Sorry I might be confused, are you saying you can climax through oral stimulation of the clitoris but not clitorally climax during penetration? If so doesn't that seem a little "odd" considering it can be stimulated by both oral and penetration but you cannot climax through penetration?
I'm not saying your husband is a bad lover or that something is wrong with you; however I'm very curious on how this could be considering without a mental or physical differences the cause and affect should be the same.
Again I'm just curious and am in no way shape or form trying to ridicule or belittle anything you have said. It doesn't matter what I believe as it is your experience and nothing I say or do can change that.
Dregun
obviously this is another example of a man trying to tell me how my body works. Let me suggest you look at Grey's Anatomy or any other diagram of the clitoris, there is a very thin hood that often has to be pulled back to give direct stimulation to the actual clitoral glans to reach orgasm. Simply tapping this area doesnt quite do it for most women. It takes an intense focus and consistent rhythm and pressure. Women also don't have the "point of inevitability" that men have when they get close to orgasm and they can stop stroking and continue onto an orgasm and ejaculation. Women can have their orgasm stop before or during a peak if distracted.
I know a lot about masturbation and i can give myself dozens of clitoral orgasms on my own. My husband can give me oral or manually stimulate me to orgasm. Thrusting alone will not do it. The back side of the clitoris has a wall of tissue and muscle much further from the bundle of nerves if you try to stimulate it from the vagina. While the g-spot feels good and speeds up my ability to have a clitoral orgasm when stimulated at the same time, its been impossible to ever feel enough pleasure from the gspot alone. Why does this sound impossible to you? The glans clitoris is just like the head of your penis- how many men can cum without touching the head of their penis? Not many i know would prefer to have the base of their penis stroked.
I've seen thousands of porn and in nearly every mainstream porn video no matter how fast, hard or the angle of the cock in them- they don't have an authentic orgasm.
Your analysis of it being purely psychological is ridiculous because most women i know cant do it either. My mom agrees that sex feels good and she can orgasm apart from sex but has never in her life had an orgasm from sex. I masturbated a lot as a teenager and never had it happen even when trying. You are taking out the physical nerve bundles that play a huge role in orgasming.
I have a hood that is very tight and nearly adhered, just the thickness of the hood alone prevents me from feeling much so i have to retract it as much as possible. Nerves and receptors from the clitoris, up the spine and to the brain can be varied in their responses from woman to woman.
I dont know how most women who have had a lot of sex still have the same story i have and yet you are trying to categorize us as being deficient or have some psychological problem. I'm very content with my ability to orgasm. While most are multi orgasmic, im super multiorgasmic and i wouldnt trade that for the world.
A simple understanding of anatomy and physiology would more than explain how you can NOT feel enough stimulation through the wall of the vagina to reach clitoral orgasm from penetration. Like i said before, nature didnt put our clitoris glans inside our vagina, so why should we expect it to work like it is? Stroking your balls feels nice but it alone isnt going to make you orgasm either.
I dont like the attitude that women who cant orgasm from the inside have something wrong with them- i think the ones who can are obviously wired differently from the norm.
I know a lot of guys who cant cum through oral or handjobs but can through sex, vice versa. It's not just psychological. It's about pressure, rhythm and consistency. Hands get tired, mouths and hands get out of sync and mess up the build up to orgasm. This isnt rocket science.
Too hard, too deep or too angled penetration just plain hurts my bladder. Some of the suggestive techniques might work for your women but it isnt the magic key. How can someone get to orgasm if its irritating or hurting them? Obviously the nerves and sensations vary from person to person or people wouldnt be seeking out sex information and therapists to help them.
I've given a lot of oral sex and hand jobs and even the simplicity of men cant be summed up to one technique that works. Some guys cum from prostate stimulation, others cant even enjoy the anal stimulation. A guy who obviously enjoys this kind of stimulation can't say that the guy who doesnt is dysfunctional in his sexual abilities. Maybe his prostate isnt that sensitive or maybe its tender to touch.
Sorry this is so long but i know a lot about Obstetrics & Gynecology and i can tell you that there are plain and simple anatomical reasons why some women cant do this, they just cant. Anyone on here who knows me knows that i have awesome sex and foreplay. I'm not some woman who is paired with a guy who hasnt tried everything. He is not bothered one bit by me not cumming during sex. He knows that i'm thoroughly enjoying the experience so why mess with it if its not broken?
Also, i have been able to orgasm a handful of times during sex by using my vibrator on my clit. Honestly its so difficult to concentrate on the thrusting and the clitoris at the same time because he's so girthy. There is brain concentration needed to built up to the orgasm and when im feeling my vaginal walls get stretched to the max, its very difficult to feel the sensations on my clit enough to get to orgasm, even though it does feel good just not enough to push me over the edge.
If this doesnt explain thoroughly the reasons why I, and many other women cant do it and that its not that we simply choose not to let loose and relax enough to let it happen. There is no way you could please a partner of this variety if you can't accept these things.
I'm orgasmic and thats all that matters to us, how i orgasm doesnt matter as long as i get to regularly.
