I need advice about my fuck buddy agreement

[Wish-4-8]

Dolfette and Skyray are my heroes in this thread. Wisdom beyond belief.

The only thing I could add is that you need to leave the situation because of how you feel, period. Regardless of the specifics or what "agreements" were made, this arrangement is making you feel like shit. And you are not going to change him by playing games either.

Get out, find a better arrangment, and feel better.

 

[wallyj84]

Unfortunately no I didn't. He looked fine and I know looks can be decieving but im sure I would have felt some symptoms by now. He didn't seem like the whoring type so I trusted he didnt have anything. Me on the other hand....i've been tested like 5 times in the past 2 years so I know I dont have anything. Last time I was tested was in July so if he gave me something I would know. I know its a sad statistic when you see how many young people are infected with stds especially AIDS/HIV but I really did trust he didn't have anything

...

Some people are not mentally and emotionally ready for sex. I think you are one of those people.

 

[badgirl1]

Okay I was once in this situation but he only disrespected me ONCE and I left him alone. I went and found someone else who was better in bed and treated me better. Also I ALWAYS use condoms no matter what. Since condoms are not 100% safe I still get tested.

 

[latin_cock]

Honestly have some self-respect and stop allowing this asshole to treat you like a piece of meat. I am sure the sex is not worth being treated like a piece of shit and if you put up with this kind of shit just for sex then you need to seek help

 

[dolfette]

she is, as my pal B would say, fuck struck.

 

[MR.BLACK]

guys have a term for this pussyblinders and ive meet a lot of guys who are effected

 

[B_am12388]

He sounds like a real prick. Leave him, NOW.

 

[dirk2d]

Since I seemed to have wanted sex more than he thought he limited to strictly 3 times a week. It took him 8 months of persuasion to get me to give him oral sex.

I've heard about "treat em mean keep em keen" but this is fucking ridiculous. Does this man have half a brain cell? Does he even produce testosterone? Is this even a MAN we're talking about? 3 Times a week?!! 3 times a day is a better place to start.

8 months of persuasion?!! If a woman wants to blow you, you let her do her thing right away! On top of all the other shit he's putting you through he sounds like a fuckwit, probably very insecure and gets off on getting under peoples skin. He's not only using you for sex but also for pleasure he gets from his twisted, immature mind games. Its a big world out there, go find yourself a real man.

 

[EboniGoddess]

That is how most people felt about someone who gave them an STD. If you continue to fuck him at least use something. Always protect yourself.

girly, you need a slap.
seriously.


Ok...the lasy few times we had sex we did use a condom. Not so much for protection but because he cums too fast and he needs to last longer.

you let yourself be just a hole for this wanker, {fuck buddy involves being a BUDDY. mutual respect? you are just a hole.} and you risk your health and your life because his tackle looks clean.

this isn't how grown ups should be running their lives. you're acting in a very stupid & childish way.

if you want a fuck buddy i suggest you find one who both treats you with respect and insists on being rubbered up.
and, no, nobody is obligated to give you sex whenever you demand it. if he doesn't feel like it then why should he?

I dont think I'm acting childish. Everyone make mistakes but like I said I was tested in July (and earlier this year) when our agreement was on and both of them came out negative. The only way I could get something at this point is if he goes behind our agreement and catches something from someone else.

you want kids one day, yes?

how would you feel about our daughter being in the situation you are in right now? what would you say to her? reread your posts as though you're a mother...which you may never become if you have symptomless chlamydia. it often renders women infertile.

Me and him have actually talked about this. His parents would be very upset if they found out he was having sex. They have sort of a don't ask dont tell thing with them. My family woud be upset too. Not at the fact that I'm having sex (they know i'm not a virgin) but at the fact i'm having unprotected sex. He's talked about when he haves children and a girl specifically. He once said "do you know what i'd do to the guy he breaks my daughter's heart?" Neither one of us want our children to do what we are doing. I wonder what he would think about a guy disrespecting his daughter? I agreed to the fuck buddy thing because i'm young (im not saying im having unprotected sex for the same reason). I'm young and I would like to have sex. Everyone should have someone to have sex with.

He sounds like a real prick. Leave him, NOW.

I've heard about "treat em mean keep em keen" but this is fucking ridiculous. Does this man have half a brain cell? Does he even produce testosterone? Is this even a MAN we're talking about? 3 Times a week?!! 3 times a day is a better place to start.

8 months of persuasion?!! If a woman wants to blow you, you let her do her thing right away! On top of all the other shit he's putting you through he sounds like a fuckwit, probably very insecure and gets off on getting under peoples skin. He's not only using you for sex but also for pleasure he gets from his twisted, immature mind games. Its a big world out there, go find yourself a real man.

I'd love to have sex 3 times a day but I can't. I can only choose 3 specific days a week to have sex. It seems as though he can't keep up with my demands.
When I was talking about the blow job it was me who didn't want to give it. I always said I wasn't giving oral sex until I was married. After 8 months I gave in and now he gets oral sex.

 

[dolfette]

yes, it is childish and silly to trust your sexual health to a man who you can't even trust to behave decently towards you.
and even with protection, he's still an arse.

it's just sex. it's not worth it.

