I seem to have become the go-to guy when someone needs advice or help with any penis-related situation.
I've grown my "customer base" through years and I guess that now mouth-to-ear is just bringing me an constant inflow of people in need of anything related to their sex lives.
I recently got a message from a guy I did not really know who's been dating a girl from our community for years now. They're both in their twenties and he wants to propose.
He was blue balled to the core, having spent two years of his life in a relationship with a girl who did not want anything to do with his genitals. I was curious about it and he was willing to talk about it.
He told me that there had been NOTHING sexual between them during the whole first year and then she agreed to some pussy licking. Later on, she made him discover prostatic pleasure, first with fingers, then with dildoes but nothing more. She never even touched her cock once and he had to keep his underwear on at all times, even during sex. She did not even want to look at it.
There was nothing wrong with his junk though, except that it was uncut and unpierced. They talked about it several times and she was very adamant about the fact that her orifices were to remain virgin until marriage and that she would not be penetrated by an unclean dick.
That's typical of women in our social circles. They're even stricter than men. I mostly talk about our fathers on this blog because these are the ones I share a group chat with and because they handle all the sex talk and sex ed for both their boys and their girls but that doesn't mean our mothers and sisters stay coy. They behave more like bosses : they assume the job will get done and it it doesn't they step in and say something. There was this story about one of my ants who realised, when her third son was almost 18, that her husband, my uncle, who was caught in work and had many other things to think about, had simply forgotten to "fulfil his duties" by talking to the boy, arranging the appointment with the surgeon... and my cousin hadn't say anything. I was there the day she blew off in a "You had one job !" type of way. This partly happened because of me who casually brought up the subject because I wanted to know when his recovery party was going to happen and if I needed to take a day off for it. The whole scene looked and sounded like it came out of a sitcom :
- What do you mean, you forgot? She asked
- He doesn't even really need it ! He replied in order to justify his blunder.
- Have you lost your mind?
- No, let me show you !
G was their third son, the one my uncle had forgotten to book a doctor's appointment for and he was not home at the moment. My uncle then proceeded to send him a text saying "Sup' son ! Could you send me a nude picture please? " to which G answered "Dad, WTF?". The man had then to explain to him that he had forgotten to book the appointment, soon answered by a plethora of shocked, surprised appalled and sad emojis from G, to which my uncle replied by saying something like "But that's okay, you don't really need the full thing, right? Please send me a naked picture so that your mom stops screaming at me for forgetting."
G's first answer was "This whole situation is sick, you know that, right? Wait a minute." with no picture. Three minutes later, still no picture. My uncle replied "WYD? We're waiting and your mom is about to kill me ! "
"Can I, at least, get some time to take a good looking picture,. PLEASE ?? "
At this point, I was laughing but not too hard because my aunt and uncle were giving dark glances for making fun of their situation. I felt compelled to add :
"Well, at least you know you raised him well, because he did not have ready-made nudes on his phone!"
To which my aunt added angrily : "And thanks to his father-of-the-year, he's about to have to remain a virgin for another year ! ", she signed and resumed "I swear to God, P, if our son fails his exams or worse... becomes a psychopath ...."
She was being a little overly dramatic but she made a point many people think in our community : having sex is crucial for young people. My Dad, with his own very personal words calls it "get the poison out". I do not believe she actually thinks her son my become a psychopath because he would have had to refrain from having sex for another year but she definitely meant it about his exams. I know it because I've heard it from my own mother and many other woman her age. I also kind of share this opinion. In order to sustain a lifestyle that's mainly entered around work, one needs to exercise and have sex. That's as simple as that. Sport is never an option, it's an obligation and sex is almost an obligation. It's not really compulsory but the way it's talked about infuses the idea that it's an important part of life in the brains of every generation. I remember the last three months before my high school exams : I was allowed to do only three things : work (70% of the day), exercise (20%) and fuck (10%). I wasn't allowed to go out or stay up late, but I could definitely invite all sorts of friends in (boys or girls, I did both and it did not matter) on Friday and Saturday nights. We would just blow some steam (and some dicks) behind closed doors, make all the noise we wanted, no one cared. They'd be back home by 10pm sharp. That's how you get your exams with high distinctions! Sometimes my parents would even arrange a blind date for me, inviting over for dinner people from the community they barely knew just because they had a daughter my age with a high school exam pending and some steam of her own to blow. It was never called a "blind date" and sometimes we ended up not liking each other that way, but, a few times, I ended up in my room shagging this complete stranger between the main course and desert. It's almost like helping a friend. At the end, after they left, Dad would say something like "She needed it, right!" to which the answer was alway "Yes, she did!" and then he would pat me on the shoulder adding "You're such a nice guy! "
So, my aunt going crazy did not surprise me at all as she was primarily worried about her son's mental health and secondarily worried about potential friends' daughter who struggled finding a clean guy to "blow some steam". It was almost a feminist act for her in the sense that it was not only him who was going to be horny and blue balled for another year but also potential girls in the community who wouldn't be able to have the fun they deserved because of lack of potential partners their age. She had been one of these girls before, she knew what she was talking about. Needless to say, unclean guys were NOT an option.
