A History of Promiscuity - Is it a Turn Off?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by earllogjam, Nov 7, 2007.

  1. earllogjam

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    When you find out a person has the reputation of being promiscuous does it knock them down a few pegs on the desirablilty scale in your book?

    Does your perception of them change overnight?

    Or is a non-issue that would not affect your attraction to someone one way or the other?
     
  2. SpoiledPrincess

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    It wouldn't worry me unless I felt that their promiscuity was in some way caused by insecurity - I wouldn't like to have to deal with a mass of insecurities. What someone's done in the past (unless it's something criminal) is in the past and they'd be with me now, and the relationship between the two of us would be all that mattered. If they were promiscuous I'd assume they had their own reasons for it, whether they simply enjoyed sex, they were on a voyage of sexual self discovery or had simply not met someone they wanted to stay with.
     
  3. 36DD

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    I feel it is not my place to judge as I do not walk in their shoes and I would hate someone to hold that against me...I think it is rather shallow.
     
  4. SyddyKitty

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    Depends on how long I've known them prior. A few days and yea, they're still open to early impressions so they go down far. People always have time to redeem themselves in other ways. A few months or years and it's just something you live with.
     
  5. sdbg

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    In general, no. I'm all for people getting their rocks off as long as they are safe and responsible in the process. Each of us needs to enjoy the body that we were given, whether alone or with someone. A reputation for being promiscuous might be an obstacle for entering into a committed relationship, though.
     
  6. 36DD

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    People have varying ideas of what is considered promiscuous.
     
  7. Principessa

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    If I really felt there was chemistry between us I may keep him at arms length to see if he has calmed down at all. Promiscuity wouldn't affect my attraction so much as it would my actions. Assuming this is a 100% straight man whom I really, really like I would take it very slow and get to know him. Plus call in a few markers to do a mini-background check (I've done this with guys who weren't promisuous; but gave me a weird vibe). My main concern would be STD's how many times has he had the clap?

     
  8. 36DD

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  9. Drifterwood

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    Not at all, I find it far more strange to restrict your natural sexual needs because of some arbitrary moral code.
     
  10. SereneBlue

    SereneBlue New Member

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    I admit if I found out a guy I was seeing had a large number of lovers in his past it would change how I view him. I'd stop seeing him. I've told several men in my past that I didn't want to see them anymore - and their promiscuity was the reason why. A large number of lovers would signal to me this is not a man I want to be involved with for anything more than a passing acquaintance.

    I prefer to try to play it safe and not get involved with men who have Player/Womanizer tendencies. I may not always be successful protecting myself from such men but I will try to do what I can.
     
  11. SpoiledPrincess

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    Promiscuity wouldn't bother me, infidelity would.
     
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  12. B_ScaredLittleBoy

    B_ScaredLittleBoy New Member

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    Interesting question. I was recently turned off from someone, when there was a 'clue' to their promiscuity, not confirmation, but implication.

    But if this was a new girl, I wouldn't mind. Everyone has a history. My sexual history is quite brief but quite eventful. Vomit, shrinking testicles, STD scare, obesity, goths are just some of the features.

    SP makes a good point. Its okay if they were promiscuous before [they met me] but faithfulness is important. If you're not mine, then I'm not yours :tongue:
    It would really annoy me and dishearten me.
     
  13. jason_els

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    What ^she^ said.
     
  14. 3664shaken

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    Having been labeled promiscuous and other salty terms in the past I cannot really judge other people without some sort of hypocrisy. But I have found that most people who say they are turned off by someone&#8217;s past usually fall into three categories.

    #1 &#8211; Religious beliefs
    #2 &#8211; Fear of disease
    #3 &#8211; Feelings of insecurity about their sexual ability.

    #1 can be a problem, but to be honest I don&#8217;t usually attract those type of people, and btw, should they not be the forgiving type.

    #2 can usually be taken care of with proving that you are disease free

    #3 well that&#8217;s there problem and I don&#8217;t want to be their Dr. Phil.

    On the personal side, I have found that the more experience (within reason) a person has the better they are in bed. Sex is a sport and the more you practice the better you get.
     
  15. goodwood

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    If a person has a known and/or admitted history of promiscuity, that in no way effects my thought of them as a potential partner other than health wise. If they have been careful and are healthy then I hope that all the people they slept with were good and that they learned something. My most recent ex was concerned that I would think badly of her for her promiscuity. I absolutely did not and when I told her of how many times I had been around the block, we decided that we were perfectly suited. Although she was not nearly as promiscuous as she seemed to think. I am all for as much sex as anyone can have and enjoy and be safe while doing so.
     
  16. TheRob

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    well by promiscuity, do you mean all the way to the point of cheating on people
    cus that I'd hate
     
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  17. 36DD

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  18. B_Swimming Lad

    B_Swimming Lad New Member

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    Promiscuity can sometimes be a turn on for me. Its good to bang a slut.
     
  19. Lucky_Luke

    Lucky_Luke New Member

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    I have no problem with those who are single and promiscuous.

    Its the ones that are promiscuous when they are not single that I find a huge turn off and would avoid them like the plague. If there is even a rumor that a person fooled around on their mate in the past, that would be a guarenteed 'deal-breaker' to me.
     
  20. D_Roland_D_Hay

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    I wouldn't hold that against a person...it is a label and I don't like labels. I can't judge anyone until I have walked in their shoes. Sounds corny but I don't know what caused their behavior or if it is actually true. When I am attracted to someone I accept that person for who he or she is.
     
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