I'm up late tonight. The bf slept for 4 hours and is still awake. I really should be playing World of Warcraft, but he's insisting I sit downstairs with him in the kitchen.
I talked about things with him in therapy today. I'm not unhappy, but I'm not happy here either. I don't know what I'm going to do about that.
Now that my "brother" is active in my life again, I've got to figure out a way to get together with him and hang out. Trouble is, we almost always fool around when we hang. It's kind of like a routine. We don't even think about it anymore. Last time we hung out, I'd just driven 2 hours to be with him and hang out. If I go to see him again, it will be a 3 hour drive because I'm back in Bmore now. The whole thing is a problem because I'm in this relationship with the bf.
On top of that, another guy that I used to fool around with has come back into my life. He wants to "sleep" together. No sex. Yeah right.
I have to admit. The guys that have been into me have REALLY been into me. I still remember the little stud that took me home back in 99. He could have had any guy in the bar and he chose to go home with me. He was in the militiary. Don't remember his name. I wonder if he'd remember me if he saw me again? Would he even care to?
This all spells a bad situation. I'm in a strange place with the relationship with the bf and all these new external things have popped up. All I need is for Tim to show up and my nightmare will be comeplete.
I'm patiently waiting for the beginning of the year. That's when I start working out again. I'm really hoping to lose 30 pounds. I'm kinda old at 36 to get too muscular, but I think if I can get down some weight and tone up, that will be a good thing, I think.
I'm tired.
I talked about things with him in therapy today. I'm not unhappy, but I'm not happy here either. I don't know what I'm going to do about that.
Now that my "brother" is active in my life again, I've got to figure out a way to get together with him and hang out. Trouble is, we almost always fool around when we hang. It's kind of like a routine. We don't even think about it anymore. Last time we hung out, I'd just driven 2 hours to be with him and hang out. If I go to see him again, it will be a 3 hour drive because I'm back in Bmore now. The whole thing is a problem because I'm in this relationship with the bf.
On top of that, another guy that I used to fool around with has come back into my life. He wants to "sleep" together. No sex. Yeah right.
I have to admit. The guys that have been into me have REALLY been into me. I still remember the little stud that took me home back in 99. He could have had any guy in the bar and he chose to go home with me. He was in the militiary. Don't remember his name. I wonder if he'd remember me if he saw me again? Would he even care to?
This all spells a bad situation. I'm in a strange place with the relationship with the bf and all these new external things have popped up. All I need is for Tim to show up and my nightmare will be comeplete.
I'm patiently waiting for the beginning of the year. That's when I start working out again. I'm really hoping to lose 30 pounds. I'm kinda old at 36 to get too muscular, but I think if I can get down some weight and tone up, that will be a good thing, I think.
I'm tired.