How to not hurt her

Discussion in 'Sex With a Large Penis' started by Imported, Jan 4, 2003.

  1. Imported

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    monkey127z: My girlfriend and I have been having sex for some time now and there has never once been a time i didn't hurt her.

    That may sound bad...lemme explain

    If its been a few days since we last had sex then I will tear the bottom of her vagina.

    And no matter how turned on and wet she is, the instance she starts to hurt she loses that moisture.

    She always told me I was a very thick man, but until recently I didn't think I was. I'm very happy to have discovered this forum and feel relieved to read about other ppl in simular situations.

    We looked into a lot of options to help us. We're constantly using our saliva to moisten us...but that runs dry. I can go very slow and still hurt her.

    I've grown increasing worried about this. The last thing I want during sex is to look down and see her bleeding and hurt. She says it's never horrible, but after too long she has to stop. I'm afraid that if i can't fix this we'll stop wanting sex all together.

    We've tried every position we can think of. Most of which i have to keep my strokes shallow...otherwise her cervix bothers her.

    I'm getting desperate. I'd appreciate any advice any has to offer me. My next step will be to try lub. But i don't know how much or what kind to get. She is very sensitive down there.

    I need to research more comfortable condoms, and I'm considereing surgical solution. (I do NOT want surgery...but its hard to live with the idea that I'm doomed to hurt her)

    Please help. And feel free to email me at kingofthemonkeys@hotmail.com

    thanks
     
  2. Max

    Max New Member

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    Monkey,

    You've come to the right place. Plenty of us (myself included) have had to deal with the issues you mention.

    But in order to help, you need to give a bit more information. In particular, your dimensions. Also, when you say the bottom of her vagina, do you mean the cervix area, or the labia? In my experience a big guy can cause pain and bleeding in both areas, but one may be more about length (damage to the cervix), the other more about the size of your glans (head of the penis) and the stretching it causes upon entry. Is it thickness or length that is the problem, or both?

    I am surprised you as a big guy have tried sex without lube. I reckon you should put that right straight away. I use KY, but try others if that causes problems.

    If length is the problem, and you find yourself unable to exercise restraint in the depth of your thrusts, you could use one or more "donuts".

    We could give you more help once you give us a bit more to go on.

    Good luck!
     
  3. Imported

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    monkey127z: I'm in a dorm right now..and have nothing to measure by. sorry...i asked my neighbors, but we hardly have a broom never the less a tape measure.

    Restraint is no problem...I can control myself.

    I can give you 'ghetto' measurements. Comparing myself to common household items around the dorm ‡-)

    When I tear her, it happens at the bottom of her vagina. Where her vagina meets her anus.

    I'm kinda concerned about trying KY. She gets UTI's any time she changes soap or uses bubble bath. I need something that will won't irritate her.

    Thanks for your advice
     
  4. Imported

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    AnonyMs: She might want to ask her doctor about a lubricant that will not irritate her. And if you are going to be involved extremely long term, she might ask the doc about a procedure similar to an episiotomy. If she is indeed tearing as you indicate, seeing the doctor while she is torn will make a persuasive case.

    Good luck.
     
  5. Imported

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    monkey127z: thanks for your input....

    gosh i was really hopeing i could find a quick fix to this.
     
  6. Imported

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    wvu_kerq: Hey I'll offer female advise to you and your girlfriend. First and formost, she needs to see a gyno! Her gyno can recomend lubes, procedures, ect. I'd sugest astroglide or sexlube as lubes and try fingering her with lube on your hands before sex, it will put lots of lub inside her to begin with. Second, don't panic! :eek: There's a million other things you can do until you find a solution.
     
  7. Imported

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    monkey127z: i think lub alone has made a great difference

    we had a great time with some ky lube

    thanks for everyone's help
     
  8. Desmond_decker

    Desmond_decker New Member

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    She should talk to her doctor first thing. Sometime tearing pain can be result of an E inbalance. She may not have noticed with smaller guys. Also thick tear the bottom? not somewhere else. Lube is good but be careful a women's virginal structure move to faciltate pentration and orgasm when aroused in addition to lubracating. You know I have had so great experences let my partner play with me erect penis. Szie has something to do with it but I think its the erect-ness. She's turned on knowing your tunred on. But I don't kknow what I doing but she does.
     
  9. D_alex8

    D_alex8 Member

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    And the new LPSG record for 'reviving a long-dormant thread' now stands at:

    4 years and 20 days

    That is gonna take some beating, people. :rolleyes: