a question for gay men.....

[D_Relentless Original]

Please re-read the original post, and note the general derisive bitter tone and usage of words like "flamer" and "disgusting"

Yes and the point is?.

 

[concupisys]

damn you guys are a tough crowd.... faggy guys are not evil and i don't have issues with men being domesticated.... the issue here is the fact that in gay culture, there is too much being broadcast from column A and not enough being broadcast in column B.... it's enough to confuse even the smartest of people.... what's baffling me the most here is the fact that nobody seems to be getting the point....

share stories of how this affected you and share opinions regarding this matter.... if anything, the flaming responses i've gotten to this thread so far has scared off anyone who has anything remotely constructive to add to this thread....

and as the 15 year old prostitute said on maury povich last week: YOU DON'T KNOW ME....

if you want to know, then why not ask?

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

actually, i said "i think anal sex is one of the most disgusting things a human being could ever experience"....

that's me expressing my opinion.... ergo: I THINK....

do you work in mass media hilaire? because you just misconstrued my words for your own purposes and to stir up controversy....

edit....

Where did you get this idea that just because something is an opinion that it's suddenly no longer offensive? Besides you didn't just say "I don't like Anal Sex, it's not for me." you said you thought it was one of the most disgusting things a human being could experience, therefore you broadened that from you to every human being on earth, right? I'm in no way "misconstruing" you there, perhaps you should think more carefully about what you're saying next time.

No I don't work in the mass media Sherlock, I'm just an ordinary gay guy who objects to your nasty judgements about my sex life and wishes you'd kept them to yourself thanks.

 

[TomCat84]

opcorn:

If you wanted a show, all you have to do is ask me :tongue:

 

[TomCat84]

Yes and the point is?.

That he is judging

 

[concupisys]

you know what hilaire?

the fact that i'm stirring up such a controversy with this thread makes ME THINK it should have been started ages ago.... i'm sorry we don't agree, but i'll be damned if i'm not allowed to have my opinion on the matter or a public forum to discuss it....

if you want to be negative and call me names, that's your choice and the world is reading.... they will come to their own conclusions.... in no way have i directed hate to a specific person here and if i choose to call anyone an asshole i will do it in private....

 

[D_Harvey Schmeckel]

actually, i said "i think anal sex is one of the most disgusting things a human being could ever experience"....

that's me expressing my opinion.... ergo: I THINK....

Sorry but calling it an opinion and thinking does not make it so. It's a feeling, an extreme feeling of disgust. People spew sexual disgust in this forum almost on a daily basis, and it almost always annoys people.

 

[D_Relentless Original]

That he is judging

Ok then Tom, now when you roll your eyes at me in future, make sure you put mascara on them :biggrin1:

 

[TomCat84]

you know what hilaire?

the fact that i'm stirring up such a controversy with this thread makes ME THINK it should have been started ages ago.... i'm sorry we don't agree, but i'll be damned if i'm not allowed to have my opinion on the matter or a public forum to discuss it....

if you want to be negative and call me names, that's your choice and the world is reading.... they will come to their own conclusions.... in no way have i directed hate to a specific person here and if i choose to call anyone an asshole i will do it in private....

NO ONE is objecting to your choice/non choice of sexual practices. We are objecting to the derisive, bitter, and judgmental tone you take when announcing your preferences.

 

[TomCat84]

Ok then Tom, now when you roll your eyes at me in future, make sure you put mascara on them :biggrin1:

Good thing my skin is horribly allergic to makeup :biggrin1:

 

[D_Relentless Original]

Good thing my skin is horribly allergic to makeup :biggrin1:

LOL, cheers fella.

 

[concupisys]

well then tomcat, let me make a fact known to you:

this thread is not about me specifically... it's about people who feel like i do sharing their opinions and stories in a public forum where (i hope) intelligent people would have something meaningful to say....

if you want to hate me specifically, then send me a message calling me an asshole.... i'm 29 posts in to this thread and have not called you a name.... and yet i'm supposed to take your negative comments directed at ME SPECIFICALLY seriously?

dude....

 

[Lex]

concupisys - People who hate us don't care if you don't take it up the ass, that I am muscled, or that either of us might seem butcher than their closed-minded expectations of gay men. To them, we are equally revolting and equally gay.

The sooner you realize this and stop perpetuating a polarization amongst gay men that is based on self-loathing and an extreme confusion between the ideas of masculine and heterosexual, the better. All men and all women are both masculine and feminine to varying degrees, regardless of orientation.

You use terms like "faggy guys", "Flamers," and you want people to take you seriously? Dude, using those terms in that way just shows us how much you despise yourself.

Learn to love yourself and I promise you will feel MUCH better with time. Once you are comfortable in your own skin, you may not feel so much derision against those who you feel are more camp than you or those who sexual preferences differ from your own.

