Wife wants to try a large cock!?!?!

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by youngdane, Aug 29, 2008.

  1. youngdane

    youngdane New Member

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    OK, here goes....my wife and I have been married for almost 18 years. We dated briefly in college, fell in love and were engaged and married in just over a the span of a year. She was and is absolutely HOT. I don't mean internet hot, but real life hot. Before we met she was a college cheerleader, did some modeling, was asked to be in Playboy, to be a beer spokesmodel, etc. She's pretty conservative and didn't really want to persue any of it. At 41 she still turns heads. I definitely married up.

    When we were dating, we shared our sexual pasts. She and I had about an equal number of partners. We talked about the people, circumstances, etc. I wanted to know (see reason why- #1 below) where I stood, so as she told me about an encounter, I would ask if the guy was big. She would say "he was small" or "he was skinny". I am 6.5x5.5 and am OK about my size. I've actually been told that I am big by a few. This was the first long term relationship for either of us.

    Several things have come to the fore that make me think that she would like to be (and I would LOVE it!) with someone really hung.

    1. While we were drinking and hanging out with one of her girlfriends, she mentioned a guy she knew of in high school whose friends called him 'moby 'dick' and that he was hung nearly to his knees. this guy dated another acquaintance of hers. She was told by his ex-girlfriend that "girl, he would split you in two!" To me, this implies that she said that she would like to try him, or someone his size to provoke that sort of response. She brought this same subject up while drinking no less than two more times in the span of a year. I know she never hooked up with this guy.
    2. One time years ago we were on vacation and went into a sex shop to look around. She was too embarassed to pick out a toy, so once we got back to the hotel, I offered to go back and pick something out. I'm apparently a bad judge of size and picked out something that was a little large about 8x6. We tried it and couldn't get it to fit all the way without lube, but when I asked her how it felt, she said that she would be screaming (in pleasure) if she could have made it fit. I confessed to her that I'd love to see her fuck a real cock that size. She was embarrassed and told me that I was all she wanted, but she was really turned on and the sex was great. I brought it up several times over the years with mixed results-sometimes she woul get a little upset that I would think that way, other times it would give her multiple O's when I would weave it into our play.
    3. Big cock #1-I found out from a friend of hers that my wife hooked up with a guy in high school who was really well hung. She didn't do anything with him, but did pull his cock out and left the room. Her friend later tried to fuck him and couldn"t get him to fit! I had heard these stories seperately, so when I put two and two together and told my wife the story about her friend and how hung the guy was, she blushed and couldn't look me in the eye.
    4. Big cock #2-Finally about six months ago, while having sex, I asked her if she had ever been fucked by a big cock (as I have on several occasions, always answered with a "no") . To my surprise, this time she answered with a low, whispered, "yesssss". When I pressed for details, she got increasingly angry. I wanted to know who it was and she was reluctant to share details, the reason being is that she told me while we were sharing about our pasts that she had hooked up with this guy but not slept with him. I had caught her "omission" and I admit that I was hurt by it. I think she was embarrassed to tell me at that early stage in our relationship simply because he was hung. It didn't hurt me that he was hung. It hurt me that she hid the encounter from me. I cant begrudge her for any of it-it happend before I knew her. Admittedly now this is a huge turn on for me.
    Now, since all of this has come out, I have explained that if it would be pleasurable for her that she should find a well hung lover on the side. She has seen and experienced bigger. As long as the relationship is physical and safe, I have no problem with it. Her pleasure is extremely important to me. I would also like to have an MMF or MMFF with her. She likes when I mention the idea of doing a DP.

    Sometimes she says she doesn't think bringing someone into our bed is smart, but other times (when aroused) she is all for it. I really want it to happen.

    In closing-I am not a cuckold waiting to happen, I do not want to be dominated in any way and do not consider my self small or weak. I really am ok with my size. I AM, however, fascinated by watching my wife respond physically to a huge cock. I love my wife and am committed in the extreme to giving her the ultimate sexual experience, whatever that may be for her.

    Sorry for a "War and Peace" post. I really could use advice from anyone who has been in this situation of trying to expand upon their married sex life.
     
