.html

is part of a discussion in the Fictitious Stories forum that includes topics on Make-believe stories and discussions about large penises.


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View Poll Results: does http://www.lpsg.org/fictitious-stories/30295-my-roomates-fiance.html make you wa
yes 37 50.00%
no 37 50.00%
Voters: 74. You may not vote on this poll

 
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Old 07-12-2006   #1 (permalink)
hungschlong is offline

Does this story make you want to cum?

I wrote this story and wanted to know in a poll if this story is good enough for you to wank it.

http://www.lpsg.org/fictitious-stori...es-fiance.html
hungschlong is offline  
Old 07-12-2006   #2 (permalink)
B_Spladle is offline
Banned


I voted no without having read it. Just fyi.


That is not a sheep. That is a ram!
B_Spladle is offline  
Old 08-07-2006   #3 (permalink)
Snakebyte is offline


voted no just because I don't get anything from stories


Snakebyte is offline  
Old 08-07-2006   #4 (permalink)
B_Spladle is offline
Banned


Man, I can't believe I missed this opportunity the first time around. What I should have said was, "No, it makes me want to kill you."

That is not a sheep. That is a ram!
B_Spladle is offline  
Old 08-07-2006   #5 (permalink)
hungschlong is offline


Quote:
Originally Posted by Spladle
Man, I can't believe I missed this opportunity the first time around. What I should have said was, "No, it makes me want to kill you."
A simple YES or No would do.

I tell it like it is.
hungschlong is offline  
Old 08-07-2006   #6 (permalink)
ManiacalMadMan is offline


Quote:
Originally Posted by hungschlong
I wrote this story and wanted to know in a poll if this story is good enough for you to wank it.

http://www.lpsg.org/fictitious-stori...es-fiance.html
I looked at her sitting there on the sofa.
Did you now?
My roomate was out for an hour getting some groceries to make her dinner for her birthday. They had been together for two years and were planning a wedding next spring.

As I occasionally glanced at her from the corner of my eye. I could not help but notice her face getting red. She was watching a movie on the television.

I got up from the table to see what was making her so excited. To my suprise she was watching a porno. I thought this was great as I now realized she had no idea I was there.

At this point I became confused...you were watching her watch a film...okay...but more confusion is to come...

"Interesting video choice Chloe." I said aloud. She quickly turned the video off and blushed.

"How long have you been there for?" she asked.
I decided to see where I could bring this.

"Long enough to know you're horney" I teased.

"No I'm not!" she replied with an almost guilty look on her face.

I looked to the right of the sofa and noticed her panties were on the floor.

"What are those then?" I asked while pointing to the tiny piece of fabic on the floor.

You just told us they are her undergarments...do you suffer from short term memory loss?

She got up and walked towards my roomates bedroom forgetting her delicates behind. Thinking that the innocent fun was over I picked them up off the floor and brought them to the room.

When I entered I couldn't see Chloe. Just then the door closed behind me and I felt a hand reach around and grab my dick.

"Ahhh, Chloe??? What are you doing?" I asked. "We can't do this, it's not right."

I turned around to see her petit frame naked, her mound glistening with juices.
I then caught the smell of her sweet nectar.

"I need you, I have never made love to anyone except Charles and I couldn't go on without alteast knowing what another mans cock feels like" She stated.

Shouldn't that be I can't go on instead of I couldn't go on?

Her smooth hands on my arms drew me closer as she began removing my shirt. She slid her hands down my stomach until she reached my pants. She knelt down and looked at the bulge in my pants.

"Lets see how big you are" She slowly slid my pasts down past my cock "Oh my god!" Her eyes lit up as she revealed my 8 1/2 inch tool.

"You have to be alteast twice as big as Charles."

About right, in the past I've seen Charles around the apartment naked, usually drunk, and he is only around 4 1/2 inches, his girth yet again only 1/2 to my fat 6 inches.

At this point the honorable thing to do would have been to admit that to be twice the size of Charles you would need a 9incher and also that you were sporting an erection whereas when you saw Charles he (hopefully) was not...

She paused for a minute not knowing what to do. To speed things up, as I knew I had little time to fuck her tight little hole. I laid her on the bed in 69'er position and sunk my now rock hard dick into her mouth. I stared at her perfectly pink cunt and went in for the taste, just as my tongue touched her clit she sprayed her nectar into my mouth while having the biggest orgasm I have even seen a woman endure. She rode the pleasure for what seemed to be 20 minutes of constant girations and atleast five more orgasms.

Good thing old Charlie is a slow shopper...
I had enough, I wanted my cock in her.

Which is it? You had enough or you wanted to dunk your winkie in her?
I spun her around and positioned my fat hammer at the opening to her now soaked hole. I couldn't get it in so I quickly laid down on the bed and pulled her on top of me. This new position worked as I saw myself dissappear into her hot pussy.

She again had another orgasm this time her muscles squeezing my shaft.
"I want your dick forever!" She screamed.


I laughed hysterically at this imagery...

I couldn't believe that this sweet innocent girl could get so horny.
You have established already that she is far from innocent...(coming on to you, watching porn...these are not the actions of an innocent)

I could feel the pressure building up in my balls and I informed her to get off me. "I want you to come inside me", "But what if you...." she cut me off. "I am on the needle, I want to feel your dick cum inside me, Charles never would. Please!"

I couldn't help but get more tunred on by her beggings. I laid her down on the bed and re-ented her. This time I could just squeeze into her slightyly stretch vagina. I began pounding her, the echo of my balls slapping her ass echoing the room.

Her face was red with desire as I spewed my massive load into her pussy. Her cunt immediatly rejected my goo as there was no room in her completely filled gap.

Well good for you!


She went limp as she rode out her last orgasm.

Killed her did you? How do you know it was her last orgasm? Maybe she had another with the mailman later on...

Just then we heard Charles pull in the driveway.
I pulled out of her and fast as I could.
We flipped the mattress over as fast as we could to hide the soaked area and then I ran to my room just seconds before he entered the front door.

Five minutes later I came out into the living room and found Cglow sitting on the Sofa.

Um...Who in name of all that matters here is Cglow?

"Where's Charles? I asked.

"He's tired and taking a nap" Chloe replied.

I looked into the room and found my roomate asleep on his bed where I just fucked his fiance. Ahh life was sweet, and when I turned around I realized that Chloe had a more risque session already planned.
Last edited by hungschlong : 07-11-2006 at 01:16 AM.
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I have to be honest, the story did nothing for me and there were various problems with it However as a first effort it shows some potential, just slow down and read through before you post your story so there isn't so much confusion...
ManiacalMadMan is offline  
Old 08-07-2006   #7 (permalink)
Hirsute is offline


To be perfectly honest I would never wank over a story. Quite a juvenile request.
Not apropos at all !!
Hirsute is offline  
Old 08-07-2006   #8 (permalink)
hungschlong is offline


Yeah, I didn't really think the request through.

I also do find that this story is dead. Maybe I'll actually take some time and write something new. I already made a pt2 which was ok, but i think this story really screwed things up. Oh and I am really bad a spelling and forgot to run the spellchecker. I know it's shit, but i didn't get paid to write it. LOL

I tell it like it is.
hungschlong is offline  
Old 08-08-2006   #9 (permalink)
Heather LouAnna is offline


Quote:
Originally Posted by ManiacalMadMan

Killed her did you?
hahahahahaha

*cocksnuggler*
Heather LouAnna is offline  

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