So bored....

I am bored to tears, but I can't bring myself to go to bed quite yet... it's too early! So, I'm sitting on my patio on this mild autumn evening, smoking cigarettes, and trying to think of something fun to do that doesn't require leaving my house. And trying not to think about Chris.

I guess I should give you all the latest update on that. I went to the bar last night, knowing full well that Chris wouldn't be there because he was going to be DJ'ing a karaoke show at a different bar. Hell, knowing he wasn't going to be there made it easier to go. The regular Saturday night DJ, Tony, wasn't there for whatever reason, so Jay took his place. Jay is the lovely DJ that fucked up my Wednesday night when he said that a particular song was dedicated to Chris. Jay and I got to talking about Chris, and he said that when Wes told him that I liked him two months ago or whenever it was, Chris didn't believe him - he thought Wes was just joking or fucking with him. So apparently, all of this time he really didn't have any idea that I liked him. *sigh* So Jay did that song dedication thing to further prove to Chris that I was, in fact, interested. I'm thinking that Jay probably could have found a better way to do that, but whatever... that's history. I guess Chris never came outright and said that he was interested in me as well, but Jay swears up and down that he is, just judging from his actions. Jay has been a DJ for many moons, and is really good at reading people. I just hope that he's not wrong now. He said that the most likely reason that Chris avoided me on Friday night is because he was just as embarrassed as I was over the whole ordeal. Jay also says that Chris is by far the shyest person he knows. So I still have no idea what the fuck is going on, but at least I got a reason from Jay for doing what he did... even if it wasn't a very good one.

In other news, I go back to school tomorrow for the first time in 6 days, thanks to our fall break. It feels like it's been an eternity since I've been to school. Blah. I really don't want to go back, but I guess I better. :smile: Hopefully I'll get back into the groove pretty quickly.

I need to cuddle. Preferably with an adult. My son makes a great cuddle buddy, but it's not the same. I want to feel a mans arms around me. His lips pressed against mine. It's been way too long. :frown1:

Comments

Oh just ask the damn fool out & be done with it, at least then you'll know one way or the other. Tho if he's that shy he might say no (or not reply) even if he wants to say yes.
 

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