    #1 youngdane, Aug 29, 2008
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2008
  2. Honey123

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    Have you considered that your wife might be sounding like she's all for it during sex because it turns you on? If she is not open to it out of bed that is very likely that she agrees during sex because she likes how it turns you on but pushing for it to happen in real life could severely damage your relationship. Pestering her for details about the one large cock that she is now saying she has had may also be hard on her.

    One of the things that goes with being a conservative woman is a sense of moral decency. There are some things that no matter how sexy they sound in the moment of passion would ever actually be possible for us to do in real life. AND those times that we go against that natural barrier of properness, we often regret it.

    I'm a church going Baptist woman. I've been divorced for 5.5 years and have only slept with one man and fooled around (naked, no penetration) with two others. That's it. I could never be with 2 men at the same time, no MFM or FMF, no DP or cuckolding, and I could never cheat. Even my photos are more flirtatious and provocative than sexual. I talk and flirt a lot but that's pretty much as far as it goes. Now, if I had a long term relationship that would be another story and I'd wear him out often.

    You've got a good thing going there with her. Don't mess it up by bringing another person into your bed. Honor your wife's wishes and just keep it fantasy.
     
    #2 Honey123, Aug 29, 2008
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2008
  3. D_Della Doubledees

    D_Della Doubledees New Member

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    Sometimes I like my fantasies to STAY that way.... it's hotter to me to imagine what they'd be like than to actually do them. Some, I have waited to experience, and when I finally did... they were amazing.... OTHER TIMES... not-so-great.

    I think this is your wife's call, and if you are extremely open with her, you can put it on the table and let her make the call. Be EXTREMELY sure that this is what you want, because there can not be any jealousy involved, and with MANY of these situations, feelings of betrayal seem to get in the way... whether it's warranted or not.

    Your wife may be extremely turned on by the FANTASY of it, but she may not be all for the REALITY. It's nothing against you, and it's also not necessarily because she's afraid of upsetting you if she agrees. She could have her own reservations and her own reasons... and like I said, SOME FANTASIES are better than the real thing.

    The best thing to do is TALK OPENLY about it. Be honest about your intentions. If it's YOUR fantasy... then OWN it as yours when you bring it up. There's nothing wrong with that. Tell her what your fantasy is, and that if she's ever interested, you would like to talk more about it.... when SHE is ready.

    If you REALLY think SHE would like it, and you'd like to do it for HER....you have to convince her that WITHOUT A DOUBT she is SAFE, and your marriage and relationship are safe. The only way to do this is to reassure her that there is no jealousy or point-proving involved in this endeavor. This may not be achieved with ONE conversation. It may involve several, in which she is collecting information, gauging your reaction, and becoming more sure of the safety level in the proposed situation.

    She also needs to know what you're getting out of it, too. She may not agree to it, if it's only for 'HER'. If it also TRULY gets you off, chances are, she'll want to do it more, because it's NOW an experience that you're sharing as a couple, and that intimacy is VERY important for a woman.
     
  4. D_Della Doubledees

    D_Della Doubledees New Member

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    .... and going along with this.... If your wife is not receptive to the conversations, Honey123 is right about not pestering your wife. Put it on the table once so the ball is in her court, and if SHE brings it up again, it's on her terms.

    My comments about having 'several conversations to reassure her of her safety' are dependent upon her being receptive to it... rather than passive or dismissive.
     
  5. B_ScaredLittleBoy

    B_ScaredLittleBoy New Member

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    What you are doing is forcing your own insecurities and insecurity-related turn ons onto your wife.

    If your wife was as into big cocks as you wish or imply she was, she'd have divorced you and/or cheated on you by now.

    I am not religious in any way. But what is the point in getting married and then basically whoring your wife out to guys with big cocks? Or fantasising about it. Or pressuring her into it. Is that love in the 21st Century?

    If a girlfriend was pestering me about previous girls' breast size or vaginal tightness, I'd find it very weird and after a time I would stop seeing her.

    Now even if you did force or coerce your wife into this cuckold situation, threesome/cuckold trysts are not known for cementing relationsips. The chances are quite high that:


    • Your wife will leave you for the stud with the bigger cock.

    • You will become jealous of the stud with the bigger cock, and your jealousy will grow to the point where it becomes unbearable and your marriage is ended.

