Originally Posted by BWC8888
Title says it all . I have a feeling that my wife want a bigger dick, she never actually said that but when we have sex especially doggy she tries to position herself so i go in as deep as i can. Btw i am 7x5.5 . i asked her if my dick is big enough for her and she said its fine but i have a feeling its just something she is telling me not to hurt my feelings . Is there a way to find out if she would prefer bigger?
I have studied image issues for years now.
One thing I found out to be true is to NEVER 'ask' someone a direct question about liking an attribute or not.
When it comes to matters of sex people just are not too trustworthy in their words alone. You have to look at their ACTIONS
& see if they match their words.
I understand why people worry when a mate says "It's fine".
That's a diplomatic answer. There's no excitement behind the word.
It's almost like saying "It'll do" "It's sufficient" "It meets the minimum requirements".
Because there is SUCH a LACK of knowledge on sexuality & that the sexologists really don't have many satisfying answers when it comes to sexual problems & confusions, people are constantly trying to figure out where they stand. The reason why is because they want to please their mate & don't want them to stray.
These worries are not trivial. They actually make a lot of sense regardless of how people pooh-pooh & downplay the concerns of the ones who worry.
Sexual satisfaction curtails straying/cheating.
And nobody wants to be cheated on if they can prevent it.
Now you could be misreading her actions when she backs into you. That's the sticky part about the lack of knowledge in sexuality. Behaviors CAN be mapped out & signs CAN be trackable. But nobody really has done the work to figure which is which.
It's sort of like having a car make weird sounds & you're in the dark about what it means because you're not a mechanic.
It could be minor. It could be major. But you just don't know.
The TRUTH is, BWC8888, that ALL women have a Range of Acceptable Penis Sizes
whether they know it consciously or not. Your women may have or may not have explored her range. She may realize or may not realize what her range is. You don't know what her range is & where you fit in the hierarchy. You are worried that you are either at the bottom of the hierarchy or not even in the hierarchy at all.
Your fears will be lessened if you get a genuine enthusiastic response from her when you have sex. You want MORE than "It's fine".
You will know this for sure if she comes over to you repeatedly over time enthralled over your penis.
You don't know what her sexual experiences were before you got together & this worries you.
•She may have had larger penises than yours before but had a bad experience with them because of pain. Women who get that experience tend to go for more medium-sized penises to prevent that situation.
•She may have had smaller penises than yours before & had bad experiences with them because of lack of feel. Women who get that experience tend to go look for increasingly larger penises until they find one they are comfortable with.
•She may have had smaller penises than yours before & had a good experience with them because of how the small penis hit her spots. Women who get that experience tend to be more comfortable with small sizes & may even dislike a medium-sized or large-sized one because of how the small one works in her vagina.
•She may have had larger penises than yours before & had a good experience with them because of the penis's feel & weight in her vagina. Women who get that experience tend to rule out anything smaller than large including medium-sized & small-sized in order to maintain those sensations.
Most likely she may have had a mix of various sizes & various experiences to those sizes: good, bad, & OK. She might have had 2 OK small experiences, 2 bad large experiences, 4 OK medium experiences, 2 good small experiences, 3 bad medium experiences, 3 bad small experiences, 3 good large experiences, 3 good medium experiences.
The experience she had may not be all due to pure size. It could be function or duration or hygiene or whatever. But all of this flavors her view on what she likes physically from a penis in sex. People may want to conflate emotional factors into this but you cannot dismiss the physical.
ALSO, there is the VISUAL
aspect as well. She may not have had physical contact with certain sizes but with the existence of the internet she can view pictures & movies of certain sizes & get ideas. This flavors her view too.
THEN there is the PEER
aspect to consider. Her friends may talk glowingly or disparagingly about certain sizes & she is influenced by her friends' experiences or at least accounts. She may have had her own internal view of what she likes & what she doesn't but her friends advertise or scandalize one size over another. She may be curious to see if what is advertised lives up to the hype. She may be inclined to automatically rule out what is scandalized even if it may have been beneficial. This flavors her view too.
AND there is the CULTURAL
aspect to think about. It's sort of like the peer aspect except these advertising & scandalizing message are broadcast into popular culture. Music, movies, TV, publication, turns of phrases, idioms, puns, jokes. When you're surrounded by a barrage of messages like this, it ALWAYS has some effect on you even if you resist. This flavors her view as well.
She is NOT going to readily share this with you.
People do not truly share all their internal sexual curiosities ESPECIALLY with their mate.
You can't know for sure why someone chooses to be around you.
It's not always love. Togetherness on paper doesn't mean togetherness in reality. And this is what is frightening about relationships. That's why people always ask these questions in forums. They want to prevent a bad outcome of straying. They want to know if the relationship is more than an on-paper one.
The straightforward way to find out what her range of sizes is is to introduce objects of various sizes/textures & see how she instinctually reacts to them. But that may open up a can of worms you're not ready to deal with. What if you ARE low on her range? And if you are how do you keep her from potentially one day having an affair if she decides to try another one?
I would suggest trying to bias the results in your favor by improving the experience she has with your medium-large penis. People are influenced by their experiences. If she has an EXCELLENT time with you, it may keep her from wondering as much about other sizes. You will HAVE that enthusiastic response you were seeking & this will reduce your worries.
Understand basic physics & know that the way YOU make her have that excellent experience will be different than how other sized penises make her have that excellent experience. It's all about the EXCLUSIVITY of the experience as well. You have to give her a sexual move or response that no one else has ever done or can do like you.
Everytime you worry about her possible curiosity of large penises put that energy into maximizing your penis's potential in the sex act. It'll keep the demons out of your head & you will find new ways to sexually please your wife.
Wasn't expecting an answer like this, were you?