Big Dicks and Other Attributes

Posted 12-30-2007 at 01:53 AM by Male Bonding etc
Updated 05-05-2008 at 08:35 PM by Male Bonding etc (Visual Aid)

Dicks can get my attention.

Big dicks, like flaccid ones that hang halfway to the knees, can overcome much of my reserve. A dick like that is just not that easy to be discreet about.
Then there's foreskin. If it covers the head, even when the dick is erect, and there's still some skin left to make a little nozzle, yeah, that's very cool.
And an upward curve... Man, that makes it look like a tool that is designed for good sex!

A dick doesn't have to have all three, or even any, of the above qualities to be a nice looking dick, but one with all three is almost guaranteed to have me lusting for a new friendship. It's almost as seductive to me as big jutting nipples.

Nipples on some guys can pretty much make me forget I'm mostly straight.

Nipples sticking out a quarter inch or so... poking through shirts and sweaters... my eyes lock on them!
Pencil eraser nipples, little cylindrical versions of dicks, but sticking out in public when dicks are still expected to be covered... very sexual, like a loophole in the indecent exposure laws that some guys can take advantage of.
Big areolae are nice, sometimes quite attractive, but just not quite as enticing if not combined with big nipples.

Oh yeah, great nipples can get me to overlook a lot of things that might otherwise be unattractive about a guy. The only thing that trumps them is great muscles.

Muscles on a guy are so, SO, hot they could almost make me forgive someone for cheating by using steroids.... almost!

Big ol' flaring lats are probably my favorites, doing an elegant serpentine "V" shape thing, accentuating wide shoulders and narrow waists.
Abs, especially well defined lower abs that attract eyes downward are a major draw.
Glutes, calves, pecs, biceps, and delts all follow closely and have their attractions...
Quads and leg bis can be fine looking, but can also too easily be overdone.
Traps and the neck are the last things I want to see huge... better to see them be defined, but not bulging.

An athlete or bodybuilder with great muscles poured into smooth, tan skin can almost convince me he's a fine, worthwhile person without uttering a word...

But that's the thing: even a great face thrown into the mix doesn't mean that the things seen on the surface truly reflect the character or worth of the person possessing any combination of or all of the above fine, lust inspiring, physical attributes... And when it comes down to it, I lose interest pretty quickly if the guy lacks manners, minimal conversational skills, or an ability to think beyond immediate gratification.

It can be likened to a hand in a poker game: some amount of factors that detract like drugs, body art, or crude behavior can be overcome by certain attractive physical characteristics, but the aces in the hand are the positive emotional, intellectual and spiritual characteristics.

So, guys can grab my attention with outstanding dicks, nipples and/or bodies, but if we're going to be friends or have some kind of lasting relationship, they've got to possess qualities like integrity, intelligence, and courage.

1.13.08
A fantasy I have at this point in my life (when I am still single... but getting seriously involved with a wonderful woman) is that some guy friend will be "ALL that" (both physically and spiritually beautiful) and we will be intimates.

Intimates physically, like guys who are comfortable hugging each other, who can hang out naked with each other, who work out at the gym and/or in the pool together, who might even catch a nap or night together without getting sexual.

Intimates spiritually, like best friends who are comfortable sharing thoughts honestly, who love each other platonically and care about what happens to each other.

Yeah, I know, it sounds like I want a guy spouse or partner without the sex... and that is not too far from how I feel. I do love getting blow jobs from guys; so, it's not like I'm afraid of sex with guys. Still, it doesn't seem to be in the cards for me to have the "whole package" with guys. I just have never fallen in love in that way with a guy.

So, I anticipate again being happily married, possibly with my current girl friend, but I would love to have one or two intensely close friendships with guys as well... as long as those relationships support or at least do not threaten my marriage.

3.26.08
Here's an example from the Hot or Not thread:
http://www.lpsg.org/attachments/25306d1206120444-hot-or-not-floater.jpg

The guy's dick is nice, maybe curved, but probably no bigger than mine, and probably circumcized. His nipples stick out a little, but they also are not that big a deal. It's his body that gets me thinking of things straight guys aren't supposed to be thinking about. If he also has the ability to generate interesting thoughts, speak with some clarity, project positive attitude, and have a good time without drugs and alcohol... jeez! I'm wanting a date.

God help me if I meet some guy who has all of that AND the dick AND the nipples!

Seriously, though, I'd probably seduce the fellow or let myself be seduced by him... and hope we could be lifelong friends once the lust subsided... because the lust WOULD subside eventually, and the things that I love about loving women WOULD eventually reassert themselves...

Hey, maybe he'd have a daughter who could marry my son and we could share beautiful grandchildren... Not just beautiful to look at, but children who've been raised in loving homes, taught to respect themselves and others, inspired to give of themselves so that their lives (and the lives of others who are touched by theirs) are happy, productive, meaningful.