    • Your wife will stay with you, but will secretly see the stud with the bigger cock. She could become pregnant by him, or catch an STD/AIDS which she could then pass to you.

    • She may get a 'taste' for big cocks and find a series of guys with big cocks and be seeing multiple guys why you are at home jacking off over the thought of your wife being with bigger guys.

    • The relationship may become stronger and you might after a time forget about the time you let the stud in your bed. Probably not.
    Those are some of the risks. Is it worth it?

    But before you get to that stage I think you should ponder how you pushing the cuckold issue might be negatively affecting your marriage and personal relationship with your wife.
     
  6. LilCuckHubby

    LilCuckHubby Member

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    This was a fantasy my wife and I shared for a few years. She was brought up in Catholic schools so had little exposure to guys and was a virgin when we married. Once we started watching porn she became curious and very turned on when she would see a guy with a large cock. I wanted her to have sex with another guy as much as she did but I did not push her into it. She is actually the one who initiated sec with another guy when the opportunity arose and we both loved it. We lived the lifestyle for over 20 years and had a lot of fun!!
     
  7. THEDUDEofDestiny

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    goddamn you, you have a woman that loves you. let go of this weird hang up before someone gets really hurt.
     
    #7 THEDUDEofDestiny, Aug 29, 2008
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2008
  8. Honey123

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    Love your advice - well said.
     
  9. B_bigbanana

    B_bigbanana New Member

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    Youngdane,
    You are a weirdo. Personally, I don't think much of what you say is true. The stories you tell seem absurd and totally fantasy or something you wish would happen. Including pictures of yourself AND those of your wife's 'lovers'. Get a life and take your self-depreciation elsewhere, please. Sad.:frown1:
     
  10. youngdane

    youngdane New Member

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    I appreciate the constructive feedback. I laid this out as honestly as I could with nothing held back. There is no fiction here.YES, this does turn me on. I am certain that it does for her as well. We just have to determine if it would work for us together in reality.

    I think for me the turn on would be as much breaking the routine, or seeing her with someone else as it is the "big cock" thing.
     
  11. econocook

    econocook Member

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    My wife and I have gone through the identical situation. We ended up setting her up w/ a guy on the web and she met him and sucked him off. Since then things have been cool and we still have fun talking about it. Things are better than ever and it didn't hurt our relationship. She enjoyed it but essentially did it for me, not herself. She still loves the feel of a big cock (needing a dildo of large dimensions fairly often) but isn't into meeting people and making it real. I guess I lucked out. I still wish we could do that kind of stuff every once and a while to spice things up.

    I don't think these fantasies/turn ons are too odd or rare.
     
  12. lgej

    lgej New Member

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    My wife and I use a lot of sex talk about her with another well-endowed black man, usually with the idea of my DP-ing her in the ass while she takes his big cock in her pussy. I'm the only man she's ever had...I'm 99.9% certain because I believe her and we've been together constantly since I took her virginity. Don't think she's even seen (live) or touched another cock. But talk and viewing porn (and using toys) is where it ends. We both enjoy it and consider our bedroom with just the two of us in it to be a "safe environment" where we can say and do anything to and for each other with mutual consent. In our calmer moments, we agree completely that the bedroom is for fantasy and our reality is a monogamous one. Frankly, this level of fantasy excitement gives us such a rush that every time we're together sexually (at age 60 and at least twice a week) is almost like the first time. Our orgasms are shattering and exquisite. My experienced, monogamous, 40+ year exclusive relationship advice is keep it fantasy. Too much risk in the reality of it. I think by being creative and by using your imagination, you get the best of both worlds...the excitement of fantasy with a safe and secure reality as its "wrapper." Peace!
     
  13. Jasper72

    Jasper72 New Member

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    AGREED!

    btw, MMF usually means the MM will play together. I think you meant MFM?
    (and MMFF applies, too, play between the same sexes on both sides)

    I was in a threesome relationship for a while with some friends. It started off as a joke between us one night that lead to some fun times, and did I ask them both if they were sure before we proceeded further. He deferred to her the first time, but whenever we played, I did ask again. It wasn't an "every time" thing whenever I was over, but a handful of isolated instances over several years. And SHE was the one who decided to end that part of our relationship, later on. (and was the instigator of the end of the relationship later on for other reasons. I stepped out so they could work on their relationship.)
     
