A red tie with gray stripes appropriate at a funeral?

Hoss

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My neighbor had a wife who died mysteriously Tuesday morning and there's to be a funeral Monday a.m. I have my suit ready and my funeral shirt (lovely shade of cornflower blue). They loved the color red same as I do, and I was wondering if it would be wrong to wear my red tie with gray stripes to the service (mostly red with narrow gray stripes running left down to the right).

Most times I have a simple black tie with gold fleur de lis for these things but she wasn't fond of gold so I'd feel strange with that tie.
 

Somebody2Love

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How bright is the red? If a subdued shade, yes. If a bright shade, no. But, your neighbor's wife liked red. Thank about what she would of liked and be the judge. :)

PS. My sympathies to the family.
 

yhtang

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I would not wear red at a funeral even though it is red with grey stripes.

You mentioned your neighbour's wife died mysteriously - perhaps under these circumstances red should be avoided in case on lookers think you have a part in the death!
 

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That sounds like it might be a little flashy for the occasion. Does he seem like the kinda guy to notice (though I am sure his attention will be else where). Or is this about other people that will be there?
He smokes a lot of funny stuff he probably wouldn't notice. I'm attending because of her mainly, she was very sweet and will be missed. I don't dress for other funeral attenders I dress with the dead person in mind.

I was raised that red was inappropriate for funerals or weddings. I would choose something else. My condolences.
Funeral Dress Etiquette
Thanks for that link nudeyorker and the advice and they condolence.

I would wear a black or brown tie.
My only black has gold design, she hated gold and I haven't got a brown tie. Wait, I have a beige tie, will that do?

i would have said just fine, but will bow to the others, something in the blue, black is probably more fitting

sorry for your loss
I don't have a bow tie:confused:. I have a few blue ties but they're probably inappropriate since 2 of them have red.

I may need to invest in a new tie.
 

Hoss

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How bright is the red? If a subdued shade, yes. If a bright shade, no. But, your neighbor's wife liked red. Thank about what she would of liked and be the judge. :)

PS. My sympathies to the family.
It's a beet red, dark deep. She liked red.

times have changed people
if she liked red then by all means wear it
I may stick with the red. I'm kind of confused now.

I would have to say darker also. I normaly wear black and grey to funerals, might as well fit the theme so to speak.
Well my suit is black and there's gray in the tie, I've never really been one to fit in.

The way I see it..if you are a guy that always wears brighter colors, and this lady knew this was who you were. The you must wear your red stripe tie...it's who you are and she would want that.
When away from work a splash of color has always been my trademark, it was hers as well. Wearing putrid dark green at work for years made me want a livlier color off work.

I would not wear red at a funeral even though it is red with grey stripes.

You mentioned your neighbour's wife died mysteriously - perhaps under these circumstances red should be avoided in case on lookers think you have a part in the death!
I hadn't thought about being linked to this.
I'd wear a black tie.
There seems to be a lot of push towards that and an almost equal number saying to wear the red.

I'm going to talk with her husband later and see how he's holding up, maybe get a feel of it all. I guess my tie purchases over the years haven't been as good as they should have been.


I remember my Granny had a friend that wore a bright red dress to a funeral once, it was upsetting to all except the bereaved person's family, they were happy about it that's why I want to talk with her husband and maybe their son, he drove in last night.
 

Charles Finn

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yes see how they feel and funeral are for the living not the dead
my grandmother had a phone in her casket her favorite color was pink we tried to get a pink phone but we had to settle for a white phone.
11 years later I still miss her
 

jjsjr

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Personally, I view a funeral as a celebration of a life rather than mourning. We mourn, the event celebrates.
But, keep in perspective the family and their concerns. Mine are slightly less somber.

Read my signature! :wink:

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FuzzyKen

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Everything is based on the people themselves. I just did the funeral thing for my late sister-in-law who left only a few weeks ago. In my case I tended to go more towards a monochrome look without any extreme contrasts. The funeral is for the living as the deceased have already left us. The ceremony is an honoring of the deceased and is supposed to be about they themselves and their life when they lived it. If you were to eliminate the blue shirt and go with a dark grey, a subdued red tie with grey stripes would be very much appropriate. I am assuming that you will be either in a grey or black suit. The red with the blue is a contrast which draws attention away from the deceased. Now, that is the decorum thing as it is "supposed to be". The truth is that if the deceased loved that particular tie and shirt combination and complemented you on it at some time in the past, you would be honoring her by in fact wearing that combination.
It would depend on circumstances. Good luck and sorry for the loss. . . .