My girlfriend and I have been very non-sexual for the past few months. We make love sporadically, maybe once every 2 or 3 weeks. It's killing me with her lack of sexual interest.
She is very reserved and doesn't share much. When we have talked sex, which she seemed to enjoy doing for the first few months we went out, I shared my fantasies and desires more than she did. She did tell me that she went a little wild in college but didn't tell me what she did. I haven't pursued it, but I am still curious about what she did. Why not share what if she told me she did wild things?
She still likes to hold hands and seems to enjoy cuddling, but I am always the one to initiate it. Now, I know that she reads erotic romance novels and stories, she has many books like that and has a couple dozen on her computer. I stumbled across them and she doesn't know I know. So it bothers me that sexually she is not interested hardly at all, but I know that she reads these. Wouldn't that make her desire for me stronger?
She says her desire is for me (though in many of the books it's more than 1 guy at a time taking the woman) but yet she rarely is in the mood for sex. It didn't used to be like this. Did she put on a charade at first to get me hooked and wants to keep me cuz I'm a good guy? Her closed-ness and reservedness is hard for me because I need a woman to be open. I'm a sappy guy that has to have his soul connect with my partner. And sexually is one of the strongest ways I share that.
So at what point is a relationship sexually dead and you cut out because you're not happy? How do you do so when you do love and care about the other person?
She is very reserved and doesn't share much. When we have talked sex, which she seemed to enjoy doing for the first few months we went out, I shared my fantasies and desires more than she did. She did tell me that she went a little wild in college but didn't tell me what she did. I haven't pursued it, but I am still curious about what she did. Why not share what if she told me she did wild things?
She still likes to hold hands and seems to enjoy cuddling, but I am always the one to initiate it. Now, I know that she reads erotic romance novels and stories, she has many books like that and has a couple dozen on her computer. I stumbled across them and she doesn't know I know. So it bothers me that sexually she is not interested hardly at all, but I know that she reads these. Wouldn't that make her desire for me stronger?
She says her desire is for me (though in many of the books it's more than 1 guy at a time taking the woman) but yet she rarely is in the mood for sex. It didn't used to be like this. Did she put on a charade at first to get me hooked and wants to keep me cuz I'm a good guy? Her closed-ness and reservedness is hard for me because I need a woman to be open. I'm a sappy guy that has to have his soul connect with my partner. And sexually is one of the strongest ways I share that.
So at what point is a relationship sexually dead and you cut out because you're not happy? How do you do so when you do love and care about the other person?