The Date...

Well it didn't happen. I chickened out at the last moment.

I couldn't stop thinking about being looked at, and after a whole morning of throwing up (nerves) and then 'prettying' myself up I texted to say that I just couldn't face it.
We've know each other for quite a while, and he is well versed in my inability to do many basic things that others take for granted.

Luckily I didn't spoil his day, but now I just feel so deflated. I had (somehow) managed to make myself look nice, not just reasonable or passable, but actually date 'worthy'.

And after I had sent the text you know that I regretted it. You know that I just wanted to do it, to actually enjoy myself. The second the anxiety and stress and fear lifted after sending that text, all I wanted to do was go on the f-ing date...

I hate social anxiety...

-LUM-

Comments

No man! You fader! Lol
You shouldn't put so much pressure on yourself. Easier said than done, I know.
How about making the first date a bit more casual or in a place that might be less intimidating?
 
Unfortunatly it WAS set up as the most comfortable setting I could imagine. Didnt help... Lol
 
LUM, I am afraid this happens way more than you would think. I am assuming this was someone you met online?

I think the anxiety of meeting someone that you know in only one dimension is so overwhelming at times, it is easier to back out than to face the date and possibly be disappointed (or to disappoint). In my case.. I've only been disappointed twice when I met the guy. Both times they TOTALLY misrepresented themselves (which I don't get at all.)

If you are honest about yourself and have known a person a good while online, then more than likely the meeting is going to be a good experience. I agree with Auggie... don't put so much pressure on yourself.

I know it sounds dumb, but deep breathing does help. And so does staying busy up until the moment you go. Once you get there, if it is not what you expect, you can always say, "let's go a little further next time." or "just not feeling the chemistry".
 

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