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Deciding when to cum
- Thread starter Jason
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I put down that I can control it usually. I mean by that I can stop thrusting and concentrate for a while on where my partner is enjoyment wise (eyes rolled back in head, volumn of moans, tongue hanging out, etc.) until the "urge" is past and then start thrusting again. When receiving oral I pull out and clench my groin muscles and watch their eyes cross and their mouth try to follow the dancing penis. He thinks I'm just teasing. Well, actually I guess I am....... 
However if my partner is on top I have to think about the crack in the ceiling or something to slow it down. If he starts playing with MY tits its a lost cause....
However if my partner is on top I have to think about the crack in the ceiling or something to slow it down. If he starts playing with MY tits its a lost cause....
It all depends how excited I am. At home I want to cum as much as I can so there are a lot of five minute wonders but when I really want to take my time I can. I don't usually cum when I'm trying not to ya know? Like when you try to stop then it just cums out...that doesnt happen too often. When I was younger though (well a year or two ago) every session was at least 45 mins to an hour long...
Everyone has a measure of control I suppose, as it's a simple matter of slowing down, speeding up, or stopping completely which gives you limited control.
As for being able to ejaculate on demand, though, that's something we should all aspire to, even if it's just for practical joke purposes.
As for being able to ejaculate on demand, though, that's something we should all aspire to, even if it's just for practical joke purposes.
I have always been able to control ejaculation if I wanted to and do not know what the technique is called because I discovered it by accident when a teen. Just short of the actual ejaculation I learned to force a "relax" or "uncontract" to all the groin muscles much like what you do when you are trying very hard to urinate or defecate as quickly as possible. This apprently causes a blockage of the passageway from the prostate and allows the inevitable "gush" feeling to pass. Tensing these muscles will result in instant ejaculation when at point of no return. Of course you have to accompany the forced relaxation with cessation of penile movement. After 20-30 seconds of the forced relax mode you can resume. What is this method called?
I cum when i want to.
I realize how lucky that is. But, it took practice.
In my teens/early twenties i suffered from premature ejaculation.
My partners and I all got tired of that.
So, i trained myself out of it with various techniques (stop/start...concentration, etc).
Getting used to having sex regularly cured me of that overexcitement phase,
and by my mid twenties i was where i am now:
I choose when I cum....faster or slower, whatever your pleasure.
I realize how lucky that is. But, it took practice.
In my teens/early twenties i suffered from premature ejaculation.
My partners and I all got tired of that.
So, i trained myself out of it with various techniques (stop/start...concentration, etc).
Getting used to having sex regularly cured me of that overexcitement phase,
and by my mid twenties i was where i am now:
I choose when I cum....faster or slower, whatever your pleasure.
MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK
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I always have complete control and my last couple of gf's sometimes had to beg for me to let it loose in due time. But I don't want to ejaculate too fast & rob them of their orgasm. There have been only a select few that I've ever really and truly had simultaneous orgasms with, and I got to tell you; That feeling they get when they start bucking and their cunts are contracting around my dick kicks me straight into overdrive with my cumshots.
- Donk,
Your poll is missing a category for guys who can delay cumming for long periods but don't necessarily have "control" to suddenly come very quickly. I would put myself more in this category. When having sex with my woman, I usually have tremendous control over delaying my orgasm until after she has had several. I could probably go for hours if desired, but usually decide that about 45 mins.-1 hour is enough and let 'er rip. After I decide to go ahead and let myself cum, it usually takes me a few minutes to work myself back up to the point of making it happen. I usually can't just instantly go ahead and cum because the trick to delaying orgasm is taking myself right up to the brink and then backing off.
My penis has never had a hair trigger (except for a few time when I was younger and having first-time sex with girls after much foreplay had already brought me to the brink before penetration). When jacking off, I can cum quickly if needed (years of training with those frantic sessions as a teen! or hold off if I have time to savor it. But I learned early on that women like you to last longer when you're in them and developed my sense of control over delay in actual intercourse.
My penis has never had a hair trigger (except for a few time when I was younger and having first-time sex with girls after much foreplay had already brought me to the brink before penetration). When jacking off, I can cum quickly if needed (years of training with those frantic sessions as a teen!
or hold off if I have time to savor it. But I learned early on that women like you to last longer when you're in them and developed my sense of control over delay in actual intercourse.- Max,
I fall into another missing category:
First orgasm, almost no control at all, sometimes it comes very quickly, sometimes it takes longer but I can rarely hold it back by my own decision. But very often either I recover very quickly, or more usually I simply stay hard and carry on almost immediately.
