20 and still a virgin.

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Hakunamatata, Aug 21, 2009.

  1. Hakunamatata

    Hakunamatata New Member

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    Okay, I am 20 y. old and still a virgin. I've been making out but that is about it. When it comes to something serious I just run away. I actually think i will never have sex because I am too scared to do it :mad:
    Maybe this could be because I am not exactly sure do I wanna lose virginity with a guy or a girl ? I am still all confused about my sexuality even though guys in my age already know their sexual orientation.
    Any advices ?
     
  2. roamingapril

    roamingapril New Member

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  3. Hakunamatata

    Hakunamatata New Member

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  4. OCMuscleJock

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    dude...nothing wrong with being a virgin at 20... I waited till I was 22. *then got molested by the preachers daughter.* lol but still...nothing wrong with waiting, especially if it doesn't feel right to you. You will know when it's the right time ...no need to rush it.
     
  5. danimal32

    danimal32 Member

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    Don't pressure yourself, just take one step at a time. And give yourself some time to think about what it is that scares you. The first time you have sex it may not be the stellar performance that you might like it to be, but just like anything, practice makes perfect. If you picked up a sport like golf today and play regularly, your score will improve over time. Don't put yourself on a strict time table - you've got the rest of your life ahead of you. Not every guy your age knows his sexual orientation - there are many people that are conflicted for a long time beyond the age of 20. Consider speaking to someone that you trust if you have questions.
     
  6. B_Marcus50

    B_Marcus50 New Member

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    Women don't have the patience for that. It doesn't matter if you're a virgin or not, because if you don't perform perfectly the first or second time you have sex with her, she will dump you and find someone else.
    Sad, but true.
     
  7. ninfan2005

    ninfan2005 Member

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    i was virgin till 19 no biggy take ur time man. figure things out and have fun.
     
  8. D_Jared Padalicki

    D_Jared Padalicki Account Disabled

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    Sometimes it can be important to loose your virginity and there can be the personal pressure.
     
  9. D_Landrocke DeLonguepiece III

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    If you are too scared then that just means you are not ready and/or you haven't found the right person. Don't worry about it. I lost my virginity at 24.
     
  10. dolfette

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    the big 'i need to lose my virginity!' issue should come second to the big 'i really love you and want to start getting physical' issue.
     
  11. D_Jared Padalicki

    D_Jared Padalicki Account Disabled

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    Not true, most of the times it is better to get experience in having sex without the extra pressure that a relationship can give.
     
  12. OCMuscleJock

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    that is true to an extent Pieterjoke...however, if he's not ready and it goes badly..it can have psycological effects on him that will resurface everytime he has sex or tries to have sex....in turn which could cause erectile dysfunction. NO ONE needs that! :) NOW...if he is comfortable with a friend...and talks to them and they have the kind of friendship where they can experiment together without the strings of a relationship...now that would be a choice way to go... My first time with a guy was with a friend that was also curious...
     
  13. luka82

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    Just relax!
     
  14. D_Humper E Bogart

    D_Humper E Bogart New Member

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    Perhaps you need to hang around with peop[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]le you fee[/FONT][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]l more comfotab[/FONT][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]le with? You don't need a sexua[/FONT][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]l identity set in stone, be coo[/FONT][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]l and be with everyone who cares about you.[/FONT]
     
  15. D_Tina_Ciao

    D_Tina_Ciao Account Disabled

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    Take your time - there's no rush. You're young and your whole life lies ahead of you. Don't mess it up by getting emotional or psychological scars from decisions made before you were ready for them.

    Allow yourself to simmer in different situations and your sexuality will surface by your feeling an undeniable attraction. If the situation is comfortable and the time is right, it will happen soon enough.

    I stayed a virgin until I got married and so did my husband, but we were from another generation. Follow your spirit's leading - don't let anyone push you before you're ready - you have nothing to make excuses or apologize for. Be true to yourself.
    :thinkerg:
     
    #15 D_Tina_Ciao, Aug 21, 2009
    Last edited: Aug 21, 2009
  16. D_Penruddick Middlefinger

    D_Penruddick Middlefinger Account Disabled

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    Well, if you hire a professional, you'll never have a shorter relationship, that's fo' sho!:smile:

    In all seriousness, it's not a career move. Just wrap that rascal and enjoy! You want to sample guys, you can do that too. Then you can decide one way or the other or, like most of the horny bastiges I know, you can opt to be sexually non-committal for the rest of your life and have sexuals with whomever you choose.
     
  17. hud01

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    Don't run away from it run to it. Are you mixing sex with a serious relationship?

    It will happen when you are ready and find the right partner. At 20 there is no reason you can't try both sides to see if one suits you more physically. Of course in a relationship, there are many more variables.

    Sex should never scare you, it should excite you. It is just sex, something hopefully you will be doing for the next 30 to 50 years.
     
  18. D_Tina_Ciao

    D_Tina_Ciao Account Disabled

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    Ah, imho, that should be until death (possible even for men in some fashion).........and there's no such thing as "just" sex, or there shouldn't be. If that's all it is, something's being missed out on! :rolleyes:
     
  19. Hakunamatata

    Hakunamatata New Member

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    Thanks guys, I kinda feel better now.
     
  20. B_pressuretreated

    B_pressuretreated New Member

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    i was 20 when i lost my virginity, i was pretty much the same(not bi tho), i had dated a few girls and fooled around with them, but just never had sex, and i'm glad i didn't cause looking back i didn't like any of those girls that much anyway, they were fun girls, just not for me, then i started talking to a girl from back in school and we became smitten with each other, we had sex and we've been together ever since. Not every guy is out there trying to be peg every piece of ass they see, and u don't have to feel obligated to do the same, or feel bad because you don't do that. I will say though once i finally did have sex, it was awesome haha.
     
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