Advice for the ladies (or what guys do wrong on LPSG)

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by Daisy, Jan 30, 2011.

  1. Daisy

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    The following was posted by former member MadRouge who is no longer here, but it was a blog post. Most people probably havent seen it, and it had crazy html tags attached to it. The mods have cleaned it up and I thought it was worthy of a repost....


    This is in no way generalizing all men I've encountered here. I've had brilliant and wonderful conversations with men from LPSG. So to the good and gentlemanly men out there...if you get snubbed by a woman, its probably because she's experienced so many assholes and weirdos in such a short period of time that she won't give you a chance until you show you are higher up on the food chain.

    Ok ok, here ya go...

    1) Don't reply to stupid private messages, usually indicating how awesome you are, how much you are admired and would you "do them a favor" by rating their photos.

    2) Answering questions in Private Message such as: Wow, how big are those things? How big is your boyfriend? Would you like to fuck a cock like mine? Would my cock please your vagina? (Answering such questions generally lead to never ending circular conversations about their cock)

    3) Never get sucked in to the all important trick question of "Whats your ideal size?" because that really means "Is my cock big enough to please your vagina?" and you always have to answer this as "Yes" because you will fear some innocent guy turning into a bizarre stalker type if you say "No".... but strangely if you say "Yes" he gets some brilliant idea to start investigating more about you thus appearing stalkerish.

    4) SPHers. This stands for Small Penis Humiliation types. Yes they like to be insulted. But they tend to send 5 to 7 paragraph long dissertations on how small they are (usually ranging from 2.5 inches to 4 inches usually) (girth varies) and they act like they feel bad for being small but secretly LOVE it. So this one is tricky. Just ignore it.

    Oh and these guys always have one or more of the following adjectives in their screen name: Small, tiny, baby, little and sometimes the numbers 2, 3 or 4 inches.


    5) Guys who want your female opinion on encouraging their wife and/or girlfriend to have sex with another man (generally a larger cocked man) they truly want you to tell them its a great idea and you would secretly want to do this too. They tend to disregard most of what their actual spouse is telling them and want you to agree with them so they can watch their wife get fucked. Honestly, i think some of them just want to hold this against their wife later when she jumps on him for not taking out the trash.

    The best way to handle this type is to say- Nope sorry, i dont give advice to people about their relationships and who they should have sex with. I'm not about to be the deciding factor for something that important.

    6) Getting private messages from the guys who really just hate you. You usually don't get these until you've made a name for yourself on the forums. They actually love to hate you. You might actually get a few from gay guys. Sometimes they will be rebirthed after getting banned and get pleasure from "getting back at you" and it's kinda funny to read their shit actually.

    7) The guy pretending to be a female who wants to be your friend. This is usually obvious because men pick some of the most stripper/porn sounding names. Such as: TinaLuvsCock, LickmyPinkPussy, CreamyClarissa, LatinaLovesBigOlDick......you get the point.

    They often say something like "Oh im so glad i found another female on the site. hee hee. Do you like big throbbing cock in your wet pussy?"

    8) An insane number of guys who ask you "So what brings you here?"

    9) Guys who say weird shit they dont even know sounds weird- "Wow, i wish you were my mom...that'd be sooo hot"

    10) Guys who say "Lemme see those tits!" and when you say no, they retort with "How about that wet pussy then?" as if tits were so vulgar that your pussy was a lot less erotic to show them.

    11) Guys who fear pussy but constantly talk like they are getting laid. (Who all know who these guys are)

    12) Those who have no concept of how the vagina works. You are constantly having to explain how your vagina can withstand stretching, or not, how your vagina changed before and after birth. How the vagina doesnt blow out through your pelvic outlet when you sneeze really hard. And Asian pussies arent sideways slits.

    13) Guys who have unrealistic porn views on women. Note: All women should be shaved, not own a stretch mark, have beautiful feet, take big cock like a pro but also cry and wince in pain at the same time to make them feel manly. So don't feel bad when you are a human being and not a cyber robotic looking woman.

    14) Guys who secretly want to be women or naturally think like women. You will know these types because they tend to answer the most complex female questions and fight to the death in order to throw out any female answers that don't go along with theirs. Such as: What brand of tampon works the best? Does it hurt to use a diaphragm? What did it feel like to give birth? How old were you when you had your first orgasm?

    15) Woman haters. These are the guys who literally go around looking for any thread that could possibly indicate injustice towards men. They will transform any opinion or experience into a "YOU DESERVE IT YOU BITCH" or "WOMEN DO THAT TO MEN ALL THE TIME!!!" in order to justify all behaviors. They never seem to say anything other than "She started it!" for every situation. They tend to be like barnicles on the Coral Reef when it comes to laying around the Women's Forum looking for Plankton to feed on.

    16) Guys who are virgins and deep down on the inside prefer to stay that way. They want to live on both sides of the fence. They really really want to get some pussy and pick your brain on how to find it. They tend to masturbate all the time, put sex as the Holy Grail of all things to enjoy in life, live through others experiences. After all of that, they go through day to day situations where they could make a move with a woman but really don't want to lose their V-card. They embrace it. It's paradoxical. But then days later they are back to whining about it.

