No such thing as Bi!

A couple of years ago, a gay character in an English soap opera discovered that the guy he had been dating (another character in the soap) had been seeing a woman. When challenged, the guy he was dating said he hadn't regarded his relationship with the gay guy as serious and that he was bi-sexual. The gay guy replied, "There's no such thing as bi-sexual, it's just greed".

Most gay guys believe that their gayness is caused by genetics and there is some scientific evidence to suggest this to be true. Additionally many guys who have been subjected to homophobic attacks will say that if they had had a choice in the matter they wouldn't have chosen to be gay. Their life would have been far simpler if they were straight.

Gay cruising areas are frequented by lots of guys who say they are straight or bi. Some who make the claims also say that they are probably gay but have chosen to conform to family and society norms by living a "straight" life, with a wife and kids. Others say they are basically straight but that they get a sexual fulfilment from being with other guys that they can't get from being with a woman. Blow jobs are a particular favourite (guys do them better), while other want to be fucked by a guy but don't want to do anything in return. Other guys say that when they are with a woman, the pressure is on them to please the woman but when they are wth a guy the emphasis is on pleasing each other.

If the theories are true and that intrinsically we are either straight or gay then bi-sexuality is, greed? or perhaps more kindly a sexual drive that means individuals can enjoy sex with either men or women. What they are seeking is sexual fulfillment to deal with the very strong need they have to have sexual release/relief.

I wonder what other members think, and how they would then descibe themselves if the opportunity to identify percentages of gayness and straightness weren't available to them.

I'm still 100% gay, though I have lots of women friends.

Comments

Ambiguous title. What are you reaching for?

I went into a gay bar and picked up a woman.

I don't bi into the percentiles given on the board. sex happens.
 
It's not just a matter of sex though. Although I definitely prefer guys I think I qualify as bisexual. I can see the possibility of falling in love with a woman. If I wanted to conform and live an easier life I guess I could just choose to only pursue one or the other but either way would be like being in the closet as far as not being my true self.

And I am a one person guy. If I'm in a relationship assuming it's monogamous (I'm not seeking an open relationship but not against the idea if it's what both want) I'd be with just that person and be happy about it whether they're male or female. Sure I'd still be attracted to other people but so would any fully straight or gay guy. Basically it boils down to the fact that since I could see myself being happy with either a man or a woman I don't see any reason to eliminate either right off the bat.

Now, if only I could actually get a date with EITHER, lol.
 
"A couple of years ago, a gay character in an English soap opera discovered that the guy he had been dating (another character in the soap) had been seeing a woman. When challenged, the guy he was dating said he hadn't regarded his relationship with the gay guy as serious and that he was bi-sexual. The gay guy replied, 'There's no such thing as bi-sexual, it's just greed'."--gaygent

I think that men can be quite selfish no matter what the sexual orientation. Men will do what they want.
I know plenty of gay men who say that their bisexuals.
But I don't see them bringing women into the gay bar. I see the men more at the gay bar than straight bars.



 
The people who do not understand bisexuality or who are biphobic will say that bisexuality does not exist or that it's just greed. Sometimes they are jealous that they are gay or lesbian, and not bisexual.

The funniest thing is when gay men say that being bisexual is someone that's just horny or experimenting and then I'll ask them that when they are really horny or want to experiment sexually, if they have sex with women and this usually shuts them up.

You wrote about how some bisexual men are more into the idea of sex with men just being a blowjob or getting fucked, or how sex with men is all about pleasing each other.

There are A LOT of totally homosexual men who are the exact same way when it comes to sex, and just because a man is bisexual it does not mean that he'll be this way. I also do not see anything wrong with being this way.

What sexual theories are you talking about that say that we're basically either straight or gay? Read some Kinsey or actual sexuality studies and you'll see that bisexuality does exist. Or actually meet some bisexuals who are not just closeted gay guys who are afraid to come out as being gay.

Also with being bisexual you do not have to act on your attractions to both genders, you do not have to fall in love with both genders, you do not have to actively date/sleep with both genders at the same time, and you do not have to be equally attracted to both genders at all times.
 
"Also with being bisexual you do not have to act on your attractions to both genders, you do not have to fall in love with both genders, you do not have to actively date/sleep with both genders at the same time, and you do not have to be equally attracted to both genders at all times."--Bearded Wolf


If I were bisexual, I would want to be attracted to both sexes at the same time. And I would want to date them both.

I am gay. I have been attracted to many men while I was dating one guy.
 
>If I were bisexual, I would want to be attracted to both sexes at the same time. And I would want to date them both<

Sexuality isn't always about what you want. I know bisexuals who are attracted to both genders at the same time and many who simply are not at all. What if you were bisexual but were only able to fall in love with the opposite gender? Or you went for long periods of time (months, not a lifetime or the rest of your life) where you were just attracted to one gender? These both are very common among bisexuals too.

As far as dating both at the same time goes, I have no qualms with open relationships, or consensual relationships with more than one person at the same time; but IME and from what I have seen they usually do not last.
 
Sexuality isn't always about what you want.

Oh, how I know that for a fact.

I know bisexuals who are attracted to both genders at the same time and many who simply are not at all.

I have met bisexuals like that as well. I was going by the way I am wired. I am gay. I can fall in love with a lot of men while having a relationship with one guy. If I were bisexual, I would have liked to be able to love a guy as well as a woman. That would be cool. But again, I know a person's sexuality--you don't have control over what you want.

What if you were bisexual but were only able to fall in love with the opposite gender? Well. I would be a happy straight guy. I think. :smile: Or you went for long periods of time (months, not a lifetime or the rest of your life) where you were just attracted to one gender? :eek: I hope that isn't the case with me. These both are very common among bisexuals too.

As far as dating both at the same time goes, I have no qualms with open relationships, or consensual relationships with more than one person at the same time; but IME and from what I have seen they usually do not last.

Well, I haven't had much success in relationships that are monogamous though. I haven't had any open polyamorous relationships yet. If I am ever in one that didn't last...then, that is the way for the relationships I have had so far. If I were bi, I would like to be able to date, meet, fuck as many women and men just for experiences. Same sex-wise, that is what I have done with men in my twenties. I had dated and had sex with a lot of men. Young. Old. Successful. Poor. Black. White.
 

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