Second orgasm, by contrast: almost complete control.
First orgasm, almost no control at all, sometimes it comes very quickly, sometimes it takes longer but I can rarely hold it back by my own decision. But very often either I recover very quickly, or more usually I simply stay hard and carry on almost immediately.
Second orgasm, by contrast: almost complete control.
FieldRatt9
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It depends on the mood. Sometimes I'm a stud with hella staying power...othertimes I'm pulling out and gasping for breath gently pulling on my sac to delay the experience. But I have found that at least for me (might be a mental thing) but if I have 2 Tom Collins and some Guacamole...I'm a BULL !!!
Good stuff, what you are doing is called a reverse Kegel and correct in all aspects that it entails and better yet it works. To take that one step further though I guess one should difine "cum". Does this mean "orgasm" or "ejaculatation"?? I have experienced orgasms without ejaculating and I'm sure all have heard of this technique by which one does a hard kegel right at the critical point of PONR (point of no return) and holding back the ejaculation. There is a little more to it than that but that is the jist. Some more info at Tantric Multiple Orgasms. I have to say when you do decide to ejaculate it is like every cell in your body is exloding.
carolinacurious: I'm more like Donk, easy to delay, very hard to speed up.
I've tried the tantric multiple orgasm thing, for me it's more likely to result in ejaculation without orgasm than the other way around. (and that bites!
I've tried the tantric multiple orgasm thing, for me it's more likely to result in ejaculation without orgasm than the other way around. (and that bites!
orionsword57:
In younger days, I was in your camp. Now age allows more control the first (and usually only) time.
In younger days, I was in your camp. Now age allows more control the first (and usually only) time.
Motlissof: Congrats on your technique which you learned as a boy. I too learned that orgasms could be controlled by kegels and cooling down when you reach the point of no return. This made jacking off as a boy somewhat divine. About ten years or so ago, Mantok Chia and Douglas Abrams wrote "The Multi-Orgasmic Man." I am rereading the book now. I may be wrong, but it is mostly Tantric Sex and Taoism. The premise of the book is that a man can have several orgasms without ejaculating and then have a total body one that rocks the body causing a tingling sensation all over a mans body. All that without ever ejaculating. For you guys with patient wives willing to spend over an hour in sex, you are in the drivers seat. As for me, my sweetie likes things fast and furious but hey, Im not complaining. I would just like to try everything once within the reasonable bounds of matrimony. If any guys out there are in similar circumstances having a wife who likes it all fast and hot, and now you have changed the scenario to sessions of about an hour, please educate me how you did it. I see this book discussed frequently by men, and consider it a must read for conniseurs. I just dont know how to change my wifes thinking, Maybe a long vacation with nothing to do but make love, exercise and eat.........?
Good stuff, what you are doing is called a reverse Kegel and correct in all aspects that it entails and better yet it works. To take that one step further though I guess one should difine "cum". Does this mean "orgasm" or "ejaculatation"?? I have experienced orgasms without ejaculating and I'm sure all have heard of this technique by which one does a hard kegel right at the critical point of PONR (point of no return) and holding back the ejaculation. There is a little more to it than that but that is the jist. Some more info at Tantric Multiple Orgasms. I have to say when you do decide to ejaculate it is like every cell in your body is exloding.
[post=291170]Quoted post[/post]
[/b][/quote]Again I accomplished what you have described only once or twice and again had no idea what I was doing at time but trying to delay the inevitable -- was rather shocked to have a few pleasurable waves shake the body with no emission, but then later when ejaculation did occur, I remember now that I went into some sort of spasm that I thought was about to split me in half. Then, hell, I forgot later what I had done -- thanks for the memories, may try again some time.
I'm able to control it but usually prefer not to. What I've found is that I enjoy the mood & pleasure of my partner, and usually follow her lead. Of course this changes as do my moods. I've been with the same woman for two years so we know each other very well sexually. Our emotional bond dictates our sexual expression, so I've had orgasms that aren't just genital but where the feeling is all through my body. Its feels like my whole body is exploding or imploding, and sometimes without ejaculation. I think that a part of love-making is mysterious.
