He's everything. Every single thing..

I almost lost the love of my life this week. I had no idea things were going to unfold the way they did, but I don't know if I'd have been able to stay sane without him in my life. If he had left over this (long story, don't bother with details) I would have never forgiven myself. My whole world is him. He's literally my everything. He's the most important person in my life and always will be. I can only hope he truly understands that. After this week, I don't think he fully does. I'll prove it to him. Because I have no other choice.

I want nothing but happiness for him, and I managed to hurt him, significantly. It doesn't matter that I didn't mean to or think I would, I did. And that's not something I'll ever forgive myself for.

If you happen to log on and see this, I fucking love you so much.

Comments

Lady, I love the hell out of you. I say this with all my heart-if he would have left, I would have hunted this mofo down and cursed him with shitty pizza, cold fries, twiggy weed and wet socks for the rest of his fucking life. Just an FYI.

Don't you dare blame yourself for any of this. None of it. Hold your head high, dig in and find the love and anger in you(you've got a right to both), and leave the fear and blame the fuck out of it.

♥️♥️
 
Last edited:
TnJ, I don't know the complete backstory of all this but you cannot change the past. It's done. Finito. All you can do is move forward. Learn from it and understand that your bloke sees whatever problem you had through different eyes and maybe he's just looking at it from the wrong angle and not seeing things properly. Fuck knows I've done that enough in my life. Take this as a comment from a man - we do see things from odd angles most of the time. It's just how we are and sometimes we crack the shits over problems that arise because we see that problem from an odd angle. I hope you and him can get back on an even road soon.

Cheers,

Haggard
 
D
Please accept my virtual hugs and support from across the net. Whatever happened, it has the potential to make you and your relationship stronger. Live into that. Make it so.:heart:
 
Strong and powerful soul,
You are an example of giving 100 percent even when the other partner isn’t.
You know we are told intimate relationships/partnerships/marriages are 50/50. Not true. They are 100/100.
You are doing just that, without reservation despite your fear.

Just know this, neither of you owns the blame here. It was miscommunication big time, and lesson now learned.
Hugs, fierce and protective!
 
@Scarletbegonia that last part about it being a miscommunication, it really wasn't. I'm not saying it was his fault, and no matter how much people will tell me it's not mine I take the blame. I understand why he blew up, but it wasn't because i wasn't very open and upfront about what was happening.

I should have known better. I should have brushed his comments off about things that made me feel like he wasn't happy. I took it too far too fast and I fully accept that he wasn't ok with it. And I'm sorry I did it. I don't think he'll ever see me the same way again, and I have to find a way to live with it.
 
I have limited context but I know enough to say life is complicated. It's hard. We live in a world of terrible irony where the people we most commonly hurt are the people we care about most and vice versa. Being close and open with anyone opens the door to painful things.

I don't pretend to know what happened but I'd imagine your heart was probably in the right place and I'm sorry for the anguish it seems like you have had to feel recently. You have a great deal of character. I'm certain you'll be in a much happier headspace with just a bit of time. You get a vote of confidence from me.
 
I posted a song here for you...but it fucked up the editing :) Chains....by Tina Arena. Aussie. Never feel you are owned, or you owe. Never.
 
Last edited:

Blog entry information

Author
Tight_N_Juicy
Read time
1 min read
Views
446
Comments
11
Last update

More entries in General

More entries from Tight_N_Juicy

  • 19 years
    New Year's Eve is our fuckversary. This year, 19 years. I've loved...
  • If you follow me...
    ... read my blog, my posts, and take the time to reach out when I'm not...
  • Insecure
    That's what I am.. He has always admitted and acknowledged the fact...
  • A new journey
    The biggest part of my physical take-back of my body and mind is done...
  • Chapter X...
    Sometimes life can feel like a long, detailed story someone is...

Share this entry