threesome and penis dynamics

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by blakobra8, May 24, 2011.

  1. blakobra8

    blakobra8 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 2, 2009
    Messages:
    411
    Albums:
    6
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Los Angeles, USA
    So I have an opportunity to have a MMF with my girlfriend and a male friend of mine. I would like to, and my girlfriend has wanted to be DP'd for years. I am not much worried about a threesome having negative effects on our relationships.

    My only concern, which sounds silly, but could be serious, is that I do not know how big his penis is. I have a large cock, but I know that penis size can be a profound source of insecurity for some. I would feel bad about whipping out a much larger penis than his.

    So I need to figure out how big his cock is before the menage. We aren't close friends, but we are comfortable discussing sex, and I think we could enjoy being with a woman together. The most direct way to do this would be to hook up one-on-one, but I we are both mostly straight, and he is not my type anyway.

    We have talked about sex alot (as well as having a threesome with a girl), but I can't gauge how comfortable he is with his penis size.

    Do you think that I should just ask how big his dick is?
    Should I try to initiate some sort of male-bonding-penis-comparison-homoerotic thing ahead of time?

    Thoughts?

    PS: While I am fairly secure in my relationship with my GF, I would not be comfortable setting them up ahead of time and letting them fool around. Nor do I think she would particularly want this.
     
  2. Gecko4lif

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 10, 2010
    Messages:
    2,294
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Longwood, Fl
    Just ask him. Considering he already knows he will have to whip his cock out during the 3 some I think he would understand
     
  3. B_Hung Jon

    B_Hung Jon New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 4, 2007
    Messages:
    5,010
    Likes Received:
    1
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Los Angeles, California
    I don't see the point of having sex with someone who's not your type. Find some guy who you like and feel close to and then discuss it with your g/f .
     
  4. B_bi_mmf

    B_bi_mmf New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 28, 2008
    Messages:
    3,059
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    U.S.
    As long as your girlfriend responds enthusiastically to his cock, I'm betting he'll be just fine regardless of how he does or does not measure up next to you.
     
  5. killerb

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2007
    Messages:
    2,065
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    USA
    if he's game for a 3some, he most likely has no hangups about his size...

    i wouldn't give it another thought.
     
  6. marriedasian

    marriedasian New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 2, 2008
    Messages:
    587
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Wisconsin
    i agree...
     
  7. milbud29

    milbud29 Member

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2009
    Messages:
    77
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    agree. don't worry about it. Part of the fun of an MMF is sharing a girl with another guy, and you both know you're gonna see eachother's cocks during; so just go with it, have fun and everyone has what they have!
     
  8. vlls

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2008
    Messages:
    248
    Albums:
    3
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Victoria, BC
    i'd say it'd be fun to arrange something with him.... at least a jerk off session or smth like that... if hes up for it :) then ull see
     
  9. helgaleena

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2006
    Messages:
    5,665
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Wisconsin USA
    Don't see why you would feel bad about being larger than him. It's your girl, right? Only natural that you would want to stay dominant in some fashion over the auxiliary male. OTOH if you were hoping to be bottom, it could still happen with somebody smaller than you.

    I was recently editing a threesome erotic short MMF and the second man, not the boyfriend, was larger. It did nothowever threaten the relationship since they were such a confirmed kinky couple and the bf with smaller tool insisted on directing.
     
  10. ges

    ges New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 26, 2007
    Messages:
    230
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Cairns, Australia
    OMG, what happens if he's twice your size?
     
  11. blakobra8

    blakobra8 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 2, 2009
    Messages:
    411
    Albums:
    6
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Los Angeles, USA
    my girlfriend would probably end up in the ER with a ruptured spleen
     
  12. Not_Punny

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2007
    Messages:
    5,543
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    8
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    California
    Depends on how social you are with him. Before we have any "encounters of the third kind," we KNOW about the other guy's dick. My guy always checks for the other guy's size (they either show him or my guys asks).

    We wouldn't DREAM of going into a threesome situation without knowing something about cock size.

    Why is it so important?

    Because some guys just can't shut up about their size, or rather, lack of size. Their insecurity spoils the whole event.
     
    #12 Not_Punny, May 26, 2011
    Last edited: May 26, 2011
  13. Not_Punny

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2007
    Messages:
    5,543
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    8
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    California
    In other words, JUST ASK! You don't have to have sex with him to find out about his size. ASK! "How's it hanging?"

    Or, how about: "she's particular about her men friends, and wants me to find out more about your, uhm, masculinity...."

    (My guy usually "blames" it all on me)
     
  14. blakobra8

    blakobra8 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 2, 2009
    Messages:
    411
    Albums:
    6
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Los Angeles, USA
    may I ask what how you have handled protection (rubbers) in your various encounters? do you always use them? do you have your partners get tested? what is your general policy on contraception?
     
  15. fire77

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2011
    Messages:
    803
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    USA
    It boils down to how your girl behaves towards penis size, she could make it much more obvious and start some kind of friction between the two participating males or she can make them both happy by complimenting them about something other than their penis size.

    I had an encounter with the other guy a bit smaller than my husband's so I kept complimenting him about his eyes, cute butt and nice flat tummy which kind of balanced the moods for me to enjoy it.

    If you feel you need to know then simply just ask the other guy.
     
  16. areola

    areola New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2004
    Messages:
    39
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Glasgow, UK
    Being gay I'm not sure how MMF dp works but couldn't you discuss who is going to go in the ass or vagina? Or even what position would be best? Both would lead naturally onto the topic of size.
     
  17. dolfette

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2006
    Messages:
    11,911
    Likes Received:
    0
    if you ask him, or make hints, you are making penis size an issue. so even if he's usually perfectly happy to be the smaller man, suddenly he's going to feel really self conscious.

    will you knowing in advance make any difference to either your size or his? nope. so why bring it up?
     
  18. D_Balls Cezanne

    D_Balls Cezanne Account Disabled

    Joined:
    May 4, 2011
    Messages:
    304
    Likes Received:
    0
    The threesomes I've had with my wife and others prior to her have always been about fun. Don't make a big deal about size and it won't matter to anyone involved. When we had someone smaller it wasn't an issue as he had other facets to bring to the table. That was, after all, why we had invited him to the threesome. When I was smaller then I just got on and kept being myself.
    If a threesome is purely about size then just get a dildo - you can choose whatever size is perfect for the occasion. You also don't have to talk to it afterwards :)
     
  19. WatchStr8Sex

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 15, 2006
    Messages:
    235
    Albums:
    12
    Likes Received:
    1
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    West Footscray, Melbourne, Austraila
    If you are big don't worry - he's the one who has to measure up! 2 big dicks = great double fucking. if he is too small, you will force his cock out but even if he's 11" and you're 9", it will all still work magically
     
  20. Not_Punny

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2007
    Messages:
    5,543
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    8
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    California
    We are EXTREMELY picky about play pals.

    -- condoms only
    -- any single guy is tested
    -- married guys who are monogamous don't require testing if he and wife are healthy

    We don't play with "players" -- too risky.

    I know this sounds like we have tons of partners, but we don't. It's usually the "usual suspects," whom we know and can trust.