A little advice, please? Am I bastard, or is my girlfriend crazy?

[dolfette]

She stopped when he had indicated that he would like some oral at that stage of the sex which had already included oral on her.

she usually gives head enthusiastically.
it seems she got upset when he asked why.

 

[nicenycdick]

Did you miss the part when he said that he had already given her oral?

No..I didn't. And I didn't say that she was acting rationally at the moment. I just said that this type of behaviour reveals some deeper issue.

And did you notice that his statement about giving her oral was an afterthought. Just saying...

 

[Drifterwood]

Stopping was the first thing, reacting to the why was the second.

You can't be wanting to have a go at someone for asking why someone reacts in an unusual manner? Do you think he should have just grunted and gone back to fucking her?

 

[D_Fiona_Farvel]

No..I didn't. And I didn't say that she was acting rationally at the moment. I just said that this type of behaviour reveals some deeper issue.

And did you notice that his statement about giving her oral was an afterthought. Just saying...

You are so sensitive.
I was thinking he should be glad she took her crazy ass home that night. :biggrin1:

 

[Drifterwood]

No..I didn't. And I didn't say that she was acting rationally at the moment. I just said that this type of behaviour reveals some deeper issue. ..

I agree, but let's not expect a guy to be psychic at five in the morning after a night out with booze and spliff.

I wonder whether her issue(s) were just part of the moment or something he should be worried about.

 

[nicenycdick]

Drifterwood, If you're referring to me: I'm not having a go at anyone. He asked for help in understanding why it happened. I'm not sure he could have done anything differently that night. I am not condemning him or her. And I applaud his need to find out why.

 

[Not_Punny]

Yes, he should have just grunted and gone back to it.

There are moments where neanderthalism wins, and conversation is pointless.

I do NOT always give explantions when I say no. And I don't ask for them. The OP obviously has never swung.

No means no means no.

 

[nicenycdick]

This episode is only important if there is a deeper issue here. Otherwise...forget about it. But find out.

 

[Not_Punny]

I will say that her reaction was extreme.

What we don't know is what their relationship is in general. There could be many issues.

 

[Drifterwood]

Drifterwood, If you're referring to me: I'm not having a go at anyone. He asked for help in understanding why it happened. I'm not sure he could have done anything differently that night. I am not condemning him or her. And I applaud his need to find out why.

No, I was talking to Dolfie. :smile:

 

[dolfette]

Stopping was the first thing, reacting to the why was the second.

You can't be wanting to have a go at someone for asking why someone reacts in an unusual manner? Do you think he should have just grunted and gone back to fucking her?

she hesitated and said she didn't want to. the correct reaction to a lover doing that is to wrap your arms around them as though it really doesn't matter, because being with them is wonderful with or without it.
it's what i'd do. and i'm great, so it must be right.
if i thought it was something that needed to be talked out then i'd bring it up later, when we're both relaxed and there's no pressure...but that wouldn't be my instant reaction, because everyone is intitled to not be in the mood sometimes.

 

[Drifterwood]

I'll bet you a pair of Jimmy Choo to a BJ that she had already cum and he hadn't.

 

[Enid]

Hey Scotsman - I see things a bit differently than the other girls on here. It sounds like you guys have a pretty open sexual relationship and you didn't do anything out of the norm to warrant an apology. She told you how she wanted it, why can't you do the same??? If anything she needs to apologize to you for being a baby about the situation. If she was upset she should have communicated it to you like an adult -NOT pouting on the sofa. She should take you wanting head from her as a compliment. You compromised and had sex when you were tired and wanting sleep. You did it how she wanted and she (and the girls on here) have the nerve to say there could possibly be a titch selfish. REALLY people?! Hahaha, thankfully I am usually thinking rationally. However if that were the case, the other 2 dozen girls commenting on here would think the same way. Unfortunately that isn't the case. Its hard being part of a rare breed given a bad name by drama queens. Oh well ...

