Sex after a hysterectomy

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by B_prettyswinggirl, Nov 19, 2010.

  1. B_prettyswinggirl

    B_prettyswinggirl New Member

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    No I haven't had one yet, but it's been an option I've been considering for the extreme pain during menses due to scaring and adhesions. I want to know if anyone has either had a hysterectomy and how it changed their sex life, or know's someone willing to share the info. I'm worried about losing the ability to have vaginal orgasms and the desire for sex. Thanks!
     
  2. RawDog

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    My wife had a total hysterectomy 3 years ago (she had Adenomyosis) and it was the best thing ever. She had horrible pains for years and the docs could never pinpoint the cause until 3 years ago. She has sex more now mainly because the pain's gone. She still has vaginal orgasms. In fact it gets stronger and stronger as the years go by.

    Getting through the menopause is still a pain. She still gets hot flashes and cold sweats. I can ask her more details if you have specific questions.

    Oh, and her deep spot/backstop orgasms are much more powerful now as well.
     
  3. Daisy

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    No change for me. If they remove the ovaries then yes, you will need hormones (bio-identicals) but physically..nothing for me.
     
  4. D_Rosalind Mussell

    D_Rosalind Mussell New Member

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    I'm 2 months post-op and I'm still figuring this stuff out myself. I also had a Total Hysterectomy (laparoscopic vaginal hysterectomy with bilateral salpingo-oophorectomy) because of bleeding problems (they ended up finding very early stage endometrial adenocarcinoma, therefore the complete removal...otherwise, was just supposed to be my cervix and uterus). Sex is definitely different, but it's too soon for me to make a call. I know I'm definitely tighter and I've lost some length inside. I know they say that it doesn't happen, but it did to me. Anyway, it's something I'm still mucking through it. I wish I could give you more information. I have more healing and experimenting to do before I can make a good judgment call, but I know I miss my cervix for having cds orgasms. Who knows, maybe when the top heals I'll be as lucky as Mrs. R and have crazy orgasms. :) Sex aside, I feel so much better now that I've had it done. Whatever you do, ask questions and make as informed a decision as possible. Keep us posted about it? I'm interested in how things turn out for you. :)
     
  5. haulthat

    haulthat New Member

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    I don't have a vagina so I will not try to suggest one way or another what to expect. I did however hear a woman on a radio show talking about how it ruined her sex life, her marriage, and her life for several years because of issues she dealt with after that took a lot of hormone treatment and other types of therapy to eventually improve. Her main issue is that the doctor who performed the surgery wanted nothing to do with her after it was done, mainly because she wasn't happy about it and she didn't feel he properly advised her of what may or may not happen as a result. Anytime something could have that big an impact on your life I would do some real research on it. This is an awesome site but... I don't think its geared towards this issue strongly enough to rely on solely. I just grabbed a few ones I saw that looked like they were related but I have no freaking clue how to judge one of those sites being better than another. I hope you stay healthy and happy!

    Hysterectomy - Recovery, Surgery, After and Side Effects
    Hysterectomy Support Discussions, Before Hysterectomy, After Hysterectomy, Recovery - HysterSisters
    Hysterectomy Support Group


     
  6. RawDog

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    I'll second haulthat's recommendation on Hystersisters. My wife posted there frequently before her operation too. Great bunch of supportive people there.

    Oh, and BBW36; my wife and I couldn't have sex for 6 weeks after her procedure. For a while after the 6 week period the recovery was still painful enough that sex understandably wasn't so high on her priorities. The fact that you can say what you're saying only 2 months after yours' is testimony enough that your road to recovery seems to be a lot quicker than my wife's.
     
    #6 RawDog, Nov 19, 2010
    Last edited: Nov 19, 2010
  7. D_Edwin Eatser

    D_Edwin Eatser New Member

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    Ex had a hysterectomy and after the recovery period we fucked just as much as before and she enjoyed it equally as much. She said it was a relief not having to think about pregnancy. She didn't have any emotional problems as she positively wanted the op.
     
