A Year of Waiting to Get Cut

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by NOINRI, Aug 26, 2011.

  1. NOINRI

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    I've been going to this Barbershop for a year now. It has a bunch of Barbers.

    There's this one Barber I've had a crush on since the beginning. For some odd reason it never would work out that he would cut my hair. I didn't know if he only cut certain people's and was one of the "special" barbers but whenever I would walk in and his chair was empty, some other Barber would make a move for me and he never did. Or else I would walk in and he was cutting somebody's hair and somebody snatched me up before he had finished.

    Anyway, 2 days ago he finally got me. I walked in and only one barber was there. The old veteran father type of the shop. He talks a lot and takes forever to cut one head. So I'm waiting and my crush Barber walks in. I'm the only person waiting to get my hair cut and I start to get anticipatory and nervous.

    He walks in the back, puts his stuff away and comes back out, looks at me and asks if he could help me. I nod and hop right on in his chair.

    He immediately says, "Let me see your eyes," and grabs my head with his hands and tilts my head back. *OrgasmForLife*

    We are looking directly into each other's eyes and he nods and smiles as in approval of my eyes and I smile back. He then opens up by asking why I prefer the style of cut that I had asked for and why I like it and the such. Just general conversation. I found this uncharacterisitic of him. In all my time there, I've never seen him strike up a conversation with a customer or even his employees. He's the quiet type.

    I'm the quiet type too and I didn't participate in the conversation and keep it going as I should have and wish I had. I gave short terse responses. Nervous, shy and anxious. I always do this in similar situations and mess myself up for whatever may result.

    So at the end I'm counting my money to pay him and I look up at him to give it to him and I see he had been standing there looking at me the whole time in close range, he had walked around the chair, smiling this big grin at me and looking directly into my eyes.

    Sooooo..........could there be anything to this or did I slip his mind the moment his next paying customer walk through the door?

    My hair better grow quick. I want to see him again. I'll be disappointed though if he isn't even there. Regardless, who knows the next time I'll even get to interact with him given the fact that it took a year for him to finally get me by chance. May be another year before I get him again. Guess I'll just have to stare at him all stalkery from across the room as some other barber has his grubby hands all over my head.

    (The veteran father barber WAS STILL on the same guy's head he started before I even got in the chair to get mine cut.)

    ( .-.)
     
  2. dolfette

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    silly man!
    next time ask for him by name!! say you liked what he did with your hair so much that you want him to do it again. you'll wait until he's free. people do that all the time. it wouldn't come across as too weird and it would be a subtle encouragement for him.
     
  3. SomeGuyOverThere

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    This.

    Also - get in there! If he asks if you want anything else, ask for his number!
     
  4. Stephenmass

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    First off, when he looked you straight in the eyes he caught you off guard right away and who wouldn't have been caught off guard like that. He was a guy you had been crushing on for a long time and now he's looking at you right in the eyes!! I've NEVER had any barber look me straight in the eyes except very briefly in conversation or something but the look you speak of I think meant more. In any event, it left you speechless, in your own words "instant orgasm".

    There is nothing wrong as the others have said to request him when getting your hair cut. The shop I go to has 3 sometimes 4 barbers cutting all at once and if he is working I "pass" if another barber's chair opens and simply say "I'm waiting for Rich". I have no romantic interest in him at all, etc. He's simply a barber that has been cutting my hair for 3 years and I love the way he cuts it; it's not an unusual request to even ask for his "card" if he has one.

    Go every 2-3 weeks and get to know him. Prepare yourself for him to try to get you to have another "orgasm" in the chair (which is easy for him to do because I think he knows you like him). Try not to let him manipulate and have the control because I think he already knows he does. Carry on a conversation with him as if you are friends...friends sometimes go out for coffee or a beer or something like that, etc. But take the time it takes to get to know him. After getting your hair cut for a bit by him you will become more comfortable.

    Another thing that a lot of barbers will do is use their customer "crushes" to their advantage to gain a bigger tip. It's up to you to sort out whether this is the case or not by simply allowing yourself to be friendly and getting to know him.
     
