My first time was in the spring of 2016 I was 21 and had just started at a new college after taking a few years off to work. I had gotten on an app just to chat with guys and figure out what I wanted. Obviously with apps, most guys wanted more than just to chat but at the time I was just too nervous to try anything. After a few weeks of randomly chatting with everyone, I eventually ended up agreeing to meet up with a guy at his hotel room. I don't really remember too much of the details but I know there was a lot of oral and I attempted anal but I was definitely too tight at the time. Because he was only in town for the night, I never saw him again.
Coincidently, that next week, I had quit my job because it was conflicting with school which meant I had no reason to still be using my parents car (They were letting me borrow theirs for work because mine had been totaled the previous year).
After that first experience, I was hooked. I kept wanting more. Unfortunately, without a car, it was hard for me to get around and my roommate was always around so I couldn't do anything in my dorm. For the entire semester, I was having random strangers pick me up from my dorm and take me to their place to do as they pleased. Eventually I loosened up physically, however, I was still nervous most of the time. At that time I would take almost any dick that came my way. I loved a challenge and always would see if I could find a bigger one than the last. During the summer, I was away on a service trip with friends so I was unable to do anything.
That next semester, I was in a new dorm with a new roommate who was never there. It became much easier to have guys over and the frequency increased drastically for the entire school year. (I think my count was somewhere in the 50's) The next summer I was back home so absolutely nothing happened at my own home (dad was always there) but I borrowed the car quite a bit and found a regular about 45 minutes away (mentioned in another blog post).
The last 5 semesters were the worst because I started commuting to school and even though I had gotten a new car, I was busy and it was hard to slip out of the house in the middle of the night. I started letting my anxiety get to me and every time I found someone to hookup with on the app, I freaked myself out and deleted the app. I did it enough times that I eventually got myself banned from the app for constantly deleting and remaking it.
It has been almost a year since I have done anything and It is driving me up the wall. I feel like I have tightened back up again and it is almost impossible to find anyone around. I'm still living with my dad until I can afford an appointment but I've gotten to the point where I honestly don't care if he walked in on me completely impaled by a monster. Most apps only show nearby but honestly, I'd be willing to drive a couple hours for a good dick, lol.
Coincidently, that next week, I had quit my job because it was conflicting with school which meant I had no reason to still be using my parents car (They were letting me borrow theirs for work because mine had been totaled the previous year).
After that first experience, I was hooked. I kept wanting more. Unfortunately, without a car, it was hard for me to get around and my roommate was always around so I couldn't do anything in my dorm. For the entire semester, I was having random strangers pick me up from my dorm and take me to their place to do as they pleased. Eventually I loosened up physically, however, I was still nervous most of the time. At that time I would take almost any dick that came my way. I loved a challenge and always would see if I could find a bigger one than the last. During the summer, I was away on a service trip with friends so I was unable to do anything.
That next semester, I was in a new dorm with a new roommate who was never there. It became much easier to have guys over and the frequency increased drastically for the entire school year. (I think my count was somewhere in the 50's) The next summer I was back home so absolutely nothing happened at my own home (dad was always there) but I borrowed the car quite a bit and found a regular about 45 minutes away (mentioned in another blog post).
The last 5 semesters were the worst because I started commuting to school and even though I had gotten a new car, I was busy and it was hard to slip out of the house in the middle of the night. I started letting my anxiety get to me and every time I found someone to hookup with on the app, I freaked myself out and deleted the app. I did it enough times that I eventually got myself banned from the app for constantly deleting and remaking it.
It has been almost a year since I have done anything and It is driving me up the wall. I feel like I have tightened back up again and it is almost impossible to find anyone around. I'm still living with my dad until I can afford an appointment but I've gotten to the point where I honestly don't care if he walked in on me completely impaled by a monster. Most apps only show nearby but honestly, I'd be willing to drive a couple hours for a good dick, lol.