 

[D_Ellerby Eatsprick]

Unfortunately no I didn't. He looked fine and I know looks can be decieving but im sure I would have felt some symptoms by now. He didn't seem like the whoring type so I trusted he didnt have anything. Me on the other hand....i've been tested like 5 times in the past 2 years so I know I dont have anything. Last time I was tested was in July so if he gave me something I would know. I know its a sad statistic when you see how many young people are infected with stds especially AIDS/HIV but I really did trust he didn't have anything

You can't just look at someone and assume they are fine. Many STDs are silent and wreak havoc inside the person's body without them knowing. Many people can be a carrier and be asymptomatic.

You need to end this fuck buddy agreement and find another that treats you with better respect inside and outside the bedroom, regardless of how long you've known them. I've had fuck buddies that treated me better than the one treating you.

 

[dolfette]

i've had some lovely fuck buddies!
men i felt i could trust and rely on. he hung out as mates and scratched each other's itches.
mutual trust and respect are vital if you want things to run smoothly.

 

[D_76froy]

Unless you like being treated like shit, drop him and go fuck someone who respects you. All this sounds like crap. He's an asshole. He only thinks of you as a convenient fuckhole. You can find better friends and I know you can find someone better to fuck.

 

[Principessa]

Rommette, your mutual friends know about the arrangement because your FB has told them, because he is an asshole.

You need to find a new one who is a little more mature and knows the importance of being discreet about the arrangement. I know it would be tough to give up the thing you feel you really need, but if you want to have any self-respect left, you need to end it now.

I agree 110%. :yup:

You've had issues with this man/child before if I'm not mistaken. He needs to go, like yesterday. You do not need his trifling ass in your life.

 

[dirk2d]

I'd love to have sex 3 times a day but I can't. I can only choose 3 specific days a week to have sex. It seems as though he can't keep up with my demands.
When I was talking about the blow job it was me who didn't want to give it. I always said I wasn't giving oral sex until I was married. After 8 months I gave in and now he gets oral sex.

Oh, my bad, I must've read it too fast. I was thinking "He made you wait 8 months until he let you go down on him? This guy is not sane!" Lol.

But do you see what you said above? You'd love to have sex 3 times a day but you can't, you can only choose 3 specific days? Who is he to tell you what to do and when? Maybe you can't have sex with him 3 times a day but I reckon 90% of the rest of the men in the world wouldn't have a problem going 3 rounds in a day, if not more!

I'll say it again, go find a real man. As soon as you do, you'll forget about this loser and you'll look back on this and laugh at how silly you're being, no offence. :smile:

 

[D_Tina_Ciao]

I agree with those who say, let go. A man can separate sex and love - sex is just sex to him and he's not even showing love as a friend - in your fuck buddy agreement, he's using you to get what he wants without taking any consideration at all for your needs and desires - a very bad arrangement. He IS an asshole - there are a lot of them out there. Some guilt (unspecified, but underneath) MAY be there if he found God, and it may cause him to act in a way that supports his guilt - in any case, he doesn't care how you feel. Get out and find somebody better. :yup:

 

[Countryguy63]

Roomette,,

I'm a bit confused..Do you really want help, or just ranting?

You are allowing yourself to be treated this way. It wasn't and isn't a one time thing. If that's ok with you, then far be it for us to tell you how you should feel.

However, if you are asking if this is acceptable to most people, you are getting your answer loud and clear. NO There are many people out there that are able to be a FB and a friend, or at least treat someone with respect at the same time.

Before asking us to be honest with you, you need to be honest with us, and youself.

 

[ten2ride]

Girl, I feel the need to add my comments.

I was there once myself. I was in my 20's & met a girl who I became friends with. We hung out, went to parties together & all, but were nt totally hooked on each other. There was an underlying lust we both knew was there, but didn't act on it until onw night when we had both been drinking & the situation was just right. We had sex & at the time we both thought it was incredible.

We began to have sex frequently. She would come to my house & we would fuck each other's brains out, but after a few months, I started to become disrespectful to her. I guess it was because we were not really connected at the heart & mind enough to be having sex that often. Now don;t get me wrong, I can enjoy sex very much with nearly any good looking woman, but it is a physical thing, and it does not mean I am able to enjoy spending too much time with that person.

If you want a fuck buddy, my suggestion is you get a half dozen and end the exclusive thing with the current guy. Tell him he is just not that special, and you have your life. Tell him you want two or three guys at once & when you've got another guy with you, invite him over if you want, or whatever. The thing is the two of you are simply not emotionally connected in a way that supports as frequent of sex as you are having, and he is still very immature.

Get some new cock, and drop him, or at least decrease the frequency you get together with him. Find new friends. If he comes crawling back to you, make it clear he WILL be good to you, or he is gone...

If you don't want the confrontation, hen just find a few new fuck buddies & drift away...

For damn sure, what you've got going on is NOT good for you at all & the moew you put up with it the more it will fuck you up in the head.

 

[Jumbo151]

Morning Rommette:

Get rid of the jerk. No one, has the right to treat you the way he does. He's just using you to get his jollies. Fuck buddy or not, he should be treating you, with respect. All he wants to do is Rutt. That's not even good sex. Good sex, is making sure your that your partners needs are met, satisfaction given, is satisfaction returned. He can and should be replaced. There are plenty of men who'd give anything to find a woman like you. Just iggy him for a while, see what else is out there. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised.

 

[Countryguy63]

By the way,

Forgot to say, above you give 2 choices that I feel are appropriate

First, if you haven't already, and I would wonder why except, I refer to my 1st post....you defintely need to tell him how you are feeling. Then, if he doesn't change, which I'd bet bucks that he won't, then leave his ass.

Get control of the situation babe. You're worth more

Oh, and regarding the risky sex, you know