Naked men together

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by nakedone, Nov 9, 2009.

  1. nakedone

    nakedone New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 10, 2009
    Messages:
    199
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    USA
    One thing I am learning from these threads is that there are very few places in this generation where men, and boys, can go naked together and not feel self-conscious or embarrassed.

    A few generations ago, it was considered normal and natural for men and boys to be naked in locker rooms, swimming pools, (including skinny-dippin' at farm ponds), even while just relaxing at home or while camping.

    This was, in my opinion, a very good thing, for boys were able to see the cocks of older men and see how they would probably develop. And where there were naked fathers and sons together, it was a part of the bonding process which is so necessary for father/son relationships.

    But that has disappeared, for the most part. Even in such places as the YMCAs there are usually two locker rooms, one for males over eighteen, and another for younger guys, who can still be accompanied by an older male, like a father or guardian. The reasons given are that most men don't like for younger guys to "look at them". But this avoids the main issue, and that is that young guys NEED to look at older men when they are naked. Our society is preventing them from benefiting from this time-honored practice.

    Another down-side of the situation which exists in the dual locker-room situation is that older men are free to go in where the younger guys will be naked. The big problem with this is that any older males who might be predators are in a setting where there are very few older males around to keep them under control.

    The situation should be reversed. Such facilities should have two locker rooms, but the primary one should be for all males, of all ages. And the second one should be for those men who truly do not want to be seen naked by younger guys. All the real amenities, like saunas and whirpools, should be in the first locker-room. The second should be only a bare-bones changing room.

    I truly believe it is a necessary part of a boy's growing-up and becoming an adult male to be in settings where males of all ages are naked together and are not self-conscious about who might see them naked.

    Does anyone agree?
     
  2. Industrialsize

    Staff Member Moderator

    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2006
    Messages:
    23,642
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    35
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Cape Cod, Ma USA
    Nope.......don't agree at all. I didn't have to be naked with my father to "bond" with him.
     
  3. Florida Boy

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2007
    Messages:
    1,342
    Likes Received:
    5
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    FL
  4. lionhorse

    lionhorse New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2009
    Messages:
    17
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Alabama
    I agree. I am trying to show my 7 y/o son that being naked with dad is no big deal.
     
  5. nedly32

    nedly32 New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 28, 2007
    Messages:
    84
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    syracuse ny
    right on the money, its no big deal
     
  6. D_Cleasby Clapworthy

    Joined:
    Oct 31, 2007
    Messages:
    55
    Likes Received:
    0
    I think its very, very rare that there will be some knid of pervert who will optionally go for the "under 18's" changing room on the chance that he can catch a glipmse of some younger guys or even kids, but yes, there is still a chance, it could happen everywhere.I think the more rational and practical way around things is to have a set up like at my local pool where you have one massive changing room that is split up into smaller rooms with part dividers. Family/ Adult only / School. I go for the adult only as you can be sure that there will be no kids running around, but families that are comfortable with it can go to there bit, if they arent then they can split up. However the showers are still in one big block so if you are gonna get your kit off to shower, everyone is gonna see you anyway. i wish my dad had been more relaxed about nudity because we never showered together or even saw him naked. Ive grown up to have a quite relaxed attitude about it though mainly because of being with naked with mates at school in showers and just the way we were with each other growing up. I dont think its healthy to grow up thinking nudity is a bad or unusual thing. By the time you are an adult you need to be compfortable with your body and others and be comfortable enough not to feel threatened by being naked infront of others.
     
  7. Stephenmass

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 24, 2008
    Messages:
    1,886
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    5
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Boston
    If your son sees you naked around the house, or at a gym or something while you are changing or showering or whatever, if it's not made to be a big deal, it's not a big deal. But I agree with Industrialsize, I didn't need to see my father naked to bond with him.
     
  8. AG08

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2008
    Messages:
    1,878
    Likes Received:
    35
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Canada
  9. piercedjobbie

    piercedjobbie New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2007
    Messages:
    281
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    florida
    I showered with my son when he was 4 years old until he was 9 or 10 - he wanted to be with his dad and it was no big deal to me or to him. I can't honestly say it was a bonding thing because I paid a great deal of attention to him as he grew up. Yes, he turned out just fine with no problems with nudity - boys, men or girls for that matter.
    As for the separate lockers/showers etc I'm inclined to believe that much of that set up is based on what the lawyers have told the owners.
     
  10. B_willy5904

    B_willy5904 New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 14, 2008
    Messages:
    261
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia - Home in the States visiti
    I agree. Nudity was never an issue in my parent's home or my home. I grow up in a very open family we were always naked around each other. My boys grew up the same way. There is a very social aspect to this that drives some people on this site nuts.

    The other weekend we had many of our family, extended family and friends out to our vacation home. One day all the guys went down to the men's spa to hang out for the day. We had 4 generations of men in our family there naked for hours just hanging out and socializing; My father, brother, son's, and grandsons & nephews. All together there were 16 of us ranging in age from 75 to 5. No one had any second thoughts about nudity, we all just see it as god given packaging.
     
  11. JTalbain

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2005
    Messages:
    1,812
    Likes Received:
    0
    I think that it is harmful to not allow men to see another men naked. In the gyms I go to they have recently started putting up partitions between showers, changing rooms in the locker rooms, and one even went so far as to wall up the entrance to the sauna so the entrance could be from the pool, which forced everyone to wear a bathing suit. I think that the primary focus on this is usually homophobia. Some people complain very loudly about other men looking at their junk.

    What I find disturbing about this is that the few who are very vocal about this effectively impose their opinions upon everyone else. I think that if you can't stand to be naked in a place where nudity is permitted, you probably shouldn't be there.

    As to why I think this is harmful, men are no longer secure about there bodies nowadays. Plastic surgery, liposuction, etc. are heavily on the rise among men in America. On top of that, installing dividers, shower stalls, changing rooms, and even partitions between urinals sends a clear continuous message to everyone that being naked or being seen exposed is not okay.

    One time I had someone ask me what I would do if another man hit on me. I told him I would say I wasn't interested. The stunned look on his face spoke volumes; it had never occurred to him that this could work. Unfortunately, that seems to be the case for most men nowadays.:frown1:

    I did fib a little to my friend, however, seeing as how I'm bi. But still, picking someone up in the locker room because you like the look of their genitals strikes me as more than a little shallow. It's kinda like walking up to a top heavy girl and saying, "Nice tits. Wanna fuck?"
     
  12. D_Jared Padalicki

    D_Jared Padalicki Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Messages:
    8,107
    Likes Received:
    1
    If I read this, I only can say that this happens more in the USA then here.
    Guys under the age of 18 are also allowed in the lockerroom here. Nudity isn't really an issue here in the lockerrooms.
    But I don't need nude quality time with my father to bond.
     
  13. finsuptx

    finsuptx New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 18, 2006
    Messages:
    405
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    I'm sorry, it just makes me uncomfortable to think of men showering with boys. If its father son, I can understand circumstances, and even parental choices may force it to occur. I never had a desire to be naked in the same room with my dad. We had a great relationship. I do not feel like showering with your son is the same image as Andy and Opie walkin' down to the fishin' hole.