  14. B_capslock

    B_capslock New Member

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    It seems pretty invasive the way you grill her about big cock.
    .. If a women kept grilling me about big breasts... making me feel guilty just fore the existence of large breasts out there is stifling
    ... You should knocked it off and enjoy your wife or go out and get fucked in the ass to resolve your own fettishes!
     
  15. youngdane

    youngdane New Member

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    Correct-MFM
     
  16. youngdane

    youngdane New Member

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    This has been a DIALOG between us for 14 years now

    Not trying to make her feel guilty. Quite the opposite. I'm trying to let her open up about something she possibly desires.

    I already do

    Nope, sorry you are miles away from understanding where I'm coming from on this.
     
  17. idaho69

    idaho69 New Member

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    I've had experience with swinging and it can work, but it can also ruin a relationship. Definetly high risk behavior.

    You're getting a bit carried away with this talk about her finding a lover on her on. You need to can that idea.

    You might try going with a threesome as long as you don't have to push her into it. If you have to push, bag it. If you have to push for anything, bag it.

    I think a big risk here is your getting too focused on sex with others and loosing interest in just sex with your wife. Keep that in mind.

    So, keep the big picture in perspective - what you have now and what risk you are taking that might compromise it. Think before you act.

    Keep us posted.
     
  18. CALAMBO

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    dude...asking your wife to service another cock???...very risky behavior, you seem to want it more than she...keep fantasy separate from your real life..you seem to have it all...try sharing more porn to give the excitement you seem to need...else starting over could be in your future....that is a lonely road you may not enjoy
     
  19. B_capslock

    B_capslock New Member

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    Yeah, this is your wife you are talking about... You say you are trying to help her "open up", but instead you seem controlling and trying to force her to fuck some donkey dick for your own amusement, really. I mean if I really wanted to please my wife snausage-wize, I'd get a large dildo ore a pee-pee extender to please her. bring in another person is more than just about her exploring her own curiosities. hence why I think that you want your ass stuffed like a thanksgiving turkey, farting come across the room ! "Pffffft...SPLAT!"
     
  20. jjsuperbird

    jjsuperbird Member

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    I just stumbled across this thread and find it very interesting. Youngdane, thanks for posting the question and thanks to all the members of LPSG for sharing your thoughts. The "S" in LPSG stands for Support and it is in that spirit that I want to contribute to the dialogue.

    I have been happily married for 28 years. My wife is good looking (honey123 your photos are great and remind me of some of my wife's best features :wink:). I have been faithful to my wife for all of our three decades together, and we have a happy healthy sexual relationship.

    Like Youngdane, I am comfortable with my size and know that I perform well in the sack and satify the love of my life. But... I too have the same fantasy.

    My wife knows about my obsession with big penises and sexual prowess ... she sometimes helps me get off by role playing and telling me 'big dick' stories. but it is my fantasy it is not her fantasy.

    If your wife is willing to help indulge you with stories and role playing that might be a good compromise. If at some point she is willing to go further that is between you and her... if she isn't interested in actually doing the act then you shouldn't push. Like any good lover, you should try to find ways to satisfy one another without pushing beyond the other partner's comfort zone.

    I hope I don't sound too pedantic or preachy...

    Asking her to help you talk out a fantasy or 'pretend' as part of your foreplay or 'pillow talk' might be a good compromise ... It works for me :biggrin1:

    I like to write erotic fiction and have posted a number of 'large penis' stories in the fictitious stories section of LPSG. Feel free to print one or two of them and show them to your wife. tell her you 'get off' on this type of fantasy story. If that is too direct maybe just leave the stories lying around the house and when she 'discovers' them you can open up the conversation about your fantasy and tell her you like stories about well endowed men satisfying their lovers. Then, the next time you are having sex, remind her of the fantasy stories and how much it makes you hot! As a good lover she might "help you" with your fantasy... as you should help her enjoy her fantasies.

    Inviting her to help you with the fantasy might be a good compromise and keep your sex life fun and safe.

    Just a thought.

    JJ