Then, the picture finally came :
"What's up with the artistic background?" was my uncles first reaction.
" If this picture ever goes out, I don't want anyone to think that it's a habit for me to take nudes in public bathrooms !"
" Makes sense! " commented my uncle.
He then showed it to us, especially to his wife and said, in a loud voice :
" Already a man, happy now ?" before specifying " By the way, he definitely got it from my side of the family !"
She finally seemed to calm down and allowed herself that joke :
"Yeah, right, then why did your dad tell me the surgeon took enough skin off of you to renovate a couch? These are his words!"
"When did he tell you that?"
"On the day we got married !"
"He must have mistaken me for someone else..."
"Anyways, G is going to the piercer tomorrow first thing in the morning." she announced.
"THE PIERCER !!!" We both screamed while holding our crotches.
" Are you crazy, woman? There's no way he's gonna do it without anaesthesia...I've been through that, and that's a hard no !" yelled my uncle.
" You've been through that, and judging by how you gave it to me this morning, you turned out just fine!" she described.
"TMI " I dared adding but no one cared.
" Don't even think to get away with that using flattery !" He opposed.
" Don't be such a baby, P! It's just a little needle! Besides, that'll toughen him a little ! I don't even know why people started using anaesthesia for that. " she dared saying.
" Then do it to yourself ! "Toughen him up", how dare you ? My son is tough enough, don't you dare say otherwise! Have you seen him beat the crap out of his opponents at boxing class? Oh, right, you never come to watch him fight ! " He replied.
The conversation started to get ugly so I decided to put an end to it by yelling : " GUYS, STOP FIGHTING, I HAVE A SOLUTION !"
This time, I helped them sort the problem because I built a pretty close relationships with many surgeons. I took the boy halfway across the country in his speed train, thankfully the winter break had just begun, and got him pierced literally two days after the fight between my aunt and my uncle. It also happened to be his 18th birthday. He had to cancel his birthday party and ski trip with his friends because this was literally the only option for him without having to wait another six months. It all happened on a day the surgeon was supposed to take off but a little extra money helped solve the problem. I also had to tell him that my uncle and aunt were on the brink of divorce because of that (which was clearly an exaggeration). Fast forward two days of bed rest, he was back on the high speed train back home and I got a nice bank transfer, a few months later I also got a thank you message from both parents and a reputation of a problem solver.
Please not the pun on that last picture "Au poil" ("by the hair") is a french expression to say that everything is perfectly alright. Here it's also, obviously a way to state that he's cleaner than clean, fully shaven like every boy his age "should be".
This one is literally the first time he jerked off after recovery. He sent it to me. There also a pun because his mom said "it would toughen him", "toughen" is more like "harden" in French, so the caption that came with this one was "Looks hard enough to me!". Needless to say that there were no "hard" feelings between them (pun intended).
My aunt could play matchmaker with all her friends' daughters, trying to gain points in her social circle by providing every 16 to 19 year old girl around her with a fine looking and (as you could see) tough/hard enough little boxer, but that was also a failure. Another thing her husband had forgotten to share with her was that this boy is as gay as it gets. He had told his dad years before but, by now, you might understand why he did not tell his mom, but that's a story for another time (and, I promise, it does have a happy and quite funny ending).
Anyways, my aunt contacted me directly to arrange everything when her fourth and last son's turn to get clean arrived. She was not about to let this last-minute situation happen again.
