new gf new problems

[BS76]

So the new gf and I are talking after sex and she lets slip that she was once with a guy so big she tore a little. I asked how big was the guy was and she gestures, so basically about 7" around and a good 9" long. This normally wouldn't bother me since she was bound to have had some bigger guys in her past like I've had some tighter women. However, I guess because I was cool about it she felt secure to go a bit further and said that bigger is better since it hits all the right areas, granted that there is a thing as too big like some guys are too small. That's what bugs me most, which I know for a fact since we've played with toys, one of which she couldn't get enough of which she had faster, harder orgasms with than just with me. I guess I'm just venting more than anything, but I don't understand why she'd say this stuff and could use some ideas on how to handle this.

 

[ThatFellaUK]

She's your girl, in the interest of honesty it's fine that she's admitted she's had big dick before. But bringing it up more than once - knowing how big you are - regardless of why just makes her sound like a bitch.

Find it hard to believe there's many guys out there that'd appreciate their women going on about the bigger dicks they've had in their past.

 

[thisrighthere]

I have a few points of advice...

Women enjoy large penises largely due to the 'fantasy' factor like, wow is it really that big? They do prefer smaller cocks, as it is more fun to work with. Not every girl wants their brains fucked out every night, but everyone has a right to some exploring.

Women ALSO, will say things of this nature just to mess with you psychologically. I know a girl who seen my junk via photo I sent to her friend (I'm 7" girth as well), and JUST to go on a power trip, she called it "small" and claimed her boyfriend was "12 inches, and thicker than a soda can" (complete BS based on the circumstance! Trust me!)

I called her out on how improbable that was, but she still lived in that lie just to be a bitch. I truly believe that women have trouble estimating size as they work mainly with the creative side of their brain, and not the logical side. (Not meant to be derogatory in any sense)

Just go with the flow, be confident in your own sexual prowess, and realize that it won't be on the forefront of her mind. Its about caring for the woman and going OUT of your way to do things for her to make her feel good. You aren't going out of your way to make someone feel good just because you are well equipped. Good news is, she is your girl, and your way ahead of the guy who was bigger than you because you have that girl, not him.

 

[Thirdlegproduction]

If it is to mess with you, I'd reply with an evenly snarky comment.

"All my other exes had bigger boobs then yours, but maybe they'll grow anyway" or "you're the first woman I liked for the inside rather than the outside"
You get the message.

In the beginning of a relationship it usually is a form of powerplay to test what kind of man you are and how much power she has over you.
Not a conscious thing often but it still happens.

 

[nirvana84]

I have the same thing with my GF, I am an average 6inches and she has told me how she has had some huge cocks which she loved and one she was not even able to fit in. It doesnt bother me too much, being average inkow there is a lot of guys out there with much bigger penis but at the same time some with smaller. Dont get me wrong I would love a bigger penis but meh. She said bigger is better other than the one which couldnt fit in, so i bought her a 10 inch dildo which i fuck her with while licking her out when she craves a big cock. I have been with her a year now and pretty sure i'm satisfying her enough otherwise whe would be gone by now.

 

[185248]

Go out buy a 9 x 7, or bigger dildo, bring it home, introduce it to the gf and have some fun. ^^^^ Just saw this, what he said.

 

[Young]

Haha... go for a virgin next time. Won't have none of this stuff then.
Maybe some people don't mind being compared to others but I personally do, would make me insecure. Unless of course I'm told that I am bigger then they were. I follow the principle "if you don't have anything nice to say, better not say anything at all". Pretty sure a girl won't like me telling her how my previous lovers were tighter and hotter then her, now would she? Unless people are into that turned on by humiliation... some people are. Not my cup of tea though.

 

[IntoxicatingToxin]

She's with you, isn't she? She's having sex with you, isn't she? She's having orgasms (isn't she???)?

So... what is there to deal with exactly? If she required bigger penis, she'd go get one. If she likes using that one toy that you have, let her use it. Use it on her. I know you want your penis to be the biggest, bestest, most powerful beast she's ever had plunging into her vagina, but you can't really control that and it isn't the case with this girl.

Talk to her, make sure you're doing everything you can to please her sexually, take any advice if she gives it, and don't freak out about this. She's with YOU.

 

[B_625girth]

hey. if she is enjoying and liking sex that's what's important. after my gf(now wife)and I had been together for a couple yrs. shes tells me one bf that was longer than me but thin. other guys she had sex with were nothing outstanding. I was easily the thickest cock she ever had, and the second longest. the first time we fucked, she had her first orgasm, and second. she told me this that nite. she was super excited on cloud nine. she wasn't faking or lying.
the night we talked about this she said I had the perfect cock, it was long but not too long, and she liked the "stuffed" feeling. she also said, she didn't get so sore that she didn't want any more. in fact, she said it usually made her horny, and that's why once we started fucking, we kept fucking. so enjoy the present, and forget the past. you weren't part of her past anyway.

