I never developed boners while in large group situations while naked with men until a very mature age. Erectile dysfunction makes manual stimulation for boner development a necessity, nowadays. I count on cock ring utilization for erection maintenance. I am an exhibitionist that craves "large cock admiration". I learned from health books at age 13 that masturbation should not be stigmatized. Yet, at age 55 as I began observing masturbation videos on the internet, I felt a twinge of embarrassment as the masturbator ejaculated in orgasmic relief. As I sat in a bathhouse ten years ago observing a guy jerking-off, I was impressed by his virility, but too embarrassed to move closer so my cock could be admired as he shot his load.
I've had many female partners observe my ejaculations through coitus interruptus, and only a few via hand jobs. My last hand job orgasm came from the wife about five years ago after her arm tired out, and she was surprised. She exclaimed that she couldn't remember the last time. The last time was 35 years prior while she was in the final days prior to giving birth to our second child. Many guys have jerked my cock, but I only recall one older gent bringing me to climax about 20 years ago. This occurred in a bathhouse following six hours of exhibitionistic edging in the whirlpool and steam room. The bathhouse went out of business over five years ago, so my exhibitionism habit had to transfer to my neighborhood YMCA. Returning to childhood "shameful" locker room behavior became a new masturbation lesson. Those lessons have been interrupted for over eight months, and I fear they can't resume for another year