A Special VIP Present for Hubby For X-mas- Question for Married Men

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by B_curiousme01, Nov 18, 2010.

  1. B_curiousme01

    B_curiousme01 New Member

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    Okay, so my hubby and I have been much more open about our sex life this past year. We have been together for a very longtime, are truly in love with each other, and have a great sex life. Our marriage is "Until Death Do us Part." Last Christmas we purchased our first toys and that has gone well.:smile::smile:

    Anyhoo, when we went to the toy store and I mentioned videos, he told me he only likes girls solo. He does not dig lap dances at strip clubs. He told me the other day "it would be much better to hire a a girl to do this in private than to have a chick grind on me in a club surrounded by other horny men while I have a hard on I can do nothing about."

    I found this really interesting not only because many men here seem to like both lap dances and porn in general, but because I only watch men solo, so we are sort of the same in this regard. He likes to watch me with the toys, so I know for sure this makes him feel very warm, fuzzy and happy.

    One of the experiences I would like to offer him is with a girl (not me) who will...."show and tell." I want our life to be full and to explore some things that may be considered taboo for most married couples. I don't think climaxing while looking at, or watching, another girl is a form of betrayal. To me, it's just a solo, fantasy climax and not anything like intercourse sex or a relationship with someone else.

    I am not jealous about this and really feel like it would be a very special GIFT! If I discussed this with him, he might say he didn't want it because he might think it's one of those "How do I best answer this question safely" uh-oh's I sometimes pull from out of the blue on him - not in a good way either.

    If your wife hired someone for you, would you freak, be weird, or enjoy it as the special experience intended? Aftershock potential?

    How do I find someone? It cannot be someone we know. Would I get to see what she looked like first - sort of pick her out for him? Where should they do this? Not sure I want it in the house, but maybe that would be the most comfortable for him? How much would it cost? Is there a time limit when hiring a girl? Do you think it could turn out badly? Am I insane to do this?

    He does not have to talk to me about it. I simply want to give him something I think he might really like that he would never have an opportunity to experience just because we are married. And this is totally safe - no disease or guilty feelings about having sex with someone else.

    And, no. Before everyone reads too much into this, I do not expect him to reciprocate. It's not about that.

    Honest thoughts please. Thank you!
     
  2. vlls

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    if my gf did this to me I would just say thank you and enjoy the show... it would totally be hot if she was jerking me off while I was watching the other girl... and in my case id be willing to do the same for her. bear in mind though that me and my gf have a very sexually honest relationship and we're not into jealousy... prob like u guys

    i think theres strippers u can get that can come to ur house for a private show... ive seen stuff like that in some local newspapers/periodicals etc.

    Good luck and be sure to tell us how it turns out!
     
  3. D_Etienne Neerdowell

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    A tricky one. You really need to raise the topic with him and allay any fears that he may have about breaking the boundaries of your relationship. You need to ensure that he's comfortable that your comfortable with it! Only then would you get an honest response from him - it may ultimately be a fantasy that he wants to remain unfulfilled, we always need to keep some thoughts for ourselves.

    When the private dance is taking place where will you be. Is this going to be solely at his discretion?
     
  4. B_crackoff

    B_crackoff New Member

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    I will tell you this - he will be very confused at first!

    If you want to play with him or allow him to beat himself off, sorry it'll have to be an escort/pro. Being in the comfort of your own home is more likely to release any nerves he will definitely have - I can assure you from experience the main thing going through his mind will not be her, it will be how much he is pissing you off!!!!! (unless he's an ass - which he can't be)

    A bizarre compromise would be luring him to a strip club, getting a private booth, & having the girl give YOU a lap dance, then him.

    Actually that would work at home too!

    You'll not only need to know the boundaries, but communicate them to the girl, & most importantly to him - & reassure him. Taking some photos or film of it, will probably give you both a lasting memory.

    If you don't want any sexual contact to or from her, explain it straight away - but these things can go a little wild!

    You could just get her to give him a naked massage, film it, saygoodbye to her, then finish it off yourself. If he feels timid, get him to film her giving you a massage, or dancing naked with you. Maybe she could have a whip!

    Gosh, you must love him a lot!

    The main danger is YOU YOU YOU! Honestly, even when it's a woman's idea they often get weird afterwards, mainly because in their mind their guy fancies the other woman too much, treats her better etc.

    Generally, the guy is being ultra polite.

    Maybe you could tie him up, handcuff him first, some music pumping, & then she could get naked on the bed, writhing, dancing, & massaging, all of you oiled up, but the only one pulling him off would be you. If he'd helpless, then you'll still have control, & that means you won't get pissed off, & will revel in your selfless domination.

    That sounds good to me!
     
    #4 B_crackoff, Nov 18, 2010
    Last edited: Nov 18, 2010
  5. B_curiousme01

    B_curiousme01 New Member

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    Thanks so much for the reply and ideas! We are not overly jealous and most of it happened in the beginning of our relationship.
     
  6. B_curiousme01

    B_curiousme01 New Member

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    Execellent ideas and I see that you understand the female mind well :)
    First bold: :-(
    Second bold: Brillant
    Third bold: I know this is strange, but honestly, I would not be upset or even think he liked her better. I would just think it was a new type of sexual experience. The chance of him falling in love with her is not even a concern. I think that's why I could be so cool with it.

    Great reply!!!!
     
  7. B_curiousme01

    B_curiousme01 New Member

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    So I told him last night and after about a two minute period of every emotion crossing his face he said "WHAT? Why?" I know at first (after the shock and some confusion too) he was thinking "I know there's TROUBLE somewhere in this for me." We talked about it quite a bit and he's just not interested in being with another.

    He did say that he would feel awkward and that it is not possible to offer any guy a naked girl and then tell him no sex. :) That's not exactly what I meant. I just thought it would be a good midway point. He could if he wore a condom... but he said no.

    He was very sweet about it and told me what he would like instead...so that's what he will get, along with a Fleshlight.

    Thanks for all the ideas, advice and comments. All make sense and I am glad I did post this and ask him first.
     
  8. B_curiousme01

    B_curiousme01 New Member

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    Perfect response and we did discuss it. No go.
     
  9. vlls

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    What does he want instead? :eek:)

    You're awesome to tell him do this if he wore a condom!
     
  10. D_Etienne Neerdowell

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    Cool - glad to have offered some assistance. Hope things work out at Christmas.
     
  11. B_curiousme01

    B_curiousme01 New Member

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    I must be the minority. Not one female has replied to this post either in the positive or negative. Truthfully, as a general rule, we do NOT LIKE to share and I have not always felt like I could offer this experience to someone I loved. Prior to this point in our lives, the thought of him with another was enough to literally make me sick to my stomach.

    I think I could do it because I do love him and know for sure that there is no possibility of him falling "in love" with the other girl, or her feeling better than I do to him.

    He wants a pin-up pic of me. I think I'm going to make him a scrapbook type of thing with some background things in the images that have meaning...his first gift to me, jewelery he has given me in lingerie, that type of thing. Plus, of course, the Fleshlight for when he is lonely or feeling frisky and I am away.:biggrin1:
     
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