 

[Enid]

So the new gf and I are talking after sex and she lets slip that she was once with a guy so big she tore a little. I asked how big was the guy was and she gestures, so basically about 7" around and a good 9" long. This normally wouldn't bother me since she was bound to have had some bigger guys in her past like I've had some tighter women. However, I guess because I was cool about it she felt secure to go a bit further and said that bigger is better since it hits all the right areas, granted that there is a thing as too big like some guys are too small. That's what bugs me most, which I know for a fact since we've played with toys, one of which she couldn't get enough of which she had faster, harder orgasms with than just with me. I guess I'm just venting more than anything, but I don't understand why she'd say this stuff and could use some ideas on how to handle this.

You were 'cool' about it, that's why she felt like she could be truthful. If it bothers you that much, then talk to her honestly about it. Making some snarky dig is very uncool.

 

[joyboytoy79]

I agree with Enid, and disagree with most of the boys who posted here. She's being honest with you. The least you can do is return the favor. If her being with some dude in the past makes you feel insecure, you should let her know that. And then you should listen to and try to understand her response. That's it. That's how it works. It's really that simple.

 

[BS76]

Ha

Haha... go for a virgin next time. Won't have none of this stuff then.
Maybe some people don't mind being compared to others but I personally do, would make me insecure. Unless of course I'm told that I am bigger then they were. I follow the principle "if you don't have anything nice to say, better not say anything at all". Pretty sure a girl won't like me telling her how my previous lovers were tighter and hotter then her, now would she? Unless people are into that turned on by humiliation... some people are. Not my cup of tea though.

That's the thing, she wasn't saying it to be mean IMO. I brought up the subject of size because I saw the difference in how she reacted to the toy and mentioned I know size is relative and that there's such a thing as too big and too small, that the key is to be a good match. That's when she dropped the bomb how the guy she was with was so big he tore her down there. I figured it was the end of it, but it wasn't drastic or anything as they apparently finished and she only realized there was damage as there was some blood after the fact. Really gets to me for some reason knowing some guy wrecked her like that. Had she said they tried, he put it in and she tore, and that was the end of it, no more sex with him ever, I'd probably had no problem with it.

 

[Phil Ayesho]

how about just growing the fuck up and being a man?

The Dick ain't what ANY woman evaluates you on if you are more than a one night stand.

they evaluate you on confidence... self assured, implacable, certainty that you know what you are about.

Maybe she and other women are not making this kind of comment to be bitches... maybe its a fast and reliable test to determine if you are one of those insecure whiney little boys who will fret about her prior experiences, will forever need her to buck up your fragile sense of self, and generally be more of an emotional drain, than a rock solid support in a relationship.


Women want strong men. And I don't mean your muscles.

So grow a spine and learn to truly not give a fuck about such things as how big some other guy might be.

Women don't dump guys over the size of their dick... they dump them over the size of their insecurities.

 

[kurios]

She is jerking your chain
I go with the earlier advice if size comes up, something a long the lines of
You are used to women with decent sized breasts but you like her the way she is.......

 

[D_vcfvcdhdr]

Some of you are idiots. Some of you are not.

I really wouldn't go with the insult retribution option. It makes you seem sad. I had an ex once who was super insecure about his sexual performance (the guy had trouble cumming.) I wasn't a dick about it or anything, but he felt so insecure that he eventually started body snarking- like making comments about my weight and shit, just to even the playing field. Needless to say, we didn't work out. I would never have remembered him as the guy with some sexual anxiety, but now I just remember him as that sad asshole that I avoided, thank God.

 

[D_Sal_Manilla]

hetero couples are so weird to me.

 

[gagagirl]

I really wouldn't go with the insult retribution option.

i totally agree. it sounds like she's insecure, or feeling anxious about getting what she feels like she "needs." I've been there, and I've hurt people's feelings before. I was being a selfish asshole. I think she needs to know that its hurting your feelings and that it's really up to HER how much satisfaction she gets from your sex life. it has very little to do with your size in the end.

 

[Young]

hetero couples are so weird to me.

RACIST!!! DISCRIMINATOR!! :no:

Nah just kidding. :tongue:

 

[Jillang]

I guess I don't understand why guys ask about our exes sizes anyway. Why would a guy think that asking that question isn't uncomfortable and awkward? And why would you really care how big her ex is? At least she didn't lie and was honest. That's a good quality, isn't it? If that guy was so great she would still be with him, obviously she is interested in you now. A big penis isn't a great relationship, a lot of things factor into a great relationship and you must have better potential than he does.

 

[rybkapipka]

So true, Jillang! I've never asked my girls about measurements of their ex (or what was their cars or hair style). This is totally not important for me. Relationship is not about penis sizes. In sex some girls like full penetration, some prefers gentle and sensitive fun. You need to accept this. If my actual girl would tell me that she's with me only because we have great sex - this will be an insult for me.