  5. NOINRI

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    Thanks for the tips guys.

    I actually don't know his name and that's been bothering me. The next time he cuts my hair I'll ask him his name at the end to say thank you for the cut. I think that's appropriate.

    I'll definitely focus on engaging him in conversation as well to make it easier to speak to him period, and when I go to ask his name, it'll be more natural a progression, considering I've never asked any of the other barbers their names.

    Also, the statement about taking advantage of any tip I may give him was interesting. Never occurred to me. I think I'd actually like to give him a nice tip to hopefully convey my feelings in a way I can't with words at this point.

    I just hope word doesn't get around because I never do the other barbers like that, and that could get weird and give me away.

    I also hope I didn't turn him off with our first encounter. I've been mulling over the experience in my head repeatedly nonstop, reacting it in the mirror, kicking myself for not giving back to the conversation. He may take that as me not being interested. That's if he's even really interested at all. He was still smiling at the end though so that's reassuirng.

    I'd like to think so though and your posts were very encouraging. For all I know, he has a girlfriend and some kids. Lulz.
     
  6. NOINRI

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    So I've been pondering as to whether I should return on a Weekday or a Weekend.

    Odds are he'll be there on a Weekend. It'll be more crowded though and how likely is he to make a move or are we to progress with a crowd of plausibly homophobic male onlookers. Not much. He may not even feel comfortable enough to speak to me personally.

    Although chances are lessened that he'll be there on a Weekday where it's very slow. I tend to go on Weekdays for this reason. Our first interaction did occur on a Weekday though.

    And of course because it's so slow on Weekdays, chairs will be empty, my regular barber will probably be there beckoning me as soon as I walk through the door and I still feel so awkward and rude about all of a sudden telling him no, turning him away, turning to my crush and telling him I want him.

    Tension. Barbershop Tension. What if the other barber holds a grudge and then I walk in one day and he's the only one there?

    I can only hope for another scenario like the one I experienced the last time.
     
  7. NOINRI

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    It's about time for another trim up. I was contemplating going today and succumbed to my nervousness and put it off for 2 more days.

    Irrational Mind: If you go back, you'll be obvious. You can stand to wait a few more days. You look alright.

    Rational Mind: This is the amount of time that normally passes between your visits. Don't you walk around with your head jacked up.
     
  8. ConanTheBarber

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    Has it been nine days since you were last cropped?
    Do you go that often?
    I'd wait a bit.
    But what do I know?
    ;-)
     
  9. NOINRI

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    I believe I went last Wednesday so Sunday would be 11 days since my last visit. I never really paid attention or scrutinized how often I went until now.

    Are you a Barber?
     
  10. mandoman

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    I smell romance in the air. Guys who are not interested, do not engage in the kind of eye contact he engaged in. They are usually thinking about something else. He's interested.
    There is almost nothing you could do, to screw this up. He wants you, and you want him, you just want him to be discreet about it. Go before lunch, and ask him where a good place to get a sandwich is. Maybe he'll show you. Just let it happen naturally.
    Good luck, man. It sounds promising.
     
  11. ConanTheBarber

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    If yah wanna get cut, I'm yah man.
    I don't wanna be a partay pooper, but in such cases, we never know how accurately the one we know is smitten, is seeing things.
    And NOINRI is smitten.
    That said, he could be dead spot on in his reading.
    We just don't know.
     
    #11 ConanTheBarber, Sep 3, 2011
    Last edited: Sep 3, 2011
  12. B_gtmusic

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    yup, if so, we'll never know that.
     
  13. NOINRI

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    Thanks. I really hope you're right. In my experience, guys tend to be too macho to ever openly notice another guy's eyes, furthermore compliment them. He stood out in that regard and the fact that he felt at ease enough to physically tilt my head back. I would think most guys would be hesitant in taking such liberties. Most would be afraid of being labeled as homosexual or being met with hostility or physical conflict. He felt comfortable enough with himself and with me to do this though.