    17) Super Fake male personas. This is something i see more of where the females hang out. These guys walk around like Hercules, trying to stand head above all other men and impress the ladies by being complete and total asses. They start threads that usually have a subject line that indicates their many "issues" with women in general and their insecurities. They tend to have a gallery or avatar that looks comic book super heroish. They tend to talk a lot about Loose Pussy.

    18) Women who try really really hard to be contrary to every female response. They are working so hard as to not be labeled as "typical female" that they really sound more like a man with a female avatar. These are generally "too good to be true" types who 50% of the time turn out to be real and genuine women. But they usually follow people from thread to thread negating whatever they say as being totally false because they dont personally feel that way.

    Usually the men place these women on a high part of the totem pole because they fullfill the fantasy of having a football watching, big titted, perfect faced, blow job loving, sex fiend who loves anal sex and chugs more beers than you can while making an award winning chicken dinner with all the fixens and doesnt ovulate.

    19) Guys who send you the same messages roughly every 7 to 10 days (even if you responded to them) because they totally forgot who they sent the messages to. They tend to ask repetitive questions regarding your physical attributes or what you think of their cock (again) and you end up having to just ignore them. Note: It's weird to re-introduce yourself to the lady each week. She puts a red flag on your mental status.

    20) Last but not least: Men who ask questions that are really just to get them off. Such as "Ladies, how many times have you given oral sex? Please go into extreme detail on each account, how it made you feel, what was going through your head at the time and whether or not you eventually had sex with these men and if you had sex with them, did you enjoy it or did you think it was ok or just indifferent towards the whole event. Thanks!
     
  2. HiddenLacey

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    Yes I love this blog of hers, I think it should be a sticky for newbies. I've went through each of those and I remember the first time I read her blog I laughed because it was completely true.
     
    #2 HiddenLacey, Jan 30, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 30, 2011
  3. ronin001

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    Wise words from Madam R. gosh I do miss her
     
  4. MsThang

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    This is great. Wish I read this when I first joined but better late than never.
     
  5. Drifterwood

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    She had great tits as well.
     
  6. B_subgirrl

    B_subgirrl New Member

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    I think new straight males should get sent a PM automatically that tells them what not to do.

    eg. Don't send PMs to women you haven't met before asking them to check out your cock unless you WANT to be ignored.
     
  7. RawDog

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    Ironically, this thread does need to be a sticky as submissivegirl83 said.
     
  8. Daisy

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    I don't think it's ironic in the least
     
  9. RawDog

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    Ironic because Mademoiselle Rouge is banned now.
     
  10. Daisy

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    LOL!! OK that part may be ironic.
     
  11. mexdude

    mexdude New Member

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    Really??ยก
    :lmao:
     
  12. D_Rosalind Mussell

    D_Rosalind Mussell New Member

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    Brilliant post by MR. I miss her!
     
  13. LaFemme

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    6) Getting private messages from the guys who really just hate you. You usually don't get these until you've made a name for yourself on the forums. They actually love to hate you. You might actually get a few from gay guys. Sometimes they will be rebirthed after getting banned and get pleasure from "getting back at you" and it's kinda funny to read their shit actually.

    Wow.. this just happened to me. Apparently my assets don't meet to the standards this guy has set out for women! Now I don't feel so bad! It's a compliment to think that maybe I'm not as invisible as I thought I was! lol

    This should definitely be a sticky...
     
  14. curious_angel

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    Is there an equivalent thread: 'What ladies do wrong on LPSG'?
     
  15. Daisy

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    Interesting. Maybe someone should start one
     
  16. D_Rosalind Mussell

    D_Rosalind Mussell New Member

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    I second this.
     
  17. PerfectlySexy

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    Yeah but she would never tell me what brought her here...



    But seriously I also agree this is worth being a sticky. I can see a lot of benefits to the community.
     
  18. HappyBoi

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    I think even the best of people fail one or another of these at one time or another, even if you don't do it that often - but to never do anything of these, or never ask any of those questions (even if they're in a more innocent tone and not so blunt) - I don't think there's a lot of people that would make the cut. :p High standards! :tongue:

    Sure, there's a lot of them that's really weird, but I can even admit to have asked the question 'how big are you?' - but to a guy then, I'm pretty gay.. :biggrin1: I only do it if they've asked me before though.. :tongue:


    The number 6: :frown1:... BUT, if the hate is towards you as a person (and I don't mean you as in you Seaside, but just you as in the person who recieves these), I can't see the connection between that hate and the haters sexual orientation that I feel this statement tries to show. 'Hate', based from the way this statement describe it, seems more like hate from an individual to another. Just a thought. :p And no, I don't try to claim you being totally wrong like one of those other statements said.. ;p

    The number 9: Euuuuw!? Euuuuw! EUUUUUUW! :frown1:
     
  19. nicenycdick

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    The Ladies can do no wrong.

    MR apparently forgot to include this one:

    Men who agree with everything the women say and support the female perspective at every turn, all in order to endear themselves to the female LPSG population in hopes of having them rate their cock.

    Ladies, please let me know if this works...
     
  20. Daisy

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    Happy, I think Mad. Rouge was probably biased in that she had VERY strong opinions on things that put some people off. I think she had a few run ins with gay guys and was probably a little biased in that direction.
     
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