Boyfriend's Penis is too small

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by Dayna, Sep 17, 2006.

  1. Dayna

    Dayna New Member

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    I hate to admit it, but my boyfriend of over a year is just not cutting it for me.

    My story is the typical lost girl who gets her life back on track. I'm 20 years old, but as a teen I was a wild girl. I was really into the hip hop scene which lead me to sleep with quite a few black guys (not more than 10). All of whom were big, and while i never measured any, a lot seem twice the lenght and thickness of my boyfriend.

    My mom moved towns to live with her sister and since then I've become a rather good girl. I'm in College now doing Architecture so my life has changed quite a bit.

    Ok but enough with the life story an not into the sex.

    I met my bf when i now started college. He's a very cool, fun, smart guy. He doesn't know much about my past exploits, but he knows I wasn't a virgin...unlike him.


    I fell for him because i was so lonely when college started. Despite my past, I'm not a typical party girl, so I made little friends at first.


    However, upon making out with him the first time i realized how much smaller he was compared to my exes.

    He's about 5'', possibly less, and about 4.5'' around. Which I'd say is very small.


    I have many problems with this size. I used to love straddling my exes while we made out. However, with him it's almost pointless since I barely feel it.

    Another problem is that I used to love dirty dancing, aka grinding. Mainly due to the dick rubbing pussy contact. However, again sometimes while dancing with him, I don't even know if he's hard. Pardon the pun, but that is a huge contrast to dancing with other guys I knew. When i grind my ass on him at clubs, I simply never feel his penis. This has basically killed my fun in dancing.

    On the other hand, sex is both good and bad. I love him and we're very passionate and I do cum from penetration. But ofcourse sex has its problems. I think I've only had one vaginal orgasm with him and that was because I forcing his penis deeper inside and while squeezing my pussy really hard around his penis.

    With him, there are only two positions that pleasure me. Missionary and me on top riding him.

    Almost all others, I just don't feel him, or he's not long enough to do it properly.

    The worst by far is doggy style which was my previous favourite. I simply can not feel him in that position. Honestly while he penetrates me, I just don't know if he's hard, if he's fully in or what. It's hopeless.

    Now, does he know my feelings?

    Yes and No. He doesn't know how much bigger guys I've had and how much better they felt. But Yes he knows that some positions and acts, he doesn't provide much pleasure, but he may think its just me (which it honestly could be).



    I'm really sorry for the long post, but it has been bothering me a lot.


    What should I do? I do love him, and he cares so much about me. Despite my rantings, our sex life is not horrible as I cum almost everytime we have sex. However, he honestly doesn't fully satisfy me.

    Should I just learn to deal with it? Or should I end it now because it doesn't make sense continueing if he doesn't fully satisfy me? Should I make him use dildo's, penis extensions or strap ones? Or is that just being shallow and selfish?
     
  2. bigenough4u

    bigenough4u New Member

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    i vote you go the route of penis extensions and strap ons. i know if it were me i would want to know i wasnt pleasing you, and i would do anything to fully satisfy you. so bring it up, and more than likely it will be a turn on for him and the wildest sex he has ever had.
     
  3. Dayna

    Dayna New Member

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    Well I've been with him for over a year now. It didn't take longer than a week to realize that he was significantly smaller. Yet, I'm still with him.

    In the beginning, it honestly didn't matter. I always thought my pussy would adjust (btw I've been doing kegals for almost 7 months now), or he'd learn other ways to satisfy me.

    It's only now I'm begining to feel a bit confused as to what to do. Should I be content? Why is it so hard for me to be content?

    What really upsets me is that I know if wasn't such a slut a few years ago, I'd have nothing to compare him with and I'd be so happy and content with him sexually.
     
  4. Lordpendragon

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    It sounds as if you are naturally built for a bigger guy if seven months of kegals has made little difference.

    The issue about toys etc is that you will be effectively telling him that his cock isn't big enough for you most of the time. But then should he be given the respect to have a choice about this? He may decide to leave you and I imagine you are scared of this.