I'm currently on my sixth intervention of that kind.
So it was no surprise when I received a message from that guy, named W, who did not really know what to do and how to do it. He was 25 at the time and, like I said, wanted to propose, mostly out of love and partially out of simply wanting to get his cock serviced. He had heard that some guys did not need the snip and hoed he was one of them. I asked him to send me a picture and got this :
- WDYT?
- Bro, you're half hard and still I think you're gonna need a snip. Send me a fully soft picture.
- Who do you think you were gonna full with this ?
- At least I tried !
Of course he was just joking, he knew it and that was why he came to me in the first place. It's also an excuse for me to post before-after pictures of him.
Now, I will never criticise a guy for being particular and specific about his junk, but this one was a real pain in the ass and believe me I know what I'm talking about.
I have seen dads barging in the doctor's office with hundreds of pictures showing exactly how they feel their sons have to get cut. I have seen one pulling his own pants down and asking for "a carbon copy". Some of them ask their sons to write the full measurements (hard and soft, length and girth) as well as the length of their inner foreskin on a spreadsheet and spent half an hour talking about it with the surgeon. You might think that getting a low and tight cut is a two-minute discussion but it isn't. Even this type of cut sometimes calls for lengthy discussions, most of the time between dads and doctors, sometimes between the actual boy who's getting cut and the doctor, sometimes it's a debate between the three of them. See, it's not only a matter of health, it's also a matter of beliefs and wishes. The doctors we use are also clean guys, sometimes close friends or even relatives and they're not afraid to give their opinion, medical, ethical and personal, all three of them.
Doctor's usually don't want to give low and tight, at least the surgeon I know the best is completely against it because it can lead to problems to reach orgasm, especially when one grows old. Dads are usually against low and tight even if they, themselves got it because they think it makes it too difficult to jerk off. Young people, these days, usually want as low and tight as possible, that's a trend amongst the community. I'd say 80% to 90% of this who got done during the past 10 years got low and tight.
Then there's the question of the piercing(s) they're gonna get. That's when it gets personal. 95% of people I know got at least the same one their own fathers have, some of them another one on top of it. There is little to no debate. When the doctor asks the question, the boy is expected to answer, on his own, something like "same as Dad". The 5% remaining ones are usually sons of guys who only got a PA. PA is kind of seen as "the bare minimum of piercing", first generation guys get them because they hurt less (when they don't want or can't have it surgically done, they go to a pierced which usually doesn't provide anesthesia) but as soon as the second generation pops in, something "heavier" is expected. It also often happened that the dad got his dick re-pierced at the same time to make sure everyone in the household gets the same. I know it sounds weird to people who did not grow up this way, but it's a very strong mindset : piercings have to be the same from one generation to the other. Good thing is that this opinion is shared by dads and sons, we're all on the same page. Boys want the same piercing as their fathers and fathers want their sons to be pierced the same, no questions asked.
But W was new to it, first generation, no noisy father and, in a sense, it was even worse. He did his research and had printed out all internet had to offer reading opinions on circumcision and you guys probably know there is literally everything and its opposite that's been written on this topic online. I'll spare you the details because he had this lengthy conversation with me once and with the doctor a second time. Also, being a nudist himself, he wanted to get cut without it "being to obvious" so that his family won't ask questions. I had to let him know it was impossible for it not to be too obvious. Besides, he was going to have a metal bar with a ball on each end going through his knob so...that was going to be very obvious. He would have to talk about it with them eventually.
On top of that, he's a shower more than a grower so he took all sorts of measurements in order to decide the exact amount of skin he wanted off. He made it very clear that he wanted to keep "one or two folds of inner foreskin nicely gathered behind the corona". Last time I helped an older dude getting his cut, I just pulled down my pants and he said "that sounds about right" and got more or less the same. This was not going to cut it, pun intended. Yet, he did not have the time to betook fussy because he was planning on taking advantage of the fact that he would be appart from his girlfriend for a few months to heal and surprise her with the proposal. It had to be done in a short two-week window.
All in all he seems to be happy with the result although the happiest one is definitely his future wife. Four months after the operation (recovery for the piercing takes forever), he got naked, on his knees, proposed and she said yes.
