ABC News Sex Survey - Average number of Sexual Partners (for a lifetime)

[houtx48]

The numbers seem low.

 

[travis1985]

We took an "anonymous" survey in high school that included questions about sexual experience. It seemed obvious to me then that a lot of the guys probably inflated their number to feel like studs and that a lot of the girls reduced theirs to not feel like sluts.

 

[Gecko4lif]

Swap the 2 figures and it would be more beliveable imo

 

[bobg4400]

Exactly. It's amazing how poor at math the general public is if the majority thinks these numbers make sense. In hetero relationships, the average number of partners per woman must equal the average number of partners per man.

Take a simplified case where you have 10 women and 10 men. One man has slept with all ten women and no other man has slept with any woman, therefore each woman has slept with one man.
So average number of partners for a man is:
(10 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0)/10 = 1
Average partners for a woman is:
(1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 1)/10 = 1

It doesn't matter what the overall distribution is for each average, they must always be equal.

I think the people saying that this is just a difference in how men define sex are right. Women are quick to say that a certain person didn't count, while a lot of men will count that time they pushed up against a girl on a crowded subway. There's also that when surveyed by an actual person (even if they're not recording the name, just having a human voice do it) women are more likely to lower their number and men to raise it. When tests do a secret ballot or are hooked up to a lie-detector (which don't work btw, but have the psychological effect of convincing someone they shouldn't lie), the numbers move closer together and it's usually about 6.

Also, keep in mind that whenever you measure a 'lifetime' stat, you can only get it for people whose lifetimes are over. If most people are 77 when they die, then you're learning how many partners people born in the 30s had. If you're just surveying people at 30 and assuming most are married, then your number must always be low (because those surveyed can always have more partners, but their number definitely can't go down.)

This seems valid but how would it skew the statistics if you included the fact that some of some peoples sexual partners wont be included in the study? due to them being slept with while on holiday in another country or something and so unlikely to be caught in the survey.

so from your example it would be 1 guy sleeps with 10 women but of the ten women in the study he has only slept with eight of them. while the remaing 2 women havent slept with anyone.

So average number of partners for a man is:
(10 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0)/10 = 1
Average partners for a woman is:
(1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 0 + 0)/10 = 0.8


so you could get different numbers for each sex.
Although this is still massively oversimplified.

Also does anyone know if the survey included homosexual couples or just heterosexual ones?

 

[overninept5]

Hell. There have been weekends where I've had more than 8!

 

[ShannonH]

This seems valid but how would it skew the statistics if you included the fact that some of some peoples sexual partners wont be included in the study? due to them being slept with while on holiday in another country or something and so unlikely to be caught in the survey.

so from your example it would be 1 guy sleeps with 10 women but of the ten women in the study he has only slept with eight of them. while the remaing 2 women havent slept with anyone.

So average number of partners for a man is:
(10 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0 + 0)/10 = 1
Average partners for a woman is:
(1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 0 + 0)/10 = 0.8


so you could get different numbers for each sex.
Although this is still massively oversimplified.

Also does anyone know if the survey included homosexual couples or just heterosexual ones?

The study's for a large sample, so it should all even out. The average man would need to sleep with a ridiculously higher proportion of foreign women on vacation than women do to make one 8 and the other 3.
You are right that if they're not collecting their sample set properly that could cause this outcome. I bet if you surveyed the people at Comic-Con, you'd find the women there have had more sexual partners than the men, because the women there could be having sex with more men who aren't in that group.

Here's the lie detector study; interestingly enough, it turns out men don't inflate their number nearly as often as women bring theirs down:
Fake lie-detector reveals women's sex lies - 14 July 2003 - New Scientist

 

[Tully77]

The average man would need to sleep with a ridiculously higher proportion of foreign women on vacation than women do to make one 8 and the other 3.

No, because the average man sleeps with far more prostitutes than the average women. They called 1501 people and ended up w/ a women's average of 6 partners. If about 1/2 were women, the total of all the women sounds like what a prostitute can easily do herself.

