A question on Turn-Offs...please respond...thanks.

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by kc_showman, Dec 21, 2010.

?

Ladies: the biggest turn-off in a male (phallic dimensions notwithstanding)

  1. Size - he's a big boy, as in "Lock the refrigerator!" big.

    1 vote(s)
    4.5%
  2. Smoking - pack a day, and he's got the cough and lingering scent.

    11 vote(s)
    50.0%
  3. Clothing - "...but I like the same ratty things I wear day in and day out..."

    1 vote(s)
    4.5%
  4. Personality - "uh...(two minute pause)...hi."

    9 vote(s)
    40.9%
  1. kc_showman

    kc_showman New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2006
    Messages:
    7
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Hi there...

    In the spirit of helping convince someone who really needs convincing, I come bearing a query. I'm hoping this would be the right place to ask this question, as it's not so much dealing with a large penis in particular, but to the entire life-support system for said member.

    I'm curious about an odd subject - turn-off's. In this case, penis size is only tangentally relevant.

    For the sake of arguement, let's say there is a medium-large phallus in question, to the large side of thickness but average in length. Okay, that said, let's deal with the person attached to that penis.

    Of four traits, dealing with the guy as a whole, which of these would you consider the *biggest* turn-off:

    1 - Size (the guy himself, not just parts). I'm talking in the neighborhood of very round face, very round belly, looks younger than chronological age primarily through plumpness, moves rather awkwardly at times, furniture and car suspensions groan upon his arrival.

    2 - Smoking. Around a pack a day. The beginnings of a healthy (!?) smoker's cough. Clothing and skin seem saturated by the scent, save for just after a shower and fresh laundry.

    3 - Couture...or lack of a sense thereof. The same things - jeans, t-shirts, nondescript sneakers, nondescript hoodie in cold weather, partial to dark or black most of the time, some items occasionally ripped/stained/scuffed from work, but out of habit he clings to these items, as he sees rare if any occasion to dress up.

    4 - Introversion...to the point of perpetual social awkwardness. Long pauses while he thinks of things to say. Conversation is a draining chore. Reluctant to express a point of view, though when he does it can be fairly animated and, if he's geeky enough on the subject, rather like a pinball game, with subjects bouncing about, lack of complete thoughts, almost a babble.

    Of these, ladies (and I'll even crack the door open to male-preferring males, should there be an opinion on these matters,) which of the above four is the WORST trait, the wince-inducer, the deal-breaker, the leg-closer, the phone-number-loser, the ...well, you get the idea. I'll also accept orders of horrendousness from worst to not-as-bad-but-still-icky.

    Someone is looking for a starting point, and even after much cajoling and appeal, apparently only has willpower to focus on a single issue at a time *sigh.* Where should the focus lie? Where should he start?

    Thank you.

    ...And if this is the wrong forum after all, whoever has the power to do so has my full permission to move it to which ever category would suit it better. Thanks again.
     
  2. B_subgirrl

    B_subgirrl New Member

    Joined:
    May 15, 2010
    Messages:
    9,873
    Likes Received:
    11
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    NSW, Australia
    Personality is my determining factor every time.
     
  3. EternalCaverns

    EternalCaverns New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2008
    Messages:
    138
    Likes Received:
    10
    Gender:
    Female
    Personality first, of course. Second would be smoking, in terms of the list items.
     
  4. xX_Sarah_Xx

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 8, 2010
    Messages:
    478
    Albums:
    4
    Likes Received:
    127
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Belgium
    Verified:
    Photo
    Mine too.

    A hot guy with no personality and I'd lose interest within 3 minutes.
    Next comes the smoking and the size. I really don't know what's worse. All depends on how bad it is. If he's capable of not smoking when he's near me, I'd maybe be able to deal with that. I can deal with a guy that's not that "sporty". But not when he's obese I think. Actually, I'm not sure. I'm kind of sporty myself. Not sure if I could deal with that in the long run.
    I think living healthy is important, so those two would cross him off my list too.

    Clothes are influencable. If it's part of a personality trait though, then it's another thing that would cross him off the list.

    All in all, still rather depends on the person.
    Plus, I'm picky. :redface:
     
  5. MoneyForNothing

    Joined:
    Dec 8, 2010
    Messages:
    203
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Ontario
    I can't see this guy winning out over a dumb as nails stud, regardless of what is said.
     
  6. B_subgirrl

    B_subgirrl New Member

    Joined:
    May 15, 2010
    Messages:
    9,873
    Likes Received:
    11
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    NSW, Australia
    Actually, if I liked him as a person, his shape and size really wouldn't matter to me.
     