    It's a difficult one - maybe this isn't the right board to ask the question. I'm sure there are better one's where many women have successfully compromised over smaller penises. More here have to compromise over too large ones.
     
  5. transformer_99

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    Move on from BF status to FWFFWIW (Friends who f*ck for whatever it's worth). You claim to love him, yet met him out of desparation for a solution to college loneliness. New girl in town, spread you legs to make new male friends, hardly a unique story. You are going to meet those that want to do the same for you. Doesn't make either of you the bad guy in the whole process. College, you are there to educate yourself and learn. So is he, not every handshake @ introduction ends in a lifelong friendship or soulmate. It sounds to me like you know what you're after sexually, go do/get it done and stop worrying about an answer you already know/have. That guy will deal with it and move on just the same too. He may not even have you on the "A" list for the long term.
     
  6. Snakebyte

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    well, suggesting the use of dildos should be no problem. Extensions and especially strap-ons may hurt his feelings very hard. Be honest about it. But be sensitive as stated before.
    Just don't go on without telling the truth and feeling uncomfortable
     
  7. Dayna

    Dayna New Member

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    has any one of you used strap-ons or penis extensions? How comfortable are they for us?
     
  8. MikeTheMeat

    MikeTheMeat New Member

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    I agree do not suggest strap ons or extensions to him. However you can ask if you can introduce a big dildo into your sex life. I am sure he would go along with this just fine. Put a spin on it, like you want to give him a show. Or you want him to fuck you with it. Then in return ask him if he wants you to do something for him. Maybe he will want you to dress up as a cheerleader or something, who knows, it could be a deliciously wonderful trade the sends your sex life into the stratosphere.

    The thing about rebounding and finding this guy and settling sounds like bullshit to me. You wouldn't be on here asking this question if you didn't REALLY LOVE or at least CARE for this man so your relationship sounds good to me.

    Just don't hurt him. Extensions and straps on are like taking away his manhood and that would be painful to almost ANY guy. Don't do that to him, he doesn't deserve that. No guy deserves that actually. But the introducing sex toys into your relationship might work for you two and you might REALLY love it. Ask him to lick on your clit while he fucks you will the dildo you two buy together. Let him be a part of it, and he will have NO PROBLEM I can assure you of that...

    Who knows it could be a fantasy of his also. I know if I were with a girl and she wanted to do that it would turn me on. Cause then I would get to pick something to try and that would make me horny as hell...
     
  9. PussyWellington

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    Let me see.....you joined a Large Penis support group today, to tell everyone that although you "love your boyfriend very much" he's too small. I'm not quite sure what the point of your post is and I believe that www.measurection.com is more what you're looking for.


    I seriously believe that if you had any feelings for him you would discuss this matter privately and together, not in a large penis forum. I apologize if this comes across as aggressive, it's not meant to be. Just realistic.
     
  10. Mr. Snakey

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    My dear you stretched your pussy out with huge cocks,your own fault The problem isnt your boyfriends cock is to small. Its that your pussy is too big You got yourself into this. Get yourself out of it:rolleyes:
     
  11. 20cm

    20cm New Member

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    You should never tell a guy that his penis is too small. That would totally kill all his self-confidence for a very long time. If you stay with him he will always be jealous on other guys and maybe even leave you. If you leave him he will have BIG troubles to go on and find a new girl.

    I don’t think girls can understand how important penis size is for guys. To feel too small is like feeling worthless for most guys. Maybe there are guys that learn to deal with it but then I guess they have to sacrifice a lot of things along that road.

    I’m big myself, 8 inch, but the fact that my girlfriend has been with one guy, one night, a long time ago that also was that big has sometimes driving me crazy! I know that it sounds silly!!!! But I have learnt that that is the way almost all men works. We want to be the biggest, and if that is not the situation, we don’t want to hear about it.

    Sorry if my English sucks… I’m not used to write in English. But this was too important.
     
  12. Mr. Snakey

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    Once they have that huge meat thats it! Its over with.:wink:
     
  13. Skull Mason

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    Real Jersey meat!
     
