Everyone around me is either pregnant or has a baby! I need help!

Lately, everyone I know that is around my age has a baby. Out of all the students I graduated with two years ago only about 5% had children. Now, about 30%. Everyone having a baby is having some kind of effect on me. When they have the baby they look sooooo cute. I wanna hold them and I love children. Now that I see everyone having children I feel like I want to pop out a baby. I know I can't afford one, I don't want to change stinky diapers or wipe boogie infested noses or wake up at 3 a.m. to a crying baby. Maybe I have this idea that babies are perfect. Am I too young to be having these thoughts of me holding my own child in my arm? Once, a girl told me that she had no pains when she was in all natural labor. My grandmother told her to "shut the fuck up" and told me that she was lying. I have this desire for children but I definately can't afford one. I have college and so much ahead of me. I always said i'd wait till i'm 30 to have kids but now seeing babies everywhere is driving me crazy! What can I do to help with this urge? At 19 I shouldn't be having strong feelings toward concieving a child but that's where I find myself.

Comments

nooooooo!!! don't think that you need a baby to make your life complete. babies are a lot of work and you're still so young! you've got sooo much ahead of you, things that you haven't seen and places you have yet to travel. if you have a baby now, especially at age 19, you're not going to be ready to handle it since since you're still in college. plus instead of having the chance to go out and experience new things, you're gonna be held down for the rest of your life if you pop out a kid. is that what you really want right now? i mean, i love kids and i think they're amazing! but aside from the cutness factor, they cry, poop, scream, test your patience, and throw up A LOT. just wait it out girl! don't rush into anything!
 
I know what you are feeling and I have been there. Trust me, I understand. :cool: It's like everytime you see an infant you get a twinge in your ovaries.

It's called a Biological Clock but it's really an alarm clock. You just need to hit the snooze alarm!

Getting pregnant at 19, when you are in college, and have no visible means of support is just beyond stupid. So what if all your friends are doing it. If they were all smoking crack and cutting themselves would you do that too? Didn't think so.
 
My biological clock has a long way to go but I see babies and i'm like "awwwwe". I feel like I want one but definately not the responsibilities. A few people I know were "trying" to get pregnant and they did. Yes, i am 19 and I do need to wait but everytime I see a baby I wanna hold or feed it.
 
girl, it's just your female instincts kicking in. of course babies are so precious and adorable and we all want to hold them. but like NJ said, you gotta hit the snooze button! having something and not wanting to full responsibility for it means you aren't ready.
 
"Awww" is fine, but 2-3-4 AM diaper changes are only good for those who are ready and who accept the responsibility.

PS: frequent changing does make it any easier and they still stink.
 
I have two adorable kids you can borrow for the summer. You can put them in cute dresses and do their hair and then watch them attack each other. Babies are easy. Its the kids that walk and talk and have attitudes that you have to watch out for.
 
"Lately, everyone I know that is around my age has a baby. Out of all the students I graduated with two years ago only about 5% had children. Now, about 30%. Everyone having a baby is having some kind of effect on me. When they have the baby they look sooooo cute. I wanna hold them and I love children. Now that I see everyone having children I feel like I want to pop out a baby. I know I can't afford one, I don't want to change stinky diapers or wipe boogie infested noses or wake up at 3 a.m. to a crying baby. Maybe I have this idea that babies are perfect. Am I too young to be having these thoughts of me holding my own child in my arm? Once, a girl told me that she had no pains when she was in all natural labor. My grandmother told her to "shut the fuck up" and told me that she was lying. I have this desire for children but I definately can't afford one. I have college and so much ahead of me. I always said i'd wait till i'm 30 to have kids but now seeing babies everywhere is driving me crazy! What can I do to help with this urge? At 19 I shouldn't be having strong feelings toward concieving a child but that's where I find myself."

I love children as well. But I wouldn't want a kid considering I may not be able to support them right in the future. If I would've had kids and not have been able to support them in all...I wouldn't be respectful to them by bringing hardship upon them. That is my view.

I understand urges. I have urges too. But is it right to act on them all the time without thinking them through? Logic is a great thing for impulse natures.
There is always a big picture for that short term.

Kids cannot be returned. You are not theirs after a certain age. They are their own entities with desires and interests.
 
You should really hit the snooze button...especially with potential men who are going to be fathers...Men have urges too. You both are acting on urges and both may not be the right people for the babies you are making.

My brother did the same thing and knocked up a woman and he was also married and with a kid then...so he destroyed his existing family by creating another one with a single woman. And it still isn't right to this day.
 
Hell, my biological clock is still flashing at 12:00... I wanna try making one, but, have _NOTHING_ to do with the responsibilities... I've apparently too much to deal with in dealing with my own needs/etc. (probably would make a good dad, but, REALLY has to get his own shit together)
But... this reminds me of a line from a movie I saw a while back...
In a cockney accent, the old, limping cripple asks a nurse, "Do you want to make a baaaybeee.... I've got auhl the spaare paarts in ice-chest..."
 
If you're in college this is not a good time to have a baby. You'd probably have to quit college, and your whole life would be put on hold.

Of course, this is coming from someone for whom maternal instincts and biological clocks are foreign concepts! I've never had either of these! I couldn't wait to get my tubes tied and when I did I felt a huge sense of relief! But that's me... Of course not everyone is as extreme as I am about this. But it is best, for those who DO want kids, to wait until they are financially able to support the kids. Besides, while you're young, live a little! :)
 
I am a male and now going on 41 so I helped raise my sisters kids i do not want any of my own but yes babies seem to be everywhere.
make sure you are as stable as you can be before you have a baby please.
 
offer to babysit one of these cute babies for a night. that might change your mind. it's a lot of hard work. you give up who you are in many ways once you become a mother. it's the hardest thing i've ever done in my life. i love my son, but i do miss the life i had before i was a mom. it's all-encompassing.

if you like children and want to be around them a lot, there are so many wonderful charities that can give you the contact you want without the 24-7 commitment. from visiting kids in hospitals to being a big sister, there are so many things you could do that would satisfy your urge to be around kids and do something good.
 
Children are 24/7 for the rest of your life.
It is not just the diapers and getting up at 3 in the AM. Who would be the Dad? Is he ready for a lifetime commitment to you and to children and are you ready for one to him?
Being single without $$ and not enough education is probably a commitment to a life of missing out and being without. Single parenting is a daunting task and unrelenting challenge to those who are older than you with more money than you, more education than you, and a career.

Work at a daycare. Cute kids. Nights and weekends off. People pay you instead of you paying them.

Delaying being a parent until you are better able will be better for you and the children.
 
Yeah....i guess there are plenty of people who would be dying to let me babysit their kids. When I was 17 two of my cousins (who were also 17) got pregnant. Maybe they give me their kids as loaners until I get tired (which would be when they take a shit)
 

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