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I agree

[FONT=Arial Narrow][SIZE=2][COLOR=black]But that's the thing: even a great face thrown into the mix doesn't mean that the things seen on the surface truly reflect the character or worth of the person possessing any combination of or all of the above fine, lust inspiring, physical attributes... And when it comes down to it, I lose interest pretty quickly if the guy lacks manners, minimal conversational skills, or an ability to think beyond immediate gratification. [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy]You and me both![/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Arial Narrow][SIZE=2][COLOR=black]It can be likened to a hand in a poker game: some amount of factors that detract like drugs, body art, or crude behavior can be overcome by certain attractive physical characteristics, but the aces in the hand are the positive emotional, intellectual and spiritual characteristics.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Arial Narrow][SIZE=2][COLOR=black]So, guys can grab my attention with outstanding dicks, nipples and/or bodies, but if we're going to be friends or have some kind of lasting relationship, they've got to possess qualities like integrity, intelligence, and courage. :smile: [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy]Great, it seems like you and I have the same taste in men,[SIZE=2] ([I]minus the nipple thing that is).[/I][/SIZE] Guess I will have to add you to the list of people I can't cruise for guys with. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Arial Narrow][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=navy]I like sucking and playing with mens nipples; but only if it gets a rise out of them. Otherwise it's a waste of time. :tongue:[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[COLOR=#000080][SIZE=3][FONT=Comic Sans MS]If only the men who possessed [COLOR=navy]qualities like integrity, intelligence, courage, good conversational skills, and an ability to think beyond immediate gratification were more readily available! That's what I want! If I were to dream of a man I would dream of someone like you have described. Alas, I honestly believe they are either in short supply, married, or 100% gay. :frown1: [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE][/COLOR]

[FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=#000080]I forgot to mention the great men who [I]used to fit the above criteria[/I] until they either dated or married a [I]psychobitchfromhell[/I] and she destroyed his ability to love and trust.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

Posted 12-30-2007 at 04:33 AM by B_Principessa B_Principessa is offline

Updated 12-30-2007 at 04:42 AM by B_Principessa (added a line)

Okay!

Posted 12-30-2007 at 06:15 AM by Whopper-lee

Thanks NJ and WL

NJQT, I'm glad we have such similar taste. For you, though, it is surely more frustrating because you want one for your consort. For me such a fellow being married just means that the lust has a good reason to be contained. We can be friends, and the sexual tension can usually be channeled into passion for that friendship. If the fellow is "100% gay," then I've got a chance that he'll be into me, I guess... but the strongly gay guys are usually not as attractive to me... and they often seem not to trust us bi guys... So, yeah, that can be frustrating.

I've met quite a few of my girlfriend's friends, and a couple of them have great looking husbands. So far I've only seen them clothed, but I notice things like the button-fly jeans, the defined biceps, the small waists and nice asses... and then I really appreciate their humor and warmth. It's like the state of being married allows them to be more interested in or interesting to other guys ... marriage provides a reason to refrain from being sexually promiscuous and frees us to be more open.

In my own case, I know that I sometimes have been very reserved with both men and women because I don't want them to think I am interested. Especially when someone is not attractive to me, but seems very attracted to me, I try to keep a distance or throw up roadblocks. However, when I was married, I could relax and even be mildly flirtatious because everyone knew, most paraticularly me, that I was safely, happily, monogomously married.

Posted 12-30-2007 at 08:32 AM by Male Bonding etc Male Bonding etc is offline

	Ah, all the reasons I enjoy being gay. Give me a muscular jock or bodybuilder and I will take good care of him. I will hug him and pet him and call him George.
	Posted 12-30-2007 at 09:42 AM by Kimahri

	Well, as I have expressed here and elsewhere more than once, Kimahri, my life would be so much less complicated if I could, like you, claim simply to be gay.
	Posted 12-30-2007 at 11:53 AM by Male Bonding etc

I look at the "Is there such a thing as too muscular?" thread, and I respond with "yes" and "no."

Yes, because the guys who get super built probably all use steroids to get that way and compromise their health and humanity to be something not that attainable naturally or while living a well rounded life.

No, because, no matter how grotesque and over-the-top the muscles get, they still stir a response in me. I might not want to spend MUCH time with an over built guy, but I'll confess to wanting to spend SOME time with him.

As a swimmer I can appreciate a lot about those of us who are built at the muscular end of "athletic" or "swimmer" and strive to remain in that class. A skinny guy still has much that can be appreciated... and, yeah, a fellow swimmer with big nipples, a nice bulge in the Speedos, and a body somewhere between skinny and "too muscular" is likely to find himself in conversation with me at some point... that is, unless he is projecting major "bad attitude" vibes...