  8. deedsforfun

    deedsforfun New Member

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    Oh boy. I usually leave these to the ladies, but feel I owe an opinion. I think if my memory serves correctly, it was a google search on this topic that led me to this site(the rest is history).

    Dont know exactly what type of histo you're looking at.
    But the wife had issues with uterus severly tilted and dropped after child birth. It caused bladder issues and sex wasnt painful, but when we got really wild I had to be extra careful not to hurt her deep inside.

    She finally did the partial after months of research. Sweety, its a gamble.
    My wife says shes VERY glad she did it. They took the cervix and the uterus and I cant tell ANY difference at all on feel from my end. Shes very sexual and wants it all the time. I cant throw enough dick at that women.

    That said, she still has her Ovaries(spelled right?) so that makes a difference.

    Do us a favor. Weigh your options heavily and DO NOT jump into this quickly.
    Many many many many women wish they had never done this as it ruined their sex lives.
    Now whats that mean. Well, Im as hardcore male hard dick as any of us, but I do understand that women work differently when it comes to sex(except for dim Aussie chicks heheh).
    So their sex lives could have been shitty anyway and histo had nothing to do with it. But there are those where they lost all drive etc, even from partials.
    Women store lots of hormones all over the place and its different for all of them.
    Really sit and weigh your options:
    Is the pain or problems bad enough to risk etc. Think about your sexual likes/dislikes and how/where your O's come from, cause it DOES matter.
    My wife really is glad, and so am I. No more monthly down times for me. Wild wild wild sex.

    But sure would hate to hear of another women having their lives ruined over this surgury. Make sure its a must! Lets not kid ourselves, we all know sex is a big part of marriage/relationships, and though its not everything, it can be a problem.

    Research the sugeon as well. I have read many reports where women were damaged badly by some prick who got over zealous and really ruined their lives. Ive read lots where the procedure can really make a difference. I mean I cant feel any difference when Im in there. They pulled hers out via Vaginal Procedure. Scary for me to even watch that demo. DAMN!
    But she says it wasnt that bad really.
    My wifes was done by a female(not that men cant, just sayin) and she had no complication.

    Hope things work out for you.
     
  9. cece

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    A hysterectomy unfortunately isn't a guaranteed solution to pain caused by scarring and adhesions (endometriosis). The surgery itself can cause internal scarring. I know a young woman in her early 20's who had a hysterectomy (her ovaries were left intact) but she continued to suffer tremendous pain daily, and during sex. She subsequently had her right ovary removed, and she's still in pain. It's a battle for her trying to manage her pain everyday. My mother had a total hysterectomy (because of fibroids & adenomysosis), and reacted badly to it. Her joints and muscled stiffened and she suffered excruciating pain throughout her body. For months, her doctor couldn't give her any answers. My mother later found out that she was suffering from fibromyalgia-in her case, possibly a post traumatic stress disorder triggered by her hysterectomy.

    I know a hysterectomy can be beneficial to a lot of women, but I thought I should let you know the flip side of it. Please feel free to PM me if you need to know more.
     
  10. B_prettyswinggirl

    B_prettyswinggirl New Member

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    I have alot to consider. Not taking anything lightly and considering all of my options. Thanks everyone.
     
  11. MrGoodDate

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    My wife had a hysterectomy some years ago. Everything removed. It too a while to get her energy back, but she then felt much better. Has had to take hormones. One thing not mentioned above,,, she has been quite dry since then and I have to use KY jell or somethng to get her wet and going.
    I always try to get her to have a good cumm first; then we join and work towards one together.
    Yummy!
     
  12. deedsforfun

    deedsforfun New Member

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    Good point. Mine was dry at first too. But I have to say that did correct itself. She gets as wet as she ever did now. Her Histo was back in Feb. Dont know if all get better but mine(wife) did.
     
  13. Chunkychick

    Chunkychick New Member

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    Personally - it changed my life for the better. I had it done abdominaly, they removed the cervix, but left the ovaries due to my age. Yes- it sometimes takes a little longer for me to get wet, but that's about it. Best thing I've ever done.
     