  7. EternalCaverns

    EternalCaverns New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2008
    Messages:
    138
    Likes Received:
    10
    Gender:
    Female
    Depends on what the objective is.

    If the woman is looking for just a fuck buddy or a casual fix, then of course the dumb stud will win, but if she's looking for something serious and committed and the obese guy is willing to get into shape and he already has a bomb personality, I think he will win in the long run. Women, on average, tend to be more flexible than men in this regard. Not AS cut and dry if some deals are made.

    If the deal can't be made to get into good shape and the woman is not into obese men to begin with, then I guess both men fail as far as serious relationships go.

    Because on the other hand, you certainly can't build a serious connection with someone as dumb as a box of rocks. It would then be all about sex as long as the guy performs, has an awesome dick to match that bangin' body, and keeps his mouth shut.
     
  8. DasLeezard

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2010
    Messages:
    557
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    16
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Washington State
    Verified:
    Photo
    Size- Doesn't really matter. I've married a big dude. I've dated a few big dudes. Hell, I've dated dudes of all sizes and fitness levels. As Yoda would say: "Give a fuck I do not."

    Smoking- I smoke. I've dated smokers and non-smokers.

    Clothing- As long as he wears clean clothes, I don't care. I have about as much fashion sense as the average guy, anyway

    Personality- I've dated the shy dudes, Extroverts, Assholes, Nice Guys, Criminally Insane, and everything in between. I dislike pricks. Not 'honest' guys, but absolute real evil pricks. Evil bastards and the overly egotistical guys turn me off.

    so yeah.. personality.
     
  9. D_Rosalind Mussell

    D_Rosalind Mussell New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 4, 2010
    Messages:
    1,376
    Likes Received:
    6
    I agree with all of this...except that I'm a non-smoker. Everything else is exactly the same for me.
     
  10. jennizeus

    jennizeus New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 20, 2007
    Messages:
    70
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    1
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    a house
    if you can't hold on a conversation with a guy or if he hasn't a good sense of humour....then its a total turn off
     
  11. D_Sue Ellen Brastretcher

    D_Sue Ellen Brastretcher Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2008
    Messages:
    1,201
    Likes Received:
    1
    I will admit I can't do this guy. Sorry. :redface: Not unless a large wad of cash was exchanged beforehand. :eek:
     
  12. D_JohnUpHerPipe

    D_JohnUpHerPipe New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 30, 2007
    Messages:
    158
    Likes Received:
    0
    I would say the smoking would be the most immediate turn off, if he stinks of it. Weight can sometimes be over looked if the personality is there and it can always be lost. Clothes are not too important as long as the nice clothes come out when necessary but there still has to be a personality there so i would say smoking would be my first turn off, i.e. having not got around to speaking yet so dont know about the lack of personality.
     
  13. MoneyForNothing

    Joined:
    Dec 8, 2010
    Messages:
    203
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Ontario
    Well, the question is on turn-offs. That is not the way it is being answered.
     
  14. LadyJaneGrey

    LadyJaneGrey New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2010
    Messages:
    23
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    The Tower
    Smoking.

    I like big men.

    I like introverts they are often the kinkiest lovers.

    I don't care about clothes as long as they're clean and he's comfortable and happy.

    That is just me.
     
  15. curious_angel

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 2010
    Messages:
    1,094
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    12
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    England
    Verified:
    Photo
    The worst trait for me is a lack of personality. Not being able to have a decent convo with a guy is a total no-go. This is very closely followed by size and clothing as described in the OP. I just don't find very overweight or badly dressed guys attractive. Smoking doesn't bother me.
     
  16. Patchos

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 23, 2006
    Messages:
    2,430
    Likes Received:
    16
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Australia
    Biggest turn off: small dick
     
  17. kc_showman

    kc_showman New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2006
    Messages:
    7
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    (OP here) This is interesting..after one day, seems Smoking is the big issue, with Social ineptitude a one-vote second, (body) Size a super-distant third and clothing not even making a dent. By all means, keep the info and the votes coming - I may have to reappraise my advice a bit for the next time I see him in a few days. The season's got him all kind of mopey and emo right now. Usually it blows over in a day or two, or at least he makes it back to a level of wanting to be around someone. I'm hoping if I can give him a nudge the right way he can run with it, but I wanted to give him the "best bang for the buck" info I could, based upon more than just my own view of the world. Thanks!
     
Draft saved Draft deleted