$3M NIH Grant to UIC to Study Lesbian Drinking

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by Principessa, Jul 26, 2009.

  1. Principessa

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    $3M NIH grant to UIC to study lesbian drinking




    Silly me, I thought lesbians drank for the same reasons as everybody else. :rolleyes: Apparently they don't drink because they are thirsty, need to relax, unwind, or maybe lesbians just like the cute little umbrellas in pina coladas. I hope $3,000,000.00 is enough to figure this out. I wonder if they will need to pay lesbians to drink? :confused:
     
  2. Mem

    Mem
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    Foe $1 million I will reveal to the researchers that they like drinking clam juice.
     
  3. Flashy

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    this is the kind of idiocy that makes you wonder about why anyone would want to turn over any more control over anything to the government

    this grant could provide 100 uninsured folks health care coverage for 10 years.

    :rolleyes:

    way to go government.
     
  4. Principessa

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    Oh come on Flashy, this is serious! What if gay men are born that way; but women only become lesbians because they drink too much? :rolleyes: What if some looney tune uses this study to stop women from drinking?!?:eek:
     
  5. jason_els

    jason_els <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    You think that's odd??

    One of my friends has a federal research grant of $2.8 million to study the effects of serotonin and norepinephrine on species of social spiders. He has two control groups of spiders. One is being fed Prozac and another is being fed Mazindol. This will supposedly help determine why some spiders are aggressive toward other spiders and why others are not.

    That's all it's supposed to do. I love my friend dearly and scientific advancement is a hallmark of civilization and it's good to expand the horizons of human knowledge, but what the fuck this research is good for to warrant a federal grant, I have no idea. There is only one species of social spider in the US and they're not even a threat or used for commercial purposes.

    I have not shared my skepticism with my friend.
     
  6. Principessa

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    Am I supposed to be worried about depressed spiders now? Cause quite frankly I just don't have the time. :cool:
     
  7. Pendlum

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    Man, I could afford to go to college with some of that money. :(
     
  8. D_Selmus_Swallow

    D_Selmus_Swallow Account Disabled

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    Looks like all I need is a sweet grant proposal and then I am on a gravy train for life!
     
  9. swedish fish88

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    Sigh... if only I was a lesbian woman... college would be paid for, have money set aside for in case shit happens... life is so unfair.
     
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