 

[travis1985]

No, because the average man sleeps with far more prostitutes than the average women. They called 1501 people and ended up w/ a women's average of 6 partners. If about 1/2 were women, the total of all the women sounds like what a prostitute can easily do herself.

Most men don't regularly sleep with prostitutes. Including them in the survey wouldn't skew the data by much.

 

[Bob Ross]

Most men don't regularly sleep with prostitutes. Including them in the survey wouldn't skew the data by much.

I don't think ANY men regularly sleep with prostitutes

 

[insert_8]

. . . It seemed obvious to me then that a lot of the guys probably inflated their number . . .

I've seen comments like that in several professional, scientifically controlled studies. Teens in general - both guys and girls - tend to claim more sexual experience than they actually have. That's one reason you hear teen complaints such as, "Well, I'm 18 years old and I'm the ONLY virgin left in the school . . . ". In fact, that's not at all true, and a significant number of the non-virgins only did it on a dare, or because they thought it would make them more acceptable to say they have "done it".

 

[ShannonH]

Most men don't regularly sleep with prostitutes. Including them in the survey wouldn't skew the data by much.

Yep. Also, go back to the numbers: 3 vs 8. You realise that if we assume the average woman sleeps with almost no prostitutes, the average man would have to sleep with 5 prostitutes for every 3 non-pros he's with?
If not every man regularly sleeps with prostitutes (I certainly don't, and from the responses even most of the sex-driven guys on this board don't), that goes up to an insane amount. If we count 9 guys all sleeping with 3 girls each, the 10th would have to sleep with 50 different pros to get that number. If that's true, maybe the prostitutes need to offer a loyalty rewards program.

Please, don't reply to this saying "I know a guy who slept with a lot of pros therefore you're wrong." That's not how stat's work. You can't just throw anecdotes in wherever you want because it affirms what you already think is true. By and large, looking at the whole population (not just the people you're exposed to, but everyone) there's no way guys are sleeping with 5 prostitutes per every 3 non-prostitutes they're with. The numbers just don't support it.

Take a read on that lie-detector link I posted. The numbers come together to almost match exactly when the surveyed people think they'd be caught in a lie.

 

[hud01]

Yep. Also, go back to the numbers: 3 vs 8. You realise that if we assume the average woman sleeps with almost no prostitutes, the average man would have to sleep with 5 prostitutes for every 3 non-pros he's with?
If not every man regularly sleeps with prostitutes (I certainly don't, and from the responses even most of the sex-driven guys on this board don't), that goes up to an insane amount. If we count 9 guys all sleeping with 3 girls each, the 10th would have to sleep with 50 different pros to get that number. If that's true, maybe the prostitutes need to offer a loyalty rewards program.

Please, don't reply to this saying "I know a guy who slept with a lot of pros therefore you're wrong." That's not how stat's work. You can't just throw anecdotes in wherever you want because it affirms what you already think is true. By and large, looking at the whole population (not just the people you're exposed to, but everyone) there's no way guys are sleeping with 5 prostitutes per every 3 non-prostitutes they're with. The numbers just don't support it.

Take a read on that lie-detector link I posted. The numbers come together to almost match exactly when the surveyed people think they'd be caught in a lie.

First, the numbers are for the median, not the average. Second, overall 15% of men had paid, and 30% if over thirty, so that can skew the numbers. When you add in that 4 men reported 200, 3 300 and one 400 that really adds up. Personally, I would have thrown out the 300+ and 400 as not being reliable. Just those 8 men would have added over two to each man, assuming an equal number of men and women.

 

[B_Hickboy]

define having sex.

Men's definition; anything where skin was involved
Women's definition; Only the times where they felt true passion, all the times she performed oral sex don't count.

That's a generalization. Do you have any data to back it up?

 

[stockgroup14]

I do think these numbers are wrong..but do keep in mind there are a lot more ladies on Earth than men...