Here's the final result :
And yes, he hasn't worn clothes inside ever since.
I've grown my "customer base" through years and I guess that now mouth-to-ear is just bringing me an constant inflow of people in need of anything related to their sex lives.
I recently got a message from a guy I did not really know who's been dating a girl from our community for years now. They're both in their twenties and he wants to propose.
He was blue balled to the core, having spent two years of his life in a relationship with a girl who did not want anything to do with his genitals. I was curious about it and he was willing to talk about it.
He told me that there had been NOTHING sexual between them during the whole first year and then she agreed to some pussy licking. Later on, she made him discover prostatic pleasure, first with fingers, then with dildoes but nothing more. She never even touched her cock once and he had to keep his underwear on at all times, even during sex. She did not even want to look at it.
There was nothing wrong with his junk though, except that it was uncut and unpierced. They talked about it several times and she was very adamant about the fact that her orifices were to remain virgin until marriage and that she would not be penetrated by an unclean dick.
That's typical of women in our social circles. They're even stricter than men. I mostly talk about our fathers on this blog because these are the ones I share a group chat with and because they handle all the sex talk and sex ed for both their boys and their girls but that doesn't mean our mothers and sisters stay coy. They behave more like bosses : they assume the job will get done and it it doesn't they step in and say something. There was this story about one of my ants who realised, when her third son was almost 18, that her husband, my uncle, who was caught in work and had many other things to think about, had simply forgotten to "fulfil his duties" by talking to the boy, arranging the appointment with the surgeon... and my cousin hadn't say anything. I was there the day she blew off in a "You had one job !" type of way. This partly happened because of me who casually brought up the subject because I wanted to know when his recovery party was going to happen and if I needed to take a day off for it. The whole scene looked and sounded like it came out of a sitcom :
- What do you mean, you forgot? She asked
- He doesn't even really need it ! He replied in order to justify his blunder.
- Have you lost your mind?
- No, let me show you !
G was their third son, the one my uncle had forgotten to book a doctor's appointment for and he was not home at the moment. My uncle then proceeded to send him a text saying "Sup' son ! Could you send me a nude picture please? " to which G answered "Dad, WTF?". The man had then to explain to him that he had forgotten to book the appointment, soon answered by a plethora of shocked, surprised appalled and sad emojis from G, to which my uncle replied by saying something like "But that's okay, you don't really need the full thing, right? Please send me a naked picture so that your mom stops screaming at me for forgetting."
G's first answer was "This whole situation is sick, you know that, right? Wait a minute." with no picture. Three minutes later, still no picture. My uncle replied "WYD? We're waiting and your mom is about to kill me ! "
"Can I, at least, get some time to take a good looking picture,. PLEASE ?? "
At this point, I was laughing but not too hard because my aunt and uncle were giving dark glances for making fun of their situation. I felt compelled to add :
"Well, at least you know you raised him well, because he did not have ready-made nudes on his phone!"
To which my aunt added angrily : "And thanks to his father-of-the-year, he's about to have to remain a virgin for another year ! ", she signed and resumed "I swear to God, P, if our son fails his exams or worse... becomes a psychopath ...."
She was being a little overly dramatic but she made a point many people think in our community : having sex is crucial for young people. My Dad, with his own very personal words calls it "get the poison out". I do not believe she actually thinks her son my become a psychopath because he would have had to refrain from having sex for another year but she definitely meant it about his exams. I know it because I've heard it from my own mother and many other woman her age. I also kind of share this opinion. In order to sustain a lifestyle that's mainly entered around work, one needs to exercise and have sex. That's as simple as that. Sport is never an option, it's an obligation and sex is almost an obligation. It's not really compulsory but the way it's talked about infuses the idea that it's an important part of life in the brains of every generation. I remember the last three months before my high school exams : I was allowed to do only three things : work (70% of the day), exercise (20%) and fuck (10%). I wasn't allowed to go out or stay up late, but I could definitely invite all sorts of friends in (boys or girls, I did both and it did not matter) on Friday and Saturday nights. We would just blow some steam (and some dicks) behind closed doors, make all the noise we wanted, no one cared. They'd be back home by 10pm sharp. That's how you get your exams with high distinctions! Sometimes my parents would even arrange a blind date for me, inviting over for dinner people from the community they barely knew just because they had a daughter my age with a high school exam pending and some steam of her own to blow. It was never called a "blind date" and sometimes we ended up not liking each other that way, but, a few times, I ended up in my room shagging this complete stranger between the main course and desert. It's almost like helping a friend. At the end, after they left, Dad would say something like "She needed it, right!" to which the answer was alway "Yes, she did!" and then he would pat me on the shoulder adding "You're such a nice guy! "
So, my aunt going crazy did not surprise me at all as she was primarily worried about her son's mental health and secondarily worried about potential friends' daughter who struggled finding a clean guy to "blow some steam". It was almost a feminist act for her in the sense that it was not only him who was going to be horny and blue balled for another year but also potential girls in the community who wouldn't be able to have the fun they deserved because of lack of potential partners their age. She had been one of these girls before, she knew what she was talking about. Needless to say, unclean guys were NOT an option.
