Decided On Coming Out! I have some questions?!

So just a little backround info:
I'm a 19 yr old college student. I'm middle eastern, Muslim raised so this is gonna be the prettiest Outting.

Anyways. So I haven't come out yet because growing up i always thought I was just bi, but being around my gay friends, its opened my eyes, (especially my friends that have been together for 5 years) I see what they have, and i know i could live my life with a women and be happy but i want more and deserve more. So since I've been enlightened i know what would truly make me happy and i'm going to pursue it. I'm not scared of coming out, I'm self confident, intelligent, and a great person and if people don't wanna except the fact that i'd like to live my life with a man then they can go and fuck themselves. =)

So I just kinda said all that because i wanted to make it clear, the coming out doesn't give me fears or anxieties, more like anxiousness and happiness.
My problems lie in what order to tell people and how to tell them... For example should i walk up to my friend and be like, " hey buddy i'm gay " i know he wont care but idk how to say it.

I figured id ask, maybe for some tips and hints. People have gone thru this so why not learn from there mistakes. That just seemed like the most logical thing to do.

Comments

Telling your friends and family is different from person to person. I seem to always wait until either someone asks before I tell them I'm bi or wait until I can work it into a conversation without it being awkward or weird, like if I'm watching a movie or something with a friend and a cute guy is in it I may make a comment about it. Good thoughts and energy to you :) Hope for all the happiness you deserve
 
First, coming out is a brave, impressive step that you deserve to take the time to be proud of. Its not every day people grow to understand who they are and what it will take to make them happy. As for mistakes, there's no "wrong" way to do this. There are ways that might go better for you than others, as only you know your life and the people in it. Expect some conflict, expect some confusion, but generally be hopeful that the people who want to understand you and love you for who you are will still continue to do so. I wish you the very best of luck.
 
don't come out on any religious day or a holiday where the family is together celebrating. there is stress on these days (allot of times) and, it will probably not go well.

holidays
birthdays
weddings
funerals
etc.
 
Congratulations, and good luck! I think you'll discover that most people won't be as shocked, disappointed or rejecting as you may have feared. It sounds like you're well on your way to feeling comfortable telling people what is essentially a part of yourself, not the central, defining characteristic that is the only prism through which people will see you.
 
Congratulations on finding your true self, and pursuing it. Remember, the only person you HAVE to really come out to is yourself--everybody else is determined by whether or not they are important, and a big enough part of your life, to share this personal detail with. I have found the best way is to not do it in some dramatic fasion. Homosexuality comes up from time to time with just about everybody, and it provides a segue to allow you to make the statement. Then you just say "Just to let oyu know, I'm gay." Then unless they and you really want to discuss it in more detail, just move on to another subject. The less drama you put into it, usually, the les drama others will put into it as well. With good friends, who can accept it, they may feel hurt you didn't tell them sooner. Just tell them you had to be comfortable admitting it to yourself first, before you told anybody else. That should give them a reasonable explanation. With family,use the same reason, but expect some hurt and disappointment, but people get over it if they have an open enough mind, and love you. Most of all, just continue being the person you have always been. Don't let your sexuality be the defining characteristic of your life--it is a part of you, but not all of you. Just be yourself, and others will usually continue to treat you the same as always. Congratulations, and good luck!
 
davidjh7;bt108862 said:
Congratulations on finding your true self, and pursuing it. Remember, the only person you HAVE to really come out to is yourself--everybody else is determined by whether or not they are important, and a big enough part of your life, to share this personal detail with. I have found the best way is to not do it in some dramatic fasion. Homosexuality comes up from time to time with just about everybody, and it provides a segue to allow you to make the statement. Then you just say "Just to let oyu know, I'm gay." Then unless they and you really want to discuss it in more detail, just move on to another subject. The less drama you put into it, usually, the les drama others will put into it as well. With good friends, who can accept it, they may feel hurt you didn't tell them sooner. Just tell them you had to be comfortable admitting it to yourself first, before you told anybody else. That should give them a reasonable explanation. With family,use the same reason, but expect some hurt and disappointment, but people get over it if they have an open enough mind, and love you. Most of all, just continue being the person you have always been. Don't let your sexuality be the defining characteristic of your life--it is a part of you, but not all of you. Just be yourself, and others will usually continue to treat you the same as always. Congratulations, and good luck!

:arms: This is the best bit of advice altogether and EXACTLY what I found in my journey of coming out as bi to people in my life. You don't even have to tell everybody at first but rather let it just come about as it may with some. But yeah listen to this guy and of course to your own heart.
 
Yay! Good luck! The biggest thing is letting people know that you are still the person they always knew. You've always been gay, them knowing it doesn't change who you are as a person. Also, don' be super shocked and disappointed if people are okay with it and don't really ask any questions. I've found that that can be the biggest let down "what, don't you want to talk about how *gay* I am?" They might, they might not.
 
godlydick;bt108864 said:
Yay! Good luck! The biggest thing is letting people know that you are still the person they always knew. You've always been gay, them knowing it doesn't change who you are as a person. Also, don' be super shocked and disappointed if people are okay with it and don't really ask any questions. I've found that that can be the biggest let down "what, don't you want to talk about how *gay* I am?" They might, they might not.


This too is pretty good advice I would also like to add even if they don't have questions immediately maybe they will later. I forgot to say before in my previous comment that you shouldn't make the situation you do it in a serious one like the "we need to talk" moments. A great way is to make it a relaxed situation in which you bring it up. That way it doesn't have that serious "you should be frightful" type of air attached to it from the start.
 
Wow thanks everyone for all of your comments and help. i wasn't expecting this many responses but it sure did help out =D

What you guys have said just reaffirms the way i was gonna do it so thank you. I was already planning on just letting it come out when the time was right, no "we need to talk" moment or anything like that. Im a jokester so ill probably wait till someone is like "dude your so gay" and ill be like "bro you have no idea" lmao.

Yet Again, Thanks Everyone =)
 

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