I never heard the term "side" until recently. When people would ask if I was a top or bottom, I'd respond with submissive top. I'm definitely more "submissive" in nature; I like when someone takes control and my kink interests (bondage and feet) certainly lean more towards the submissive end. With penetrative sex, I've only ever been a top. But, I think the term side fits me better. I'm not against penetrative sex, but I realize I don't get as much enjoyment as I do with other things. I've realized that with exploring my kinks, and just my sexuality in general, it's never been about penetrative sex. I want to be tied up and teased' I want to be under someone's feet. I love getting sensual massages and having my body explored. I just find the touching and teasing associated with all of these things so much more exciting than penetrative sex. I'll take making out and getting off first any day of the week. If someone else is getting me off, I'd rather he use his mouth, hands, or feet. This isn't any new revelation for me, and I know the term side isn't new. But it's something I just discovered, and having a word that explains these feelings is nice. I've always felt strange in that I was never really excited about penetrative sex. It's not something I'll stop (I think that would end my marriage
). But it's nice to feel a little more comfortable with myself.