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Attraction to certain races= Racism?

So this is sort of a follow up to my post about seeing racism first hand, of course all moral and reasonable people can agree racism is wrong, what about dating and relationships? If your only attracted to someone of your race or a certain race, is that discrimination?

Now I would not say this in public but for the most part I am attracted to other white people. With women it's a bit different and I find they are many exceptions, I see some women of different races that I'm attracted to, but for the most part I'm attracted to white women. Though I do find half Asian and half white women the most gorgeous people on the planet. I don't think this makes me racist, more like preferences. Especially if I think the most gorgeous women are half of a race that I am not part of.

When it comes to men,I'm solely attracted to other white guys. I see Asian guys or black guys whom I think are good looking, but I'm not attracted to them. I think this is ok, as long as I'm not generalizing. Like I'm not saying because i'm not in to black guys, so therefore they are not attractive etc. But sometimes I feel like society has so many hang ups from our racist past, that saying anything about race can be considerd racism.

Maybe those out there who are attracted to any person despite their race are more enlightened, but me being bi-sexual may trump that :wink:. Then again they are probabally those out there who are attracred to just about anyone despite race or gender. I guess they would be the most enlightened of us all....... or just the sluttiest.

Comments

Bbucko
It's not racist to have preferences, but absolutes are really limiting.

I have long said that my favorite flavor of men is Latino: we are polarities in looks, temperment and culture and complement each other nicely. Recognizing that is not discriminatory. But if you categorically exclude a group of people from any consideration ever, I'd question my motivations if I were you.
 
goodwood
Attractions and preferences are not racist in any way - imo.
As far as physicality goes - everyone has a preference of who they find attractive.
I have known Japenese people that are absolutely and only attracted to other Japenese people.
I know people both men and women that are blonde/blue that are only attracted to others of the same.
Everyone likes something and there is no shame in admitting what you are attracted to and again, i think it is not racist.
I have preferences of women i am attracted to physically, but if a woman outside of my 'ideal' is an amazing woman, her looks or race are irrelevant.
Good question though. I have wondered the same thing and have asked it and had it asked of me many times.
In the end, we like who we like.
 
D_Ivana Dickenside
i understand what you mean by bringing out this topic. since i'm asian and the men i've dated in the past were all not asian, people often thought i was racist or that i excluded asian men from my dating pool. however, they couldn't be more wrong. people of different backgrounds mix so much that it's a totally normal thing, even when it comes to preferences of the type of person an invidiual is attracted to. of course there are still people of a certain background who are strictly attracted to other people of their same background. there's nothing wrong with that either. but to say that it's racist to be attracted to one background more than the other, that's just bogus!
 
bigboy9239
interesting....I love the look of latinas and black women...BUT only the ones with that sweet cinnamon complexion...and long black hair. Is it racism? I don't think so...I'm black...but have always been attracted to that coloring.. whether they are latina or black or Mediterranean white.
 
H
Nope... everyone is attracted to some physical type, and being attracted to or not attracted to someone of a particular skin color really isn't any different than having an attraction (or not having one) to tall or short men/women...

I think racism (or other isms) enter into it when a person thinks along these terms: "I'd never get involved with a _____ person, because they're dirty!" or "blacks, whites, asians aren't good enough for me, because they're inferior", etc.

It can get a little dicey when a person is staunchly against dating someone of their own race sometimes. I know some cases where a person is genuinely just not attracted to men/women from their own race... but I also know some cases here there is some self-hate going on too.
 
P
It's not racism its a matter of taste. I was raised to believe everyone was equal. Although my family were always more excited when I dated a black guy. I used to date men outside my race, and even married one. My personal prefence is tall, blond, blue eyes. I don't know why, I just like it.
 
goodwood
this is a great discussion and i am happy to read that people are sensible and honest enough to say that they like what they like. there is no racism in liking what you like. with any luck, someone will like me. someone will like you. and we certainly will not call that person or people racist.
 
quert
i think it's cool that so many people are jumping in on this topic since it can be kind of controversial. i agree too that people like who they like, and ultimately that's what matters for any one person. so for me, it's not even about whether it's racist or not. but i do see a difference in just having preferences and having prejudiced ideas that influence your preferences. on one hand, let's say you look around a crowded room and see a bunch of people, and you happen to be attracted to people of the same race, or not be attracted to people of some race. that's totally fine. but imagine you walk into a room full of people and you only bother to notice the black people, or the asian people, or whatever. to me, that's a little different. in the first case, you look at each person and decide whether or not you're attracted to her or him. in the second case you don't bother to really even look at them. you just notice their race, and then you don't go any further.

and i guess that doesn't really matter, as long as you still treat people nicely. but i've met too many people who are are, well, kind of rude to people they don't find attractive. and if those people aren't attracted to a group of people, then they end up just being rude to a that entire group of people. and that ends up looking like racism even if it's not what they intended.
 
D
I agree with Bbucko and the very good point of h8r4life.

I like thin, tall white guys with big cocks and long, lustrous hair. But that does not stop me from liking and desiring others by any means.

I also like dark eyes and dark hair but other combinations are equally fetching. They might not be the first I see because of my own internal dialogue but they are no less appealing.

I see beauty in all sorts of men. But I do not frown at those who do not. Attraction is personal, subjective and shaped by a number of factors.

I won't say I am 'enlightened' ;) I just like all the yummy cookies in the jar.
 
J
I find I have a fetish for having sex with guy and girls of any race but with males do have a strong desire for asians. Love their bodies.
 
Principessa
I've posted many times on this site about my predilection for white boys. :redface: I usually get slammed for it which irks the hell out of me. Black men date white and Asian women all the time and nobody says anything. :mad: Let a sister start dating a white man and heads spin around to look at you like :wtf: I tend to like the darker skinned brothers than the light skinned ones. I'd much prefer a Bernie Mac type guy over a Terence Howard
.
Anywho, I find lots of black guys physically attractive. It's just that when they start talking I realize I have nothing in common with them other than the color of our skin. :redface: I grew up in an upper-middle class white neighborhood and I relate better to those people with a similar upbringing. I don't think that makes me racist. Elitist maybe, but not racist. :wink::tongue:
 
blacktightfit
I don't think it is racist to have a preference. I am typically attracted to white men. It becomes racist when you exclude whole groups of men from your dating pool solely based upon race. Just because I am attracted primarily to white men, it doesn't mean that black, hispanic, or asian men are not attractive and are excluded from my dating pool. I have met many a white guy who will tell me straight up they are willing and able to fuck me, but they will never date me because I am black. Or people who claim they have never found a person of another race sexually attractive.

Often when I run into people like that, I do think that the history of racism, in particular in America has played into the factors of why they exclude whole races of people. People have used religion and stereotypes to cite why they can't date someone of a different race, and to me that is racist and pathetic. Not all white people are the same, so why would I assume asian, blacks, or hispanics to all be the same.

I also think that societal ideals of beauty also play into this as well.
 

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