    I've been in situations where if my eyes are brought up, guys will go out of their way to disregard them in fear that anything less would be a sign of depleting masculinity/heteromachoness. And in a Barbershop, where there tends to be an overabundance of testosterone and chest pounding and who has the bigger twang contests, I just found my experience very out of character and hopefully significant.


    I think you just did cut me deep right there. Partay Poopa. :p

    That's why I came seeking other points of view on the matter. To make sure I wasn't seeing something that wasn't there. I hope my words were able to convey exactly what happened as closely and as honestly as possible.

    Though yes........I imagine I am smitten............just a teeny weeny itsy bitsy bit. Possibly. Maybe. ; )
     
  14. ConanTheBarber

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    Solly.

    I hope so too, but I can't know.

    Aha!
    Well, keep us in the loop, NOINRI.
     
  15. mandoman

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    yeah. inquiring minds want to know how it works out.
    best of luck, noinri.
     
  16. NOINRI

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    Thanks peeps. Will do. Or else I'll shuffle away in shame, defeat and disappointment.
     
  17. stnbl

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    Some products actually help the grow....just sayyin.
     
  18. NOINRI

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    So I just got back from my haircut.

    He was there. But it was slow. I was in a rush to get to work and this other Barber aggressively motioned for me. I went.......defeated.

    Umm.......at the end as I walked past him towards to door, he quickly looked up from the head he was cutting up at me and I looked straight ahead. I was nervous.

    When I first walked in and sat down, I was sweating waterfalls.

    I don't know. I've never made a go for ANYONE before and knowing me, my nerves will always get in the way of letting anything happen if anything could happen.

    I at least wish I had looked back at him and smiled. I wished this as soon as I had walked by him.

    This is a pattern I'm finding myself in a lot lately and eventually I just give up and accept it.

    Although I know it's unfair for me to expect all of the effort to come from the other party, I always seem incapable of even subtly making my interest known or allowing them to even see the opening.

    If I liked someone and they just walked by me without even so much as a glance, acknowledgement or a brief greeting or farewell, I know how I'd take that. I felt so rude.

    I'm too scared to take the risk.
     
  19. NOINRI

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    So if you will just check my most recent Photo Album Picture, you'll see that I had been growing my hair for a while and had been away from the Barber Shop.

    Well I just got a new job and had to cut my hair, ergo a visit to the Barber Shop. I hadn't seen my guy in a while and was nervous and anxious.

    I pull up into the parking lot and park. I'm looking down fiddling with something before I get out of the car and I hear a knock knock knock on the hood of my car and I look up and it's him.

    He's smiling ear to ear at me and waving. Perhaps he missed me too? I don't know, but it made me feel good.

    So I smile and wave back and finally get out the car where he and another Barber were waiting for me at the entrance. They immediately start asking me questions concerning my absence, open the door for me and walk me in and immediately the OTHER Barber starts telling me to come to his seat. My guy tells me not to pay him any attention and that he's acting stupid and to sit in his seat instead, and so I happily oblige.

    And so the rest of the visit just consisted of him asking me about my time away, where I had been and what I had been doing with my hair.

    That's it.

    At the end he thanked me, I thanked him and we hugged per the usual and I was off.

    I did tell them I'd go get my cell phone afterwards and bring it in from the car and show them pictures of my hairstyle since they seemed so interested, but when my haircut was over and I went out to my car, I lost my nerve, hopped in, shut the door and drove off.

    I'll show him next time.
     
  20. redneckgymrat

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    My favorite barbers keep track of their more interesting clients. I wear an extremely severe Marine-style flattop, which places me in the "interesting" category. My very favorite can tell me the exact day/time I was last there, and which variation he cut, even after an extended absence...sometimes it's a long time, since I genuinely enjoy barber bouncing.

    Of course, my flattop is freshened up at least weekly, often twice weekly, so I get a lot of chances to barber bounce, and if the untried barber messes it up, I can re-cut it myself. Y'know, while I'm out of town for business tomorrow, I'll probably scope out a few shops. Yeah, might be fun!

    So, is it just the barber himself that you like, or do you have a haircut fetish, too?
     
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