The ones who can keep up a conversation get extra points!

Posted 01-04-2008 at 10:10 AM by Male Bonding etc Male Bonding etc is offline

Updated 01-06-2008 at 09:36 AM by Male Bonding etc

One word for this posting....GAY. Just be who you are dude and don't worry about what the world or everyone else thinks.

Posted 03-05-2008 at 07:18 PM by ncguy207

	Gay Yeah, I agree: that's the gay side of my nature coming out, and I have no problem with that, seriously... except that it isn't 100% of who I am.
	Posted 03-22-2008 at 07:46 AM by Male Bonding etc

	I so agree with the above but lets be real all those attributes are nice but at the end of the day even if you find someone with all those qualitys the faults will always overshadow you probly will find that person and maybe for that one minute before your about to cum in otherwords climax when it's all over you'll be kicking yourself.
	Posted 03-22-2008 at 08:55 PM by fingerlickingood

Yes, FLG, I think that's what I'm getting at with my latest addition to the blog (3.26.08): if I find myself having been weak enough to succumb to the lust, I will also probably find myself having chucked something important with my girlfriend for something momentary with another guy.

Our culture currently seems to be all too wrapped up in sacrificing huge long term benefits for indulgence in short term and superficial gratification. We can each work on keeping those long term benefits in focus and still living lives that are exemplary in that we are happy and fulfilled, sexually, sensually, socially, and spiritually.

Thanks for your thoughts.

Posted 03-26-2008 at 08:21 AM by Male Bonding etc Male Bonding etc is offline

I can relate a little to what you're saying when you said:

Intimates physically, like guys who are comfortable hugging each other, who can hang out naked with each other, who work out at the gym and/or in the pool together, who might even catch a nap or night together without getting sexual.

Intimates spiritually, like best friends who are comfortable sharing thoughts honestly, who love each other platonically and care about what happens to each other.

Yeah, I know, it sounds like I want a guy spouse or partner without the sex

I had an experience like the one that you described with a buddy of mine in uiniversity. Being a straight guy, it was really confusing to me that I was so incredibly attracted to my friend. I loved him (told him so) in an intense masculine way that was completely non-sexual. I couldn't understand why I felt this way with him because I had never felt that way about a male friend before. I think it was mutual (he told me so when he was drunk), but he had an incredibly controlling girlfriend who was very possessive. She even told him at one point that she was jealous of the friendship we had. He married her, and I knew that would be the end of our friendship. Unfortunately I was right. When we met we bonded instantly. We worked together and were studying at the same university together. We used to work out together, showered and saunaed together in the communal showers, slept together many times, partied and got drunk together, physically comforted each other by hugging and other forms of physical contact, but no sex. We backpacked around Europe together one summer where we became even closer. We shared our secrets that we never shared with anyone else and I even felt comfortable enough to cry in front of him when I told him about a very painful experience I had losing a cousin who I loved very much. I gave up on him about 2 years ago. After marrying this woman and having 2 children with her, he changed. He became very jealous, angry and resentful towards me - why I will never understand. The weird thing was that he became worse after I got married (8 years after he got married). I think he probably had feelings for me that he couldn't come to terms with. He wasn't as open about expressing how he felt as I was. Unfortunately, he's not the same guy that I had those intense feeling for in the past. The website above really helped me put into perspective the feelings that I had for him in the past and move on. I miss my old friend and think about him quite often, but I will not contact him again because he is not the same guy I used to care so deeply for. I don't think that I will ever feel that close to another guy again. I do wonder if he ever thinks about me and those few incredible years we spent together.

Posted 03-27-2008 at 08:30 PM by AG08 AG08 is offline

Updated 04-09-2008 at 08:19 PM by AG08

	Thanks, AGO8. Very interesting. I'll have to spend more time reading and thinking about it, but one thing stands out: there still seems to be a bias against guys who ARE gay. As long as I am asking people to tolerate/accept/understand why I can't/won't try to be "normal" why would I want to put down or otherwise dismiss others who are different from me?
	Posted 04-03-2008 at 01:48 AM by Male Bonding etc

Not Exactly Gay

I suppose some of the difficulty we have in finding, each of us, our own comfort zone with our orientation and our assertiveness regarding that orientation comes in the fact that so many people still treat anything that MIGHT be the least bit sexual in our interest in others of the same gender as indication we are 100% gay. Things just aren't 100% ANYthing very often.

The guy in my avatar and the guy in the above link both appeal to me because I aspire to look like they do... the all over tan, the absence of body art and scars, the definition... all things I want to show off when my own body is seen. Unfortunately, I can't get to the gym as often as I should, have an aversion to supplements and diet aids that might do permanent damage, like certain foods too much, and get too distracted by sites like this one... So, I admire their bodies as inspiration, but also in a sort of vicarious or envious lust that verges on sexual and sometimes manifests itself as desire.