Then, the picture finally came :
"What's up with the artistic background?" was my uncles first reaction.
" If this picture ever goes out, I don't want anyone to think that it's a habit for me to take nudes in public bathrooms !"
" Makes sense! " commented my uncle.
He then showed it to us, especially to his wife and said, in a loud voice :
" Already a man, happy now ?" before specifying " By the way, he definitely got it from my side of the family !"
She finally seemed to calm down and allowed herself that joke :
"Yeah, right, then why did your dad tell me the surgeon took enough skin off of you to renovate a couch? These are his words!"
"When did he tell you that?"
"On the day we got married !"
"He must have mistaken me for someone else..."
"Anyways, G is going to the piercer tomorrow first thing in the morning." she announced.
"THE PIERCER !!!" We both screamed while holding our crotches.
" Are you crazy, woman? There's no way he's gonna do it without anaesthesia...I've been through that, and that's a hard no !" yelled my uncle.
" You've been through that, and judging by how you gave it to me this morning, you turned out just fine!" she described.
"TMI " I dared adding but no one cared.
" Don't even think to get away with that using flattery !" He opposed.
" Don't be such a baby, P! It's just a little needle! Besides, that'll toughen him a little ! I don't even know why people started using anaesthesia for that. " she dared saying.
" Then do it to yourself ! "Toughen him up", how dare you ? My son is tough enough, don't you dare say otherwise! Have you seen him beat the crap out of his opponents at boxing class? Oh, right, you never come to watch him fight ! " He replied.
The conversation started to get ugly so I decided to put an end to it by yelling : " GUYS, STOP FIGHTING, I HAVE A SOLUTION !"
This time, I helped them sort the problem because I built a pretty close relationships with many surgeons. I took the boy halfway across the country in his speed train, thankfully the winter break had just begun, and got him pierced literally two days after the fight between my aunt and my uncle. It also happened to be his 18th birthday. He had to cancel his birthday party and ski trip with his friends because this was literally the only option for him without having to wait another six months. It all happened on a day the surgeon was supposed to take off but a little extra money helped solve the problem. I also had to tell him that my uncle and aunt were on the brink of divorce because of that (which was clearly an exaggeration). Fast forward two days of bed rest, he was back on the high speed train back home and I got a nice bank transfer, a few months later I also got a thank you message from both parents and a reputation of a problem solver.
Please not the pun on that last picture "Au poil" ("by the hair") is a french expression to say that everything is perfectly alright. Here it's also, obviously a way to state that he's cleaner than clean, fully shaven like every boy his age "should be".
This one is literally the first time he jerked off after recovery. He sent it to me. There also a pun because his mom said "it would toughen him", "toughen" is more like "harden" in French, so the caption that came with this one was "Looks hard enough to me!". Needless to say that there were no "hard" feelings between them (pun intended).
My aunt could play matchmaker with all her friends' daughters, trying to gain points in her social circle by providing every 16 to 19 year old girl around her with a fine looking and (as you could see) tough/hard enough little boxer, but that was also a failure. Another thing her husband had forgotten to share with her was that this boy is as gay as it gets. He had told his dad years before but, by now, you might understand why he did not tell his mom, but that's a story for another time (and, I promise, it does have a happy and quite funny ending).
Anyways, my aunt contacted me directly to arrange everything when her fourth and last son's turn to get clean arrived. She was not about to let this last-minute situation happen again.