Actually several other women commented that they thought she probably over-reacted.

 

[dolfette]

I'll bet you a pair of Jimmy Choo to a BJ that she had already cum and he hadn't.

and?
he can only cum once, so if you're going to shag then you're not going to get him off first.
he said she's always been enthusiastic about it in the past, so why is her not wanting to that time an injustice?

...and why are women's orgasms something to be got out of the way before proper sex? and why is the end of sex decided by when he cums?

 

[Drifterwood]

I didn't imply any of those things.

There's a difference between advice and an opinion on an issue relative to one's own baggage.

 

[dolfette]

I didn't imply any of those things.

There's a difference between advice and an opinion on an issue relative to one's own baggage.

i did the opinion thing earlier. it was a good opinion.
he posted that the thread had been a great help.

now i'm just bickering with you and i'm allowed to bring baggage into it.

 

[_Alexxx_]

Think it the other way. What answer to the question "Why don't you want to go down on me today?" would have lead to continue the good sex session that was going on?

- Because I don't feel like it : OK you knew that, so "why?" is not answered, would you ask more? or continue with the same doubt/lack of info/pissed off?
- Because last time I did you did something I didn't like: uh-oh... This is going to take a while and will be a cooler for few days probably
- Because there is something that puts me off right now about sucking you: hmm... sounds like a problem
- Because I always do it and you almost never do that other thing that I like so much: problems around!!!
- ... ?

I'd rather ask about the colour of the new curtains, at least a "fuck the curtains" would'nt break anything

If you want to know why, wait until the next morning while you are having breakfast or something.

 

[dolfette]

Think it the other way. What answer to the question "Why don't you want to go down on me today?" would have lead to continue the good sex session that was going on?

- Because I don't feel like it : OK you knew that, so "why?" is not answered, would you ask more? or continue with the same doubt/lack of info/pissed off?
- Because last time I did you did something I didn't like: uh-oh... This is going to take a while and will be a cooler for few days probably
- Because there is something that puts me off right now about sucking you: hmm... sounds like a problem
- Because I always do it and you almost never do that other thing that I like so much: problems around!!!
- ... ?

I'd rather ask about the colour of the new curtains, at least a "fuck the curtains" would'nt break anything

If you want to know why, wait until the next morning while you are having breakfast or something.

^^^see?

 

[eyescream]

Happened to me. It's not that she doesn't like giving blow jobs I'm sure she does. It's just that at the time, she wanted to have sex and probably wanted to get off on you. She was probably on her way to getting off when you motioned for her to give you a blow job and that's most likely what got her pissed off.

I went out with a guy who loved it when I'd go down on him that everytime we spent time together that's all he wanted to do. After a while we were having very little sex and I was doing all the 'taking care of' so I stopped going down on him altogether and started screwing someone else.

Anyway, if you like plenty of blow jobs just remember to have plenty of sex too because it's always a give and take thing. Our clits and g-spot aren't in our mouths.

I agree with some of the women in here, you should apologize.

 

[Drifterwood]

and?
he can only cum once, so if you're going to shag then you're not going to get him off first.
he said she's always been enthusiastic about it in the past, so why is her not wanting to that time an injustice?

...and why are women's orgasms something to be got out of the way before proper sex? and why is the end of sex decided by when he cums?

OK, I'll play.

I'm 40 and I can still cum 3 to 5 times, though I prefer to be a sniper. He is much younger than me I think. Of course if you like your sex to last five minutes then of course.

It's not an injustice, it's a mood killer to a sensitive guy.

Get them out of the way? With women who can really let go, it is a great pleasure for many men to help them achieve that, particularly if you are orally inclined. It's peak Vs plateau.

Who says it has to be the end? Stick a slim vibrator up his ass hard.

There is though an evolutionary argument that says that men fall asleep afterwards so that you can go and fuck more potential mates. I believe that this is what Chimps do.