Hey Everyone,
I've lurked on this site for probably 7 years or so since I first heard of LPSG.
Being a guy who spends plenty of time on his computer I have to say that I came to LPSG trying to get a better sense of how I rate on the "penis size scale" but I got hooked on the "fictitious stories section" and now Ive come to realize something far more important about LPSG.
In the last 7 years Ive found LPSG members to be some of the most open minded, thoughtful and creative people on the internet. I dont know if it's the inherent "extreme nature" of the site or maybe it's just the type of people that this sort of topic attracts ... but I am writing this post because I have the upmost respect for the members of this forum and feel that the responses will be thoughtful, genuine and honest.
That being said, I would like you all to help me diagnose a problem.
I turned 29 this month and for the first time ever Im getting a strong sense that I need to find a woman and get married. I feel a vague sort of social or maybe biological pressure telling me that I need to find a wife quickly. I'm also feeling a mild sense of loneliness and the desire to share my daily experiences with someone who is closer to me than any friend or family member.
It's strange because Ive never bothered much with girls or girlfriends in the past and now suddenly it seems like finding a woman is of the upmost importance!
While surfing around the internet today I read something disturbing online ... "If you're 30 years old, if you're not constantly looking at womens breasts and if you dont have a girlfriend or wife ... then you must be gay."
Let me just establish that I am NOT gay.
That being said, this comment angered me, confused me and got me thinking at the same time. Im often asked if Im gay ... or people automatically assume that Im gay ... and now Im worrying that maybe something that Im doing or part of who I am is projecting the wrong sort of image and/or attracting the wrong type of people ... or possibly even impressing/intimidating the right kind of women to where they're anxious to approach me?
From searching around the internet Ive gathered that part of my problem may be that Im too secure, confident, emotionally available, kind, considerate, open-minded, respectful, artistic, passionate, romantic, intelligent, optimistic, ambitious, healthy, helpful, talkative and generally too friendly to be a straight guy or possibly that Im too good to be true.
Beyond just being presumed gay these attributes tend to label me as nerdy, dorky or geeky as well.
Another strange thing that I notice about myself (or at least Im classifying it as strange based off of the behavior of others) is that Im not constantly chasing tail and the opportunity to have sex is not the primary motivating force behind my desire to associate with women ... I mean sex is part of it ... but it's not the ONLY part.
I just want a beautiful woman who I love so intensely that when I look at her my eyes have to adjust themselves to take in all her beauty and my heart feels like it's going to rip out of my chest. I want to learn every curve of her body, make passionate love to her, hold her close at night and feel our hearts beating together. I want us to understand each other, trust each other and be able to rely on one another. I want to share our lives and our experiences and most of all, I want to know that when I look at her with all that love and passion, shes looking back at me the same way.
The hardest part about the whole being presumed gay thing is that if I were to explain the feelings in the above paragraph to anyone but my one closest friend I would likely be insulted, ridiculed and called gay.
Reading through other forums online I found a few responses to similar questions saying how those who are insecure will look at those who are secure with a sense of envy and malcontent. This feels very true for the why do people think Im gay question (as well as some other forms of animosity I get from time to time) but it doesnt really help me with the why cant I find a girl question.
Seems to me like everywhere I go to socialize its littered with girls that are too young, too old, too desperate, too loose, to ditzy or simply too far away from what Im looking for.
Unfortunately, most of the women Im attracted to dont frequent social hot spots because theyre too busy having an actual life, have independent personalities and dont follow the herd which makes them hard to associate with because theres no one place you can go to find these women in abundance.
Now that Ive gotten this far into my post Im starting to realize that there really may be no solid answer to my concerns but Im still interested in hearing the thoughts of the LPSG members.
I've lurked on this site for probably 7 years or so since I first heard of LPSG.
Being a guy who spends plenty of time on his computer I have to say that I came to LPSG trying to get a better sense of how I rate on the "penis size scale" but I got hooked on the "fictitious stories section" and now Ive come to realize something far more important about LPSG.
In the last 7 years Ive found LPSG members to be some of the most open minded, thoughtful and creative people on the internet. I dont know if it's the inherent "extreme nature" of the site or maybe it's just the type of people that this sort of topic attracts ... but I am writing this post because I have the upmost respect for the members of this forum and feel that the responses will be thoughtful, genuine and honest.
That being said, I would like you all to help me diagnose a problem.
I turned 29 this month and for the first time ever Im getting a strong sense that I need to find a woman and get married. I feel a vague sort of social or maybe biological pressure telling me that I need to find a wife quickly. I'm also feeling a mild sense of loneliness and the desire to share my daily experiences with someone who is closer to me than any friend or family member.
It's strange because Ive never bothered much with girls or girlfriends in the past and now suddenly it seems like finding a woman is of the upmost importance!
While surfing around the internet today I read something disturbing online ... "If you're 30 years old, if you're not constantly looking at womens breasts and if you dont have a girlfriend or wife ... then you must be gay."
Let me just establish that I am NOT gay.
That being said, this comment angered me, confused me and got me thinking at the same time. Im often asked if Im gay ... or people automatically assume that Im gay ... and now Im worrying that maybe something that Im doing or part of who I am is projecting the wrong sort of image and/or attracting the wrong type of people ... or possibly even impressing/intimidating the right kind of women to where they're anxious to approach me?
From searching around the internet Ive gathered that part of my problem may be that Im too secure, confident, emotionally available, kind, considerate, open-minded, respectful, artistic, passionate, romantic, intelligent, optimistic, ambitious, healthy, helpful, talkative and generally too friendly to be a straight guy or possibly that Im too good to be true.
Beyond just being presumed gay these attributes tend to label me as nerdy, dorky or geeky as well.
Another strange thing that I notice about myself (or at least Im classifying it as strange based off of the behavior of others) is that Im not constantly chasing tail and the opportunity to have sex is not the primary motivating force behind my desire to associate with women ... I mean sex is part of it ... but it's not the ONLY part.
I just want a beautiful woman who I love so intensely that when I look at her my eyes have to adjust themselves to take in all her beauty and my heart feels like it's going to rip out of my chest. I want to learn every curve of her body, make passionate love to her, hold her close at night and feel our hearts beating together. I want us to understand each other, trust each other and be able to rely on one another. I want to share our lives and our experiences and most of all, I want to know that when I look at her with all that love and passion, shes looking back at me the same way.
The hardest part about the whole being presumed gay thing is that if I were to explain the feelings in the above paragraph to anyone but my one closest friend I would likely be insulted, ridiculed and called gay.
Reading through other forums online I found a few responses to similar questions saying how those who are insecure will look at those who are secure with a sense of envy and malcontent. This feels very true for the why do people think Im gay question (as well as some other forms of animosity I get from time to time) but it doesnt really help me with the why cant I find a girl question.
Seems to me like everywhere I go to socialize its littered with girls that are too young, too old, too desperate, too loose, to ditzy or simply too far away from what Im looking for.
Unfortunately, most of the women Im attracted to dont frequent social hot spots because theyre too busy having an actual life, have independent personalities and dont follow the herd which makes them hard to associate with because theres no one place you can go to find these women in abundance.
Now that Ive gotten this far into my post Im starting to realize that there really may be no solid answer to my concerns but Im still interested in hearing the thoughts of the LPSG members.