I'm currently on my sixth intervention of that kind.
So it was no surprise when I received a message from that guy, named W, who did not really know what to do and how to do it. He was 25 at the time and, like I said, wanted to propose, mostly out of love and partially out of simply wanting to get his cock serviced. He had heard that some guys did not need the snip and hoed he was one of them. I asked him to send me a picture and got this :
- WDYT?
- Bro, you're half hard and still I think you're gonna need a snip. Send me a fully soft picture.
- Who do you think you were gonna full with this ?
- At least I tried !
Of course he was just joking, he knew it and that was why he came to me in the first place. It's also an excuse for me to post before-after pictures of him.
Now, I will never criticise a guy for being particular and specific about his junk, but this one was a real pain in the ass and believe me I know what I'm talking about.
I have seen dads barging in the doctor's office with hundreds of pictures showing exactly how they feel their sons have to get cut. I have seen one pulling his own pants down and asking for "a carbon copy". Some of them ask their sons to write the full measurements (hard and soft, length and girth) as well as the length of their inner foreskin on a spreadsheet and spent half an hour talking about it with the surgeon. You might think that getting a low and tight cut is a two-minute discussion but it isn't. Even this type of cut sometimes calls for lengthy discussions, most of the time between dads and doctors, sometimes between the actual boy who's getting cut and the doctor, sometimes it's a debate between the three of them. See, it's not only a matter of health, it's also a matter of beliefs and wishes. The doctors we use are also clean guys, sometimes close friends or even relatives and they're not afraid to give their opinion, medical, ethical and personal, all three of them.
Doctor's usually don't want to give low and tight, at least the surgeon I know the best is completely against it because it can lead to problems to reach orgasm, especially when one grows old. Dads are usually against low and tight even if they, themselves got it because they think it makes it too difficult to jerk off. Young people, these days, usually want as low and tight as possible, that's a trend amongst the community. I'd say 80% to 90% of this who got done during the past 10 years got low and tight.
Then there's the question of the piercing(s) they're gonna get. That's when it gets personal. 95% of people I know got at least the same one their own fathers have, some of them another one on top of it. There is little to no debate. When the doctor asks the question, the boy is expected to answer, on his own, something like "same as Dad". The 5% remaining ones are usually sons of guys who only got a PA. PA is kind of seen as "the bare minimum of piercing", first generation guys get them because they hurt less (when they don't want or can't have it surgically done, they go to a pierced which usually doesn't provide anesthesia) but as soon as the second generation pops in, something "heavier" is expected. It also often happened that the dad got his dick re-pierced at the same time to make sure everyone in the household gets the same. I know it sounds weird to people who did not grow up this way, but it's a very strong mindset : piercings have to be the same from one generation to the other. Good thing is that this opinion is shared by dads and sons, we're all on the same page. Boys want the same piercing as their fathers and fathers want their sons to be pierced the same, no questions asked.
But W was new to it, first generation, no noisy father and, in a sense, it was even worse. He did his research and had printed out all internet had to offer reading opinions on circumcision and you guys probably know there is literally everything and its opposite that's been written on this topic online. I'll spare you the details because he had this lengthy conversation with me once and with the doctor a second time. Also, being a nudist himself, he wanted to get cut without it "being to obvious" so that his family won't ask questions. I had to let him know it was impossible for it not to be too obvious. Besides, he was going to have a metal bar with a ball on each end going through his knob so...that was going to be very obvious. He would have to talk about it with them eventually.
On top of that, he's a shower more than a grower so he took all sorts of measurements in order to decide the exact amount of skin he wanted off. He made it very clear that he wanted to keep "one or two folds of inner foreskin nicely gathered behind the corona". Last time I helped an older dude getting his cut, I just pulled down my pants and he said "that sounds about right" and got more or less the same. This was not going to cut it, pun intended. Yet, he did not have the time to betook fussy because he was planning on taking advantage of the fact that he would be appart from his girlfriend for a few months to heal and surprise her with the proposal. It had to be done in a short two-week window.
All in all he seems to be happy with the result although the happiest one is definitely his future wife. Four months after the operation (recovery for the piercing takes forever), he got naked, on his knees, proposed and she said yes.
Here's the final result :
And yes, he hasn't worn clothes inside ever since.