A swinging couple

Tominet

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Hi everyone,

I would like to ask for your opinion regarding my situation with my gf. We are a engaged couple, she's 25, I'm 32 and we have been swinging regularly with another couple for the last 2 months. The thing is that I'm not large, way below average with a girth of 4-4.5", and not being able to engage in much more positions than the missionary position due to the lack of lenght, so that's mainly the reason for us to explore the swinging life style.

The guy, with whom my gf is meeting, is really large. After measuring him, I can say that he is good for 7" in girth and 9.5" in lenght, with a strong and long lasting erection as well. Besides the size he have this PA piercing, quite a large one, that seems to give her some extra stimulation during sex as well, she tells me she feel it during sex and it hits the "right spots".

Now, as we have been meeting with this other couple quite often, about 2-3 times a week and my gf is getting even more accommodated with the large size of him, I'm wondering about any long term effect it might have on her. She couldn't take him, without too much discomfort the first few weeks, as the size between me and him are simply too big. Today she is totally relaxed with the size of him, and doesn't feel the slightest bit of pain during sex with him.

I'm aware that as time goes by and she have more sex with this other guy, it will make me feel even smaller, after getting accommodated with the large size of him.

Well folks, let me know your thoughts...

/Tom
 

Rubenesque

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Is the issue really a physical one or an emotional one?

I suppose the thing is, if it continues then clearly she will be used to a large penis and a smaller one won't feel the same. But, if she were to stop sleeping with him, then she would soon shrink back down.
 

Tominet

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Is the issue really a physical one or an emotional one?

I suppose the thing is, if it continues then clearly she will be used to a large penis and a smaller one won't feel the same. But, if she were to stop sleeping with him, then she would soon shrink back down.

I think it's probably a little bit of both actually. After having some serious discussions about this, me and my gf, she told me that the biggest different is that she's now got used to being totally relaxed during sex with him, and can therefore focus on just feeling him, something she hasn't been able to do with me both before engaging in this life style and especially now after being with someone that larger than me. Anyway, I'm fine with it actually, I mean there should be a reason to be a swinger in the first place, and I guess this is how it's gonna be in the future as well.

She have always thought she is one of those girls just being able to orgasm from oral sex, until this experience as she get off quite easily with him during sex, and I think we all agree that the size of him does indeed play a crucial part of that.

No, I don't think she would be permanent enlarged, but in some extend I think she would get used to the girth of him making it much more difficult for her to enjoy, even an average size.

What effect might the PA piercing have on her during sex? She tells me that sex, especially from lying on the side having him from behind feels much more intense due to the piercing. Since it's quite large, I guess it really makes a different?!

Thanks all for your thoughts, I really appreciate it!!

/Tom
 

Rubenesque

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If you're ok with it then there isn't really a problem I suppose. Although long term I'd worry that it would be emotionally damaging to know that both the girls you're having sex with are used to larger penises.

With regard to the PA, I've only slept with one guy who has one, and at the time it was a relatively small piercing. The only time I really felt it was when he initially entered me, or when he very nearly pulled out. Can't say it did much to improve the sex, just briefly caused an "interesting" sensation.

EDIT - just realised I've slept with 2 guys who have PA's - naughty me!
 

Tominet

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If you're ok with it then there isn't really a problem I suppose. Although long term I'd worry that it would be emotionally damaging to know that both the girls you're having sex with are used to larger penises.

With regard to the PA, I've only slept with one guy who has one, and at the time it was a relatively small piercing. The only time I really felt it was when he initially entered me, or when he very nearly pulled out. Can't say it did much to improve the sex, just briefly caused an "interesting" sensation.

EDIT - just realized I've slept with 2 guys who have PA's - naughty me!

Yes, I'm very aware that both are used to a much larger one, especially my gf. The other couple have been together for 7 years so the other girl is very used to it by now.

It feels actually a little "emotional", but in a good way seeing my gf with the other large guy, in an "interesting" way, sort of. I've always got pleasure from seeing my gf her enjoy sex and that's what she's doing with him for sure. As we are together I can tell by the look and sound that she's liking it more and more all the time. When could you call a woman a "size queen" as I've come across that term after reading around in this forum. As she have her orgasm(s) quite easily with the large guy, and never got any (during intercourse) with anyone else in fact, does that make her such a "queen"? Many new terms for me, but I'm "learning"! :)

Honestly, how much different do you actually think it feels, physically speaking i mean, sex with me and the other guy?? I guess it must feel quite different, thinking he have about 3" more girth and 4" more length than I do, which after a quick math, would mean he's being able to fill her almost 5 times more than me. When putting it like that, I guess it's quite obvious that she could easily be "spoiled" and gotten almost "too used" to something big as that, but after seeing how much she enjoy it, I would never take it away from her, just too much pleasure would go wasted then.

I also think she have gone through many "emotional" things herself the past two months, as she discovered that she's indeed very capable of climaxing from intercourse alone, with this other guy.

Thanks again.. over and out for now...