  14. D_Chesty_Pecjiggle

    D_Chesty_Pecjiggle Account Disabled

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    May I ask a stupid question: where does semen go when woman has a hysterectomy?

    Meaning when a woman has a vagina / uterus, it seems like that acts like a bag and catches the semen. What doesn't leak out is eventually absorbed.

    When the uterus is gone, do they kind of tie off things at the top of the vagina so more semen tends to flow out? Or does it just fly up & hit the outside wall of your stomach (kidding)

    Sorry -- just curious.

    And best wishes PSG, it sounds like a good thing for many of the helpful women here who've done it.
     
  15. deedsforfun

    deedsforfun New Member

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    I wondered same thing. You are right. Before, she'd orgasm and alot of it was sucked up by the cervix of a pulsing uterus, which is what its designed to do for conception.

    When they did the partial for the wife, there is no longer an outlet.

    You joked about it, but I have had a spit back. We had a long intense session one night, Id gone a couple days without and been teasing one another leading up with good sexting. I went deep to let off the load(just as she likes the warmth deep) and I just kept gushing. It was awesome and the last good spurt, it did come back out LOL.

    Not against my stomach, but i felt it come back out. And now, she returns nearly every drop I let go, as there is no where for it to go.

    But, it doesnt bother me or her the least so, who cares. If she doesnt want the mess, she swallows. Gotta love a good women:biggrin1:
     
  16. B_crackoff

    B_crackoff New Member

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    I've had sex with quite a few women who've had an hysterectomy.

    It's a self selecting group, but they said they were hornier than before, & several had had the whole shebang (!) tightened. Very wet, lots of orgasms, but I've no idea of the extent of the op.
     
  17. B_prettyswinggirl

    B_prettyswinggirl New Member

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    I loved the Hystersisters site! I appreciate all of the input. I hadn't even thought of further scar tissue being a possible problem. If I undergo this procedure it will be a full hysterectomy with ovaries removed also. Hormone replacement would be a necessity. I thank everyone for their support and hope by the time I see my gyn again in Feb I'll be able to make a good decision for me.
     
  18. Hippie Hollow Girl

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    I just had a hysterectomy on December the 18th, 2009. I had one due to fibroid tumors that didn't respond to treatment and were enlarging my uterus. I had a robotic partial hysterectomy. They just took out my uterus robotically and it was like day surgery. I am very happy not to have the pain of painful periods. Nothing has changed for me because I still have my cervix and my ovaries. I just don't have to deal with having the monthly periods that on me could last for a whole month. I haven't noticed a change in my sex drive or anything.
     
  19. Pitbull

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    My reply does not have anything to do with sex but complications.

    My mother had a hysterectomy and as a result has chronic bladder problems.
    It took decades to develop.
    Seems that the uterus helps to hold the bladder up.
    (Now I'm wondering what holds my bladder up - but that doesn't belong in "Women's Issues")
    So after years of not being in the preferred location, she has chronic cystitis and frequent urination and some control issues.

    Her surgery was done a long time ago and hopefully things have improved but that is one thing that you should discuss with OB/GYN and research.
    She gets up every hour or two - even at night to urinate. Last time she had a good nights sleep was when she had a catheter in.
    Never thought I would hear someone say how "Wonderful" a catheter was but nothing like a good nights sleep.
     
  20. Love-it

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    My wife had a hysterectomy after a pap smear came back with some cancerous cells, fortunately they didn't find any cancer in the tests after surgery. Her Dr. told her that she wound up with a shorter vagina due to some complication.

    I met a woman the other day who barely survived a robotic(?) hysterectomy where the procedure severed her femoral artery, according to her doctor she nearly died due to bleeding out, he was standing by during the procedure and managed grab the artery and sew it back together. She is now a textbook medical case for these type of procedures because her artery was not in the same position as other women.

    I am not trying to scare you but to make you aware that there can be problems.