  14. Mr. Snakey

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    Thats right Mason! Its the water in Jersey All the men are horse hung:biggrin1:
     
  15. Heather LouAnna

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    I'm gonna be blunt. I'm gonna say exactly what I'm thinking. Please just hear it out, man.


    You're twenty years old. You say you love this guy. That's fine.

    The chances of you two getting married may be high or not..........the chances of you staying together forever (considering divorce rates) are very low.

    You say you love this guy, but if there's problems like this that really........can't be fixed.....lol then..I derno. I wouldn't stay with him.....*sigh* BUT first things first. There may be a solution to this somehow, but only if he's really secure with himself. If you don't bring this problem to light, you're just gonna find another problem to break up with him.

    It sounds like this situation is eating away at you. You feel terribly guilty....and you should never feel guilty about what you want.
     
  16. Skull Mason

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    Yeah I read a lot of posts on here that say 'well if you really love him then it shouldn't matter etc' or things along those lines. But we are sexual creatures! All your wildest dreams and fantasies can be played out sexually in the bedroom. Since I was little boy I dreamed of doing things with women, and yes, sex is a MAJOR part of any relationship I choose to be in. I was with a girl I really 'loved', but she couldn't handle or even come NEAR matching me in my sexual intensity/desire/passion. I was unhappy. I couldn't deal with it and I ended up doing things with...well somethings are better left unsaid. But it had to end.

    If you are actually thinking that you may be with this boy down the road, stop right now. THINK about it. There was another post on here similar to this where I said that women probably end up unhappily in marriage because they chose someone they really liked/loved and didn't take into account the fact that they are stuck with that penis FOR LIFE. You need to choose a mate who can match you in all ways. Sexually, mentally, physically. If you have more desire than your lame husband who won't fuck you, guess what is gonna happen? Your gonna fuck someone else or be miserable. And if it can't satisfy you then you aren't going to be satisfied FOREVER. Your second guessing yourself now, think about in 10 years. People may think that is shallow but its not. You have one life to live and its YOUR life, if you need a big cock then go find it.

    Come to New Jersey we got mad thugs here!
     
  17. Heather LouAnna

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    I understand this isn't the point you were making, Mr Mason, but I'd just like to take the time and say that I disagree with this statement entirely.

    Don't do what's best for other people. You're twenty fucking years old. Think back ten years. How many people do you know now..that you knew ten years ago....And think ten years in the future. The chances of you staying with this guy with something this big (or rather..this small) as a problem.................c'mon. Be realistic.

    And that love shit........it's overrated. Use your head. Your heart doesn't think. Love is just chemicals in your brain. Real love is reason and honesty, man. The best thing you can do in this world is be true to yourself.

    Sure, you can worry about hurting his feelings, but I'd take your feelings into consideration first. Living for other people isn't living.
     
  18. Ed69

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    I feel sorry for you.:eek22:
     
  19. rob_just_rob

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    Speaking as someone who once stayed in a relationship too long, out of guilt... HL's advice is bang on.

    If it isn't working for you (OP), move on. Be nice about it. By all means tell him a white lie or three if you have to - it's not fair to criticise him for what sounds like a not-unusually-small penis. But it'll just make you resentful if you try and tell yourself you should be happy with this person (and aren't)... and the eventual breakup will be much worse.

    On the other hand - if you really do love the guy... how happy will you be with a different guy who fulfils you sexually, but doesn't fulfil you in the other ways? The ideal would be to find the perfect guy - but perfect people don't grow on trees.

    I'm not entirely clear on what you were hoping for when you posted here... I don't think any of us know the situation well enough to give an educated opinion. You're 20; you haven't dated a lot of people. Leaving all penis-related issues out of the equation, I think it would do both of you good to see what else is out there. But that's my universal advice to 20 year olds who aren't sure if they've found "The One".

    Good luck.
     
  20. stretcher74

    stretcher74 New Member

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    I think this post was written by a guy.