I think this guy is a self loathing closet case who is totally into you but can't handle the fact that he is falling for another guy. He wants so have sex with you but can't bring himself to admit he is gay or bi because he comes from a conservative background, probably has some religious hangups, and a lot of internalized homophobia. This is why he talks negatively about homosexuals and is not comfortable around gay men.

Both of you dudes sound like you have an alcohol problem...or soon will if you get drunk as much as you say and you are so drunk that you don't rememeber shit that happened. That is a sure sign of an alcoholic.

Definately talk to him alone and see what he has to say. You might need to assure him that anything he shares with you will stay just between you and him.