The averages would only have to equal if it was a 50/50 split population wise...but there's 51% women...which may not seem like much...but with 7 billion people in the world...that means Earth has 140 million more women on it

And on college campuses across the country (world?)...that jumps to 53% women..which is significant because that's probably where a good chunk of the new sexual partners come from..

So..in a case like that...8 and 3 as medians isn't that much of a stretch...And I definitely buy 3 as a median for women...

 

[durden]

Well the average is 20 and 6 respectively, but still seems a bit off.

When it comes down to it though, does it really matter? comparing to others is fun and all, but I'll take quality over quantity

 

[Frnkd213]

I know some women. Who more or less have slept with 30+. So I call bullshit.

Well if they are the ones that more likely would be called they're numbers would definetly tilt the results. Lol
In a way it may influence other women to go fuck someone tonight as they may not want to be less than average in their life time of fucks. Lol

 

[Phil Ayesho]

The numbers are probably accurate.
The higher numbers for men are what you would expect, and No, do not indicate a methodological flaw.

men are more promiscuous than women, as a baseline, but that does not mean that women can not be promiscuous.

It just means that fewer women are as promiscuous as men.

Women who marry young generally have fewer sexual partners than women who date until their late 20s or early thirties... however, because of men's higher rates of infidelity, early marriage for men has little effect on their lifetime average of sexual partners, as many men will be more than willing to cheat.


On the other side, very few men are EXTREMELY promiscuous, not out of lack of wanting to be, but simply out of lack of opportunity. The fact is MOST of us men are not the very model of masculine allure.
Men, in general, can try a lot, but get shot down way more often than they actually score.

The smaller number of promiscuous women, however, can pretty much get laid at any time they feel like it, if they are simply less choosy about the particulars.

Thus, despite the fact that far fewer women are out there flitting from partner to partner, their "average" can be far higher than the average promiscuous men.

In talking to men I know and the women ( only a few of whom are more sexually open and available) the guys, when pressed to honesty, almost always return a number between 6 and 12... with only one or two outliers.

The women, however, fall into two camps... one group claiming anywhere from 2 to 5, and another, much smaller group, that claim between 10 and 20.

This is not to suggest that some women 'sleep around' nor are More promiscuous or horny than men... this simply reflects that women get to do the deciding on when sex happens and with whom, and therefore, when they want sex they pretty much get it... whereas men do not generally get it anywhere near as often as they might want it.

If half of all women are of the sexually less available type, Marrying early and having kids and therefore less likely to be out dating... more likely to have only one or two affairs over their 20s and 30s... that very low number among half the population brings women's averages WAY down in any large scale study.

If the other half of the population of women are of the more sexually open variety... and they generally can get laid any time they choose, their greater success at hooking up than men generally can achieve will more than make up for the difference, and explain how men, in general, can have larger averages than women in general.

 

[ShannonH]

The averages would only have to equal if it was a 50/50 split population wise...but there's 51% women...which may not seem like much...but with 7 billion people in the world...that means Earth has 140 million more women on it

And on college campuses across the country (world?)...that jumps to 53% women..which is significant because that's probably where a good chunk of the new sexual partners come from..

So..in a case like that...8 and 3 as medians isn't that much of a stretch...And I definitely buy 3 as a median for women...

A 47% / 53% split wouldn't amount to one number being 2.7x higher than the other.

Okay, so the median is 3 to 8. The average is 6 to 20. The medians can vary, but the averages can't (at least not by anywhere near that much.) Therefore we know the data are bad. Therefore, any median taken from those data cannot be reliable. You can't extract reliable results from unreliable data, no matter how much you massage and interpret it. GIGO.

 

[MrHangman]

I guess men tend to exaggerate their number, meanwhile women try to minimalize it?

 

[Frnkd213]

I guess men tend to exaggerate their number, meanwhile women try to minimalize it?

That maybe be true. like dick size huh?