/Tom
 

B_willy5904

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With swinging with another couple you and your gf have a great opportunity to learn from the other couple. Your gf is not orgasming during intercourse with him because he has a big dick. It is because he knows how to swing that big bat. How is sex with the other women? Explore different combinations, talk among the 4 of partners, and learn from each other. Remember your biggest sex organ is your brain, keep it engaged.

My wife and I have been having group sex for 20 years, primarily with the same small group of couples. What has made it an enjoyable and successful lifestyle is the open communication between all the members of our group. We discuss everything from technique to emotions. Our only rule is to pleasure and respect the partner you are with at the moment.
 

tg1000

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Tom

so you mentioned your girl can orgasm with him now from intercourse. How is sex btw u and your gf now after u have been with other couple? better? worse?

i think that is an important quesiton. is this experience making sex better btw both of you?
 

lickme69

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Heres my question. Are you secretly afraid that she will not have good sex with you after having this larger man? It seems she may be enjoying herself way too much.
I have seen scenarios like this and the woman tends to leave for the larger cock.
 

Tominet

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Hi,

Firstly, this haven't ever been my "fantasy" of seeing my gf with a large guy, he just happen to be very large. Nor would I think of it as a "Cuckold Fantasy" that Mr. Alpha Male put it since the four of us are equally involved, in different ways though. SPH, don't make me laugh!! :) Not a single time during our sessions have anyone given me the hint that, hey, you're very small btw, so the end of that theory too.

Overall, we are all engaged equally, sexually. I have gotten more sex the past 2 months than usually, so I'm not really complaining. Like Willy5904 said, that the brain is your biggest sex organ is true indeed, and we are all learning from this experience. My part of the session is mostly oral, getting and recieving, while the other guy taking care of the intercourse part.

Lickme69, I'm I secretly afraid that she will not have good sex with you after having this larger man? Hmm, probably in the beginning I was, but I can please my gf in other ways than intercouse, so I'm not worrying as much anymore. I've tried intercourse with my gf a couple of times right after she's been with the other guy, but as you might think, it didn't just give either of us any stimulation, it almost felt like having a spoon in the coffee cup, so why go on "humiliating" yourself with that?

Well, time to do some work...bye for now!

/Tom
 

SR_Pepe_LePube

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With swinging with another couple you and your gf have a great opportunity to learn from the other couple. Your gf is not orgasming during intercourse with him because he has a big dick. It is because he knows how to swing that big bat. How is sex with the other women? Explore different combinations, talk among the 4 of partners, and learn from each other. Remember your biggest sex organ is your brain, keep it engaged.

My wife and I have been having group sex for 20 years, primarily with the same small group of couples. What has made it an enjoyable and successful lifestyle is the open communication between all the members of our group. We discuss everything from technique to emotions. Our only rule is to pleasure and respect the partner you are with at the moment.

I couldn't add anything further; this is spot on.
 

jdoe86

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She will leave you for the other guy even though he is with someone... If you don't feel you "measure up", then you might as well just let her have her fun and sit at home and pout.
First rule of swinging: Don't engage in the lifestyle unless you are very secure with your relationship.
 

Tominet

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Well, all your comments just made me wondering about this swinging lifestyle of ours, but I think as long as we are being honest and open about it all, we should be fine.

No, I cannot "measure up" with this other guy, as he is that much larger in every way. We didn't seek for such a large guy, he just happen to be that large. It wasn't like my gf got "excited" when she first saw it, in fact she had much hesitation in even trying to have sex with him in the first place, and the first times just caused too much pain for her to enjoy it. We were even close of calling the whole Swinging off because of the large size of him, they just seemed to be incompatible. Is she now enjoing him "too much", well hard to tell, she do get strong and intense orgasms, while having intercourse with him, that's for sure, but is she enjoing it "too much"??

I'm not seeking for a "humiliation relationship", nor would I want that kind of "attention" either, the only time so far I've felt the slightest bit of humiliation was when I tried to have intercourse with my gf, right after the other guy had been with her for quite some time, and while she was really wet.

/Tom
 

B_grababig1

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AS a single guy my experience in the LIfestyle has been s/w different than the couple situations. I have gone to a club in a country setting with a pool, small hotel, and nightclub for the evening. There is some discrimination in that singles pay more and the number of singles is limited per event. There is some advantage in that I am readily available with out any complication of a partner. I am often chosen to please a wife with the husband watching. Someitimes both wife and husband want to be satisfied. Clearly I have seen all sizes of cocks and breasts. Size does matter, as I recall a time there was a young very well endowed guy very much favored by the women there. He was very busy most of the night. There are some areas of the club only for couples - oh well. Generally the women seemed much more willing to be quite naked but the guys were often more reserved. Why? There were fortunately at least some exhibitionists to liven things a lot. The gals seemed to prefer me in boxers but sometimes naked and sometimes a jock. I especially appreciate when some members really want you to learn and to be skillful sexually. Ulktimately it isn't enough to be very hung, exchanging pleasure counts. Sometimes I don't know the best way to approach and show interest without being too pushy. Often times, my bulge garners interest. I really totally enjoy the sharing and the letting go that has to be there. I guess I have been lucky too. Some couples have really taken me into their separate space. well, eough for now......grababig1@aol.comm