As the summer time exhibitionism season returns, I'm beginning to realize that I am overdue at making adjustments to "my style". Last year's missed season has led me to self evaluate my exhibitionism motivations, erotic desires, and maturity. I am very voyeuristic, also.
As a youngster I "learned" to cover-up my nakedness. I can't remember all the lessons, but it was improper for me to expose my "private area" to others. I think that I was supposed to be embarrassed
I don't know how many years it took to "learn" the reasons that I should keep my cock "hidden". Sexuality lessons were revealed very slowly. I couldn't "understand" erotic stimulation existed without "sex education". During my generational development, sexuality was a taboo topic. I learned about child birth from my mother without the lesson of a sperm meeting up with an egg. Loving parents created the "blessing". I learned about the sexual activity from my nine year old buddy without making a connection to pregnancy. Why would a guy ever want to touch his penis to a girl's pussy
Today, I wonder about my childhood sexual ignorance. My sister was two years younger. I was tasked to be her "guardian" after school while my mother was at work. It was important to keep her "happy", so I could receive my "allowance ($)". That meant playing with her and her girlfriends. Quite often they wanted to play house (pretending to be a family-unit) without their dolls. It never happened, but those girls were always attempting to create some reason for me to get naked. I must have been around ten years old when one of her girlfriends grabbed at my crotch while we were playing games in the swimming pool. That summer enlightened me to the "fun".
The sensations were fun. I didn't understand eroticism. I was becoming an exhibitionist without realizing the definition of exhibitionism. Girls were curious about my penis. I couldn't understand their curiosity, but it felt "okay".