I need to vent...
why is it at the age of 20 i dont know how to be happy... and that i cant remember the last time i was happy... and i know happiness is hard to get but i cant remember the last time i was content in my life.... where i said to myself i have a pretty good life... i am not saying that i have it as bad as some people out there in the world but i dont think i am asking for much... to just be content in life...
there isnt one thing i am content with in my life...
just in the last day i found out i made the biggest screw up i couldve made... i basically flunked out of college... i am still able to go but i lost my loan... so now my parents have to pay for my college this semester. AND I HATE IT AND FEEL SOOOO GUILTY!!!
and then i dont even know why i joined this site.... ive only had sex with one person and not that many times... i was a virgin until last june... and in someways i regret having sex with the guy i had sex with but i dont regret it being him... i know that dont make much since but it does to me... and now he hates me and doesnt want to talk to me... because i was naive to think that i could have a fuck buddy relationship with the guy i lost my virginity too... and i tried to control him
and i aint no size 2 i aint even a size 8... i aint going to say what size i am but ill just say im a size 12... and i will never be a size 2 and i know it... is it that much to ask for a guy to like me for more then what i look like... i know looks are important and that you need to be attracted to someone to have a relationship work but how can a guy say " what would my friends think" when you dated someone the exact same size as me before and they didnt care... or shortly after meeting you calling you and saying that he doesnt wanna talk to you because you werent what he wants and literally tells you its because of your weight... when he is a big guy too
idk i just needed to vent
why is it at the age of 20 i dont know how to be happy... and that i cant remember the last time i was happy... and i know happiness is hard to get but i cant remember the last time i was content in my life.... where i said to myself i have a pretty good life... i am not saying that i have it as bad as some people out there in the world but i dont think i am asking for much... to just be content in life...
there isnt one thing i am content with in my life...
just in the last day i found out i made the biggest screw up i couldve made... i basically flunked out of college... i am still able to go but i lost my loan... so now my parents have to pay for my college this semester. AND I HATE IT AND FEEL SOOOO GUILTY!!!
and then i dont even know why i joined this site.... ive only had sex with one person and not that many times... i was a virgin until last june... and in someways i regret having sex with the guy i had sex with but i dont regret it being him... i know that dont make much since but it does to me... and now he hates me and doesnt want to talk to me... because i was naive to think that i could have a fuck buddy relationship with the guy i lost my virginity too... and i tried to control him
and i aint no size 2 i aint even a size 8... i aint going to say what size i am but ill just say im a size 12... and i will never be a size 2 and i know it... is it that much to ask for a guy to like me for more then what i look like... i know looks are important and that you need to be attracted to someone to have a relationship work but how can a guy say " what would my friends think" when you dated someone the exact same size as me before and they didnt care... or shortly after meeting you calling you and saying that he doesnt wanna talk to you because you werent what he wants and literally tells you its because of your weight... when he is a big guy too
idk i just needed to vent