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I'm horrible at sex.

I have a girlfriend right now. We're getting along well and even though she's not as talkative as my girlfriends usually are, I like her. The only problems in our relationship seem to come from me and my insecurities. The biggest example of this is sex.

Although we have had the opportunity to fuck, we still have not had sex. The fault is, of course, mine. I find it very hard to initiate sex with her. I can kiss her and touch her all over, but when it comes to actually sticking my dick inside of her I feel extremely awkward and lose any desire to fuck.

I think it has a lot to do with the self image issues I have with my body and weight. Whenever I'm with her, I am very afraid that I will crush her. What's more, I can never figure out how sex is supposed to work between us. I just feel so fat, that I can't ever see myself being able to mount a woman or get myself into any kind of sexual position that would allow penetration.

I've had sex before, with women of varying sizes, so what I'm feeling is just me being an idiot, but I can't get these feelings out of my head.

I also wonder if I'm afraid of not satisfying her. Usually when I am successful at having intercourse, it's with women that I don't care about. Women that I seduce on the first date and then never call again or a prostitute, but usually if it's someone that I care about I can't muster up the courage to make love to them.

Okay, I'm done rambling.

Comments

HiddenLacey
Wally if you are so afraid you will not satisfy her from intercourse, satisfy her in another way first then roll on your back and have her ride you. Solves her not being satisfied and solves you being worried about squishing her (which I highly doubt you would do in the first place.)

Self image is hard to deal with. A lot of people struggle with it. I also agree with Mexdude. She wouldn't be with you if she wasn't attracted to something about you. CHILL out, obviously you like her so don't push her away with your insecurities. Let it happen.
 
E
Ask her to do the initiating..have her take the lead untill you feel comfortable. I have a girlfriend who'se mouth just waters from the sight of a cute big guy..fat, budha belly and all. If she is with you..she just absolutely loves your cuddlyness. Don't think about it.

Tell her to dominate..and take it from there :)
 
helgaleena
Definitely start out with her on top. And definitely ask her for some compassion if it's something you haven't tried before. Helping a guy out is a huge turn-on for the more nurturing sort of female.

Also ask her to put the rubber on you. It will make her feel safe.

If all this in your imagination is not turning you on btw, you simply do not have sufficient 'chemistry' with this particular woman. In that case, ease up and just be make-out friends. If she wants sex after six months of it, she'll jump you or break up, one or the other.
 
RedScrotum
Have her lay on her back at the edge of the bed...great position for oral with you kneeling, and then stand up when you two are ready for penetration....worth a try...
 
F
I don't know how big you are, but if you have enough penis available it may take a little creativity, but you can still do a very good job.

Unless you have gained a substantial quantity of weight since meeting this young lady, I would also think that she noticed your weight very quickly. If she is still with you, she finds you attractive and your weight quite possibly is not a negative for her.

If you care, open some dialog and talk about your insecurities on this issue. I suspect that she will be very receptive and if she wants to make love to you, she will give you some guidance as to what positions work well.

Whenever you have sex with a new person it is a learning process. Male or Female makes no difference. Because all people are different, their requirements and things that satisfy them both are different.

Relax! Just open some doors and see where it goes. Right now it sort of sounds like you're waiting for her to take a lead and she is waiting for you. That can be destructive.

Good luck open some dialog and take it from there. . . .
 
D
Just talk with her, as other members have said, she is your gf for some reason. Don't give up on changing your current body image if your not happy, change your diet or exercise routine, once you see results it will change your mindset to be more confident when getting intimate. Increased hormones from working out should help with the decreased labido.
Good luck in your relationship
 
MsThang
Don't tell her you were with a prostitute. Lord knows I would never let a guy touch me if he told me that.
 

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wallyj84
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