Man, this sucks....I don't even feel up to leaving the house. I saw my shrink today and he put me on this new medicine called Invega. It's supposed to have less sexual side-effects or chance of hair thinning. Those are the main reasons why I want to be off pills, all together.
I've been on pills for seven years. The sad truth is that all of the depression/bipolar/anxiety meds cause hair thinning to some degree. I already noticed a change in texture. I'm afraid that if some of it begins to fall out...it won't ever regrow and I'll have to spend thousands of dollars on hair treatment. Yes, call me "Uncle Jesse" if you will, but I think my hair is my best feature. Well, unless the statistics are true, and my cock is really bigger than like 85% of guys or so.
As for sexual dysfunction. I'll admit it. Sometimes it's hard to get erect. The one time I was in a sexual situation (I was getting blown and jacked off) it was difficult to maintain an erection. Granted, it was a weird situation. I'd been drinking. So had she. We went to this frat party and we were grinding to horrible rap like 50 Cent. (It was the jock frat. We actually had a nerdy frat on my campus, LOL)
She wasn't really my type. But when you're 21 and never been with a woman, you don't really care much for standards. Besides, the best thing about her was that she was hot for me. It was like she was in heat. She was kind of a self-described nympho, though, so I suppose she'd be in heat for anyone. Anyway, she went bragging around to the entire school that we were going to have sex. I think people were kind of a little weirded out because that's not really something you go shouting around campus, but as a latent whore, I loved the attention.
Anyway....did I tell you she was a mostly lesbian bisexual? I think she was turned on when I was doing tarot cards (I do them, occasionally) in a big witch hat (this was by Halloween) in the lounge in my dorm.
On second thought, I don't think it was a very satisfying experience. First off, a woman expects a guy to be hard at all times during sex. If he's not, it's kind of an insult. Am I right? Second, I had the ridiculous notion that women want to make love. No, women want to fuck. Same as men. I was all gentle with her, sucking her big titties, which I loved and would love to do again. She had this tongue ring and she was sucking on me, and I kind of twitched. It didn't really feel that good to be honest. Maybe it was the lithium. Also she jacked me off and I got aroused at the thought of it.
We were going to have sex. However, we couldn't find condoms before we got into it as they were all out of them by my RA's door. (I lived in the smokers/party dorm. Not surprising that they were out)
Anyway....the thing I remember most is when she called me thick. That was pretty nice to hear from someone who has most likely been around.
All in all, it was a sloppy experience. I didn't cum. We went it for like 3 hours. I really wanted to pay her back and eat her out, but I was afraid that I wouldn't be good at it, especially compared to the women she's been with. Basically, I think if a lady sucks your dick, you should return the favor.
Anyway, the next day was.....uncomfortable to say the least. See, she had a girlfriend back home. She actually put me on the phone with her and the gf said "How did it feel to get your dick sucked?" I was red-faced. I just didn't say anything and handed the phone back. Yeah, it's a pretty grimy thing to do.
The bad thing is it could have probably been more than a one-time thing. She came back the next day mid-afternoon (I think that was a sign....) and inquired about me....but I told her I had to study for this paper on Frankenstein for my British Lit class, which I did have to do. Still......this happened before....putting work before ladies. It's a trap I fall into. But what is worse? Not getting pussy or getting a B instead of an A? Heh, it's kind of simple if you look at it like that.
Anyway....I really got sidetracked..heh. Basically, I think the lithium might have had an effect on me staying hard. My cousin is on Risperdol, which is like Invega, and she loves having sex. So, hopefully, my libido will go up, and I can get some 100% erections once I'm off the Geodon.
I also want to eventually get off Effexor. There's only a 1% chance of hair loss on it. Less than Geodon. But still. I still want to see what Invega's percentage is...the ideal situation, is to get off Effexor and Ativan, and just stay on Invega. The more pills I'm on, the more chance of promoting the hair loss and sexual dysfunction.
Oh, and I sent another e-mail to M. I asked her to give me her phone number and promised a gift for her if she would meet me at Habana Outpost over the Christmas break. I was thinking it'd probably be off-Broadway tickets. Maybe to a performance (if there are any) of The Shape of Things. I played the main guy in that (a chubby, nerdy guy) in my acting class and she played the main lady in that (a knockout looking to transform said loser into a hunk) in a performance. We joked about that when we met....