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

damn you guys are a tough crowd.... faggy guys are not evil and i don't have issues with men being domesticated.... the issue here is the fact that in gay culture, there is too much being broadcast from column A and not enough being broadcast in column B.... it's enough to confuse even the smartest of people.... what's baffling me the most here is the fact that nobody seems to be getting the point....

I don't see that being the case, gay culture still isn't mainstream so it isn't actually being broadcast anywhere, and in fact the big gay cultural trends of right now (as opposed to 20 years ago) are entirely anti the stereotype you're describing. If anything those gay men who do enjoy being artistic or creative, or who are naturally camp are facing unfair criticism for letting the side down as some gay men see it, by not being "normal" and "straight acting".

share stories of how this affected you and share opinions regarding this matter.... if anything, the flaming responses i've gotten to this thread so far has scared off anyone who has anything remotely constructive to add to this thread....

and as the 15 year old prostitute said on maury povich last week: YOU DON'T KNOW ME....

if you want to know, then why not ask?

If you mean there might be one less thread which goes on page after page criticising camp gay men or any gay man not prepared or able to pretend to be what others think is "normal" well frankly that's a good thing. If you think the mass media has any interest in influencing you or any other gay man in to being whatever you think they want you to be then you clearly don't live in the real world, gay men are still massively under represented in any way in a mass media context and gay women even less so.

If your cultural reference points are Maury Povich I am beginning to get how your surmises are so off.

 

[TomCat84]

well then tomcat, let me make a fact known to you:

this thread is not about me specifically... it's about people who feel like i do sharing their opinions and stories in a public forum where (i hope) intelligent people would have something meaningful to say....

if you want to hate me specifically, then send me a message calling me an asshole.... i'm 29 posts in to this thread and have not called you a name.... and yet i'm supposed to take your negative comments directed at ME SPECIFICALLY seriously?

dude....

I haven't called you a name either, yet you HAVE used "flamer"...not at me specifically, but it's still offensive. I don't hate you- I'm simply suggesting ways in which you can stop getting flak. There are ways you can set yourself apart w/o sounding bitter and aggressive. Don't whine and complain about negative posts in your thread when your OP is full of negative comments. Just sayin!

 

[concupisys]

thank you lex; i will heed what you said.... i am always open to constructive criticism.... the wording of my OP was probably made in haste after 3 proofreads, but i stand by it.... if anything, i'm happy that albeit negative, this dialogue has been started....

 

[Lex]

...

this thread is not about me specifically...

You started the thread with your own stated opinions on specific topics. How is this thread not about you? How can you say you are speaking for others?

That would be like me trying to say I speak for gay Black men in America.

it's about people who feel like i do sharing their opinions and stories in a public forum where (i hope) intelligent people would have something meaningful to say....
...

Oh, I see. You just wanted people who AGREED with you to respond and post. That's SO not how message board work.

 

[Lex]

thank you lex; i will heed what you said.... i am always open to constructive criticism.... the wording of my OP was probably made in haste after 3 proofreads, but i stand by it.... if anything, i'm happy that albeit negative, this dialogue has been started....

I think some of the frustration you are feeling from other members is based here. You have not started a new dialogue. You are perpetuating an old debate that many seem to find tiresome.

I'm not trying to attack you. I am simply trying to point out where and how you have elicited this reaction.

And NudeYorker - I don't see anything in this thread that bears reporting, although I THANK YOU for opening telling people to cool down. I'd pop a nut if you gave examples of posts here that bordered on the edge (from where you stand).

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

you know what hilaire?

the fact that i'm stirring up such a controversy with this thread makes ME THINK it should have been started ages ago.... i'm sorry we don't agree, but i'll be damned if i'm not allowed to have my opinion on the matter or a public forum to discuss it....

if you want to be negative and call me names, that's your choice and the world is reading.... they will come to their own conclusions.... in no way have i directed hate to a specific person here and if i choose to call anyone an asshole i will do it in private....

Hey, hold on just a damned minute here, I never once called you any names mate, I'm pissed off with the deeply offensive things you've said about what I and many other people do in bed and I'm tired of reading threads after thread after thread on this site in which gay men accuse "faggy gay guys" of being the root of all calamity for every "normal" acting gay guy.

At no point have I called you any names, not once, not even obliquely.

 

[concupisys]

um, hello.... i never thought specifically about anyone.... i asked that people share their stories and opinions on the matter.... it's everyone else (it seems) on this thread that are being judgemental....

like, to all members of LPSG: i'm so happy that you all got to be gay and come out such well adjusted people.... i didn't, and i have the balls to talk about it.... if you want to spread hate because of that, i can't do anything about it.... what irks me is the lack of sensitivity people seem to be having.... as if who you are is easy.... it's not easy.... and i created a space for people to discuss it.... and you have the audacity to make me feel bad?