I won't lie, this thread won't be objective but very personal. As much as I would like to say I'm not doing it for attention, and would like to believe I am not, the opposite is probably true.
Earlier this year all my bad habits over the past decade caught up with me with a ferocity. I wasn't in my 20s anymore and my body was tired of my shit. Probably a tired experience, I would imagine. A textbook example of the difference between knowledge and wisdom.
I was nearing 400lbs for the second time in my life and my BP has been well over 150/90 consistently for at least 3 months. Well, that's about when I had started tracking it at this point, anyway. I began to develop constant feelings of dread and anxiety, palpitations, the whole nine yards. That not being enough, I was dangerously close to alcoholism, to a point where a few people close to me expressed concern about just how much I drank despite numerous other friends drinking just as much if not more. It really sheds light on how it can creep up on you while you remain ignorant of the coming storm. If the people you surround yourself with do the same it very much seems perfectly normal and just good fun. To note, I was easily having 4-6 drinks every single day, on average, with maybe an average of one day a week without one. I would always joke to myself that I'm not an alcoholic until I must have a stiff one upon rising from bed.
The breaking point happened in late February of this year. I had a palpitation so bad that I lost my breath, lasting about 15 seconds or so. I thought for sure I had some sort of cardiac event. At this point I was easily 380lbs... and checking my BP that evening it was 170/120. Being the hypochondriac I am I was all over webmd for hours. I finally scheduled a visit with the doctor about it, focusing on my blood pressure. It took a few different prescriptions before I found one that didn't make me feel like death itself. The doctor was legitimately mad at me for waiting so long before addressing the BP issue.
I was soon referred to a cardiologist who did absolutely nothing to ease my heart health concerns. But in the end I would come to believe he is right, though I still have creeping doubts to this day. All he did was take my BP, listen to my heart, and prescribe me a beta blocker to both lower my BP further and at the same time help control my anxiety about it. I didn't last long on them, though, as if I sat sedentary for any longer than a few minutes I would feel like I would pass out. The reason was it would lower my HR below 50.
In the time between these doctors was about two weeks, and in that time I had started to dedicate myself to counting calories. Every single thing I put into my body, I did not miss it. I lost 20 pounds in those two weeks, it just melted off. I continued to drink, of course, and counted that as well. By that point, however, I had limited myself to 4-7 beers 2 days a week. It was still heavy, but I still really liked beer. Just for the taste, of course. And non-alcoholic conveniently just tasted bad.
Fast forward a couple months, I had gotten used to counting calories and strictly limiting salt in my diet. I was down to 330 and my BP was, for the most part, under control with a low dose of lisonopril. But it wasn't until I moved to Indiana, and away from my peers, that the drinking dropped off dramatically. And now that it has been a couple months of that, I look back and only now do I see just how close I was to needing a new liver at 45. I was dangerously teetering on the edge of needing a drink all hours of the day. As concerning as health concerns are, I am almost grateful my body warned me so viciously.
Lately I've been having a harder time with discipline on the salt and diet sodas and my BP has been on the higher end of optimal. I have to refocus every couple weeks to get it back down by going on a "salt fast." I have also been stuck fluctuating 270-280 for a month and a half, which is really why I typed all this out. Admitting to you all is a way to reinforce what I need to do and find motivation to work out every day and get back to cooking for myself again.
What I do to work out usually is play DDR until it hurts. I have a setup in the basement with a computer, TV, and foam pad to play something called stepmania. I also go on walks with my father sometimes, who I moved down here to be closer to.
I have a question, and seek advise. What do you do to keep motivated? Do you have a tactic when it falters? Also, how would you suggest I get started in lifting weights without immediately losing focus and interest? I own only two 15lb weights.
Thank you for reading
Earlier this year all my bad habits over the past decade caught up with me with a ferocity. I wasn't in my 20s anymore and my body was tired of my shit. Probably a tired experience, I would imagine. A textbook example of the difference between knowledge and wisdom.
I was nearing 400lbs for the second time in my life and my BP has been well over 150/90 consistently for at least 3 months. Well, that's about when I had started tracking it at this point, anyway. I began to develop constant feelings of dread and anxiety, palpitations, the whole nine yards. That not being enough, I was dangerously close to alcoholism, to a point where a few people close to me expressed concern about just how much I drank despite numerous other friends drinking just as much if not more. It really sheds light on how it can creep up on you while you remain ignorant of the coming storm. If the people you surround yourself with do the same it very much seems perfectly normal and just good fun. To note, I was easily having 4-6 drinks every single day, on average, with maybe an average of one day a week without one. I would always joke to myself that I'm not an alcoholic until I must have a stiff one upon rising from bed.
The breaking point happened in late February of this year. I had a palpitation so bad that I lost my breath, lasting about 15 seconds or so. I thought for sure I had some sort of cardiac event. At this point I was easily 380lbs... and checking my BP that evening it was 170/120. Being the hypochondriac I am I was all over webmd for hours. I finally scheduled a visit with the doctor about it, focusing on my blood pressure. It took a few different prescriptions before I found one that didn't make me feel like death itself. The doctor was legitimately mad at me for waiting so long before addressing the BP issue.
I was soon referred to a cardiologist who did absolutely nothing to ease my heart health concerns. But in the end I would come to believe he is right, though I still have creeping doubts to this day. All he did was take my BP, listen to my heart, and prescribe me a beta blocker to both lower my BP further and at the same time help control my anxiety about it. I didn't last long on them, though, as if I sat sedentary for any longer than a few minutes I would feel like I would pass out. The reason was it would lower my HR below 50.
In the time between these doctors was about two weeks, and in that time I had started to dedicate myself to counting calories. Every single thing I put into my body, I did not miss it. I lost 20 pounds in those two weeks, it just melted off. I continued to drink, of course, and counted that as well. By that point, however, I had limited myself to 4-7 beers 2 days a week. It was still heavy, but I still really liked beer. Just for the taste, of course. And non-alcoholic conveniently just tasted bad.
Fast forward a couple months, I had gotten used to counting calories and strictly limiting salt in my diet. I was down to 330 and my BP was, for the most part, under control with a low dose of lisonopril. But it wasn't until I moved to Indiana, and away from my peers, that the drinking dropped off dramatically. And now that it has been a couple months of that, I look back and only now do I see just how close I was to needing a new liver at 45. I was dangerously teetering on the edge of needing a drink all hours of the day. As concerning as health concerns are, I am almost grateful my body warned me so viciously.
Lately I've been having a harder time with discipline on the salt and diet sodas and my BP has been on the higher end of optimal. I have to refocus every couple weeks to get it back down by going on a "salt fast." I have also been stuck fluctuating 270-280 for a month and a half, which is really why I typed all this out. Admitting to you all is a way to reinforce what I need to do and find motivation to work out every day and get back to cooking for myself again.
What I do to work out usually is play DDR until it hurts. I have a setup in the basement with a computer, TV, and foam pad to play something called stepmania. I also go on walks with my father sometimes, who I moved down here to be closer to.
I have a question, and seek advise. What do you do to keep motivated? Do you have a tactic when it falters? Also, how would you suggest I get started in lifting weights without immediately losing focus and interest? I own only two 15lb weights.
Thank you for reading