I mean, I COULD manage my time better, work harder, and do some things I don't do now and probably look pretty close to what they look like... but it's a lot easier to admire them from a distance... and there's this niggling feeling like I just might be able to enjoy a body like that even if it wasn't my own... if I could convey the right degree of interest just when someone like that is experiencing exactly the right combination and degrees of horniness and male appreciation...

Thus, what starts with me wanting to get into superb shape transfers into me wanting to tarry with someone willing and able to tan more, work out more, supplement and diet more, and coincidentally flirt with guys more than I do.

Posted 04-08-2008 at 08:46 AM by Male Bonding etc Male Bonding etc is offline

Updated 04-08-2008 at 08:59 AM by Male Bonding etc

Male Bonding,
Just want to tell you how much I appreciate your taking time to explain and examine the phenomenom of mixed signals and self awareness. You have pretty well captured my own attitudes and experiences, which is amazing as I couldn't have done it as well as you just did.
I'm in a wonderful marriage with a loving wife and could never accept being regarded as gay, yet I've always felt an attraction to a well built guy and admired the physical beauty of an attractive male. At the same time I have also loved the female form and been hetro all of my life.
Maybe I've just got an artist's appreciation for the human form?
Thanks for sharing with us and good luck with your relationships! Hairy

Posted 05-03-2008 at 09:00 AM by Hairy Hairy is offline

Hairy,

So nice to know you admire my "truths" as well as my fiction. Thanks! Perhaps visually oriented people like us are naturally prone to appreciating our fellow males when they are particularly well put together. I want to figure out a way to honestly share that with my girlfriend so that she understands it isn't a threat to our relationship... Still not quite sure I should, though, or how to do it if I do...

MBe

Posted 05-05-2008 at 08:46 PM by Male Bonding etc Male Bonding etc is offline

Explaining attraction

Male Bonding,
Thanks for the response. I've never tried to explain or excuse my awareness of other men. I'm sure that both my first wife and my present one are aware that I enjoy looking and that I am at the same time totally faitful within the relationship. Some times it's just not worth the risk of screwing up a good marriage by going into an explanation that hasn't been asked for. If it were ever required I'm certain that my present wife would accept and understand.

Good wishes for you and your continued happiness. Hairy

Posted 05-06-2008 at 08:38 PM by Hairy Hairy is offline

Thanks again, Hairy.

I am trying to proceed with something akin to that kind of sensitivity. However, it can feel a little like I am withholding... but there are indeed so many things in our lives that don't need to be shared. To share them is to essentially "make much ado about nothing."

On the other hand there are those important aspects of ourselves that cause difficulty if it looks as if we have ever tried to conceal them.

This is probably best treated as not-that-important even though, in my mind, it falls close to the line.

MBe

Posted 05-27-2008 at 08:30 AM by Male Bonding etc Male Bonding etc is offline

Hi, your honesty is appealing and you write so well. I enjoyed reading your blog. I felt sad for you that your college buddy dumped you when he got married. I got suddenly dumped by my best friend when his twin brother realised how close we were. Just like you two, no sex but great intimacy. He felt threatened and afraid that his brother might believe that I had "turned him gay" or something, so I was literally kicked out of his bedroom one day and after a couple more days sleeping out on the porch I left and we have never spoken again. Something similar might have happened with your friend's wife. She might suspect that he's bi and she might blame you. (He could actually be in the closet and she might have guessed). He might resent you for this, unjustifiably.

Once you got married I suppose he was even angrier because he could no longer cherish a fantasy of escaping his marriage to live with you. He must have felt abandoned even though it seems like he abandoned you first.

It's a sad story. I have never bonded with another male as strongly since, though I did live with a great young guy who became close to me and who still is my friend now that he has a fiancé - he always made it clear that he is straight and I think because I respected that, the relationship lasted.

I don't think you can explain this to your wife, and even if you could, there is nothing to be gained since your old friend is lost to you now. On the other hand, you might introduce her to the idea of bisexuality and ask her what she thinks of MMF sex? This could be a way of bringing your male desires into the marriage and including her, without going outside or threatening her with an interest in somebody she doesn't know. What do you think?

Posted 03-20-2011 at 08:10 AM by NoH8 NoH8 is offline

Updated 03-20-2011 at 08:12 AM by NoH8

	One word for this posting....GAY. Just be who you are dude and don't worry about what the world or everyone else thinks.
	Posted 03-05-2008 at 07:18 PM by ncguy207

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	Okay!
	Posted 12-30-2007 at 06:15 AM by Whopper-lee