Peace,
PP
I've been on pills for seven years. The sad truth is that all of the depression/bipolar/anxiety meds cause hair thinning to some degree. I already noticed a change in texture. I'm afraid that if some of it begins to fall out...it won't ever regrow and I'll have to spend thousands of dollars on hair treatment. Yes, call me "Uncle Jesse" if you will, but I think my hair is my best feature. Well, unless the statistics are true, and my cock is really bigger than like 85% of guys or so.
As for sexual dysfunction. I'll admit it. Sometimes it's hard to get erect. The one time I was in a sexual situation (I was getting blown and jacked off) it was difficult to maintain an erection. Granted, it was a weird situation. I'd been drinking. So had she. We went to this frat party and we were grinding to horrible rap like 50 Cent. (It was the jock frat. We actually had a nerdy frat on my campus, LOL)
She wasn't really my type. But when you're 21 and never been with a woman, you don't really care much for standards. Besides, the best thing about her was that she was hot for me. It was like she was in heat. She was kind of a self-described nympho, though, so I suppose she'd be in heat for anyone. Anyway, she went bragging around to the entire school that we were going to have sex. I think people were kind of a little weirded out because that's not really something you go shouting around campus, but as a latent whore, I loved the attention.
Anyway....did I tell you she was a mostly lesbian bisexual? I think she was turned on when I was doing tarot cards (I do them, occasionally) in a big witch hat (this was by Halloween) in the lounge in my dorm.
On second thought, I don't think it was a very satisfying experience. First off, a woman expects a guy to be hard at all times during sex. If he's not, it's kind of an insult. Am I right? Second, I had the ridiculous notion that women want to make love. No, women want to fuck. Same as men. I was all gentle with her, sucking her big titties, which I loved and would love to do again. She had this tongue ring and she was sucking on me, and I kind of twitched. It didn't really feel that good to be honest. Maybe it was the lithium. Also she jacked me off and I got aroused at the thought of it.
We were going to have sex. However, we couldn't find condoms before we got into it as they were all out of them by my RA's door. (I lived in the smokers/party dorm. Not surprising that they were out)
Anyway....the thing I remember most is when she called me thick. That was pretty nice to hear from someone who has most likely been around.
All in all, it was a sloppy experience. I didn't cum. We went it for like 3 hours. I really wanted to pay her back and eat her out, but I was afraid that I wouldn't be good at it, especially compared to the women she's been with. Basically, I think if a lady sucks your dick, you should return the favor.
Anyway, the next day was.....uncomfortable to say the least. See, she had a girlfriend back home. She actually put me on the phone with her and the gf said "How did it feel to get your dick sucked?" I was red-faced. I just didn't say anything and handed the phone back. Yeah, it's a pretty grimy thing to do.
The bad thing is it could have probably been more than a one-time thing. She came back the next day mid-afternoon (I think that was a sign....) and inquired about me....but I told her I had to study for this paper on Frankenstein for my British Lit class, which I did have to do. Still......this happened before....putting work before ladies. It's a trap I fall into. But what is worse? Not getting pussy or getting a B instead of an A? Heh, it's kind of simple if you look at it like that.
Anyway....I really got sidetracked..heh. Basically, I think the lithium might have had an effect on me staying hard. My cousin is on Risperdol, which is like Invega, and she loves having sex. So, hopefully, my libido will go up, and I can get some 100% erections once I'm off the Geodon.
I also want to eventually get off Effexor. There's only a 1% chance of hair loss on it. Less than Geodon. But still. I still want to see what Invega's percentage is...the ideal situation, is to get off Effexor and Ativan, and just stay on Invega. The more pills I'm on, the more chance of promoting the hair loss and sexual dysfunction.
Oh, and I sent another e-mail to M. I asked her to give me her phone number and promised a gift for her if she would meet me at Habana Outpost over the Christmas break. I was thinking it'd probably be off-Broadway tickets. Maybe to a performance (if there are any) of The Shape of Things. I played the main guy in that (a chubby, nerdy guy) in my acting class and she played the main lady in that (a knockout looking to transform said loser into a hunk) in a performance. We joked about that when we met....
Peace,
PP