100% straight, love my mum, have nice teeth and nice shoes, want girl for my 8.5"

Discussion in 'Large Penis Personal Ads' started by Toby1972, Oct 10, 2006.

  1. Toby1972

    Toby1972 New Member

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    Dear all (mainly focused on educated female population of Greater London under 33),

    As pointed out in the title, I’m a 100% straight easy going guy with lots of qualities, which I like to sum up in “I love my mum, have nice teeth and nice shoes, and would like to get to know a girl who can appreciate my 8.5, stamina, and humor".

    As I’ve got a pretty international background, I’d love to hook up with a special girl who can understand that not everybody’s first language is English (although I speak it fluently) and that fish and chips is not the crown of creation.

    I’d actually love to truly get to know a special girl, and yes this involves conversation slash communication (something I am actually capable of and enjoy).
    Here, special girl, my proposals on how we could achieve this total understanding as a pre-condition of total orgasmic bliss or ideally true love (not joking!) if we turn out to be from different nationalities - please note that while I try to accommodate the widest possible range of backgrounds, I am ultimately interested in getting to know one special woman, not in mass dating :
    - I’ve noted in the past that my efforts to switch to binary, Hexadecimal or base64 was not very popular in Brussels and Barcelona where I lived before moving to London. Too bad. So let's create our own international language then:
    - Instead of using Finish, French, German, Italian, semaphore, morse code or any computer related language, dear interested female I propose to use English as a common basis and adapt it to our different cultures. We can start with replacing the soft "c" with "s". Sertainly, this will make you Finnish beauty happy. I can now imagine your growing enthusiasm with my sekond sugestion to drop he hard "c" in favour of "k" to please Johana and her German girl-friends. This should klear up konfusion and we will kommunikate much faster as we will have one less letter to use on our keyboards. Then, to fasilitate the life of the frog girls who barely kan speak English, I propose to replace the troublesome "ph" with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter. If you would agree, we kan then fokus on more komplikated changes to please an Italian lady and enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away. Ultimately, we kan replase "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". Ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza.

    Interestet? Sen rait or imeil me to “yournirvana@hotmail.com”

    Yours,
    Toby
     
  2. Toby1972

    Toby1972 New Member

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    Wud also leik to point out cliirli (!!!) the following to the much appreciated gay community who might read my intro:

    I absolutely accept your preferences in terms of partners!
    However, I have noted on this site that a lot of replies, approaches, and offers with sexual content to men who characterise themselves as 100% straight.
    I expect some understanding from you guys that in my case 100% straight means "hundred percent straight". I do have no inclination nor slightest interest to be ever tempted nor to try anything with a man.
    So please, please, do accept this and do not approach nor write to me with any evangelistic intentions.

    Thank you very much!
     
  3. naughty_girl

    naughty_girl New Member

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    lol... hmm im guessing u had alot of spare time on your hands whilst writing that! :tongue: so where r the pics then?! :biggrin1: :biggrin1: :biggrin1:
     
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