Advice you'd give to an 18 year old.

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by D_Amadeus_Mofart, Jun 11, 2011.

  1. D_Amadeus_Mofart

    D_Amadeus_Mofart Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2011
    Messages:
    472
    Likes Received:
    5
    So I'm one of the youngest members on here, I'm an 18 years old student studying Health Science.

    Obviously there's a lot of wiser guys here then me, so I'm wondering.. what advice would you give to an 18 year old about life.

    I mean real advice, not the typical "stay in school, don't do drugs" speech. Real advice, something honest true, and atypical.

    Look forward to hearing what you guys have to say.

    Tyler
     
  2. nudeyorker

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2006
    Messages:
    42,918
    Likes Received:
    37
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    NYC/Honolulu
    Unfortunately my advice might sound trite but for whatever it's worth... Don't worry about what other people think about you (as long as what you are doing is legal) and go ahead and make mistakes but learn from them and take life for a joy ride because there is no going back for a redo.
    And take good care of your teeth and wear sunscreen.
     
  3. lucidbass

    lucidbass New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2010
    Messages:
    288
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    People try to turn 'maturing' into something rigid and defined. Like the way they changed is synonymous with 'maturing'. But, we all have different starting positions and different finish lines, taking different trips. Two people can start on two opposite positions, grow older, learn and end up on each other's previous position and attribute it to 'maturing'. It's such an egoistical and arrogant view.

    I'm not much 'older' than you are and I think it takes a lot more than just age to be wise, so I may not be the person you want an answer from. But don't worry about the destination and get the most experience you can out of your travels.
     
  4. CUBE

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 28, 2005
    Messages:
    7,331
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    1,177
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    The OC
    Try to stay out of debt.
    Travel when you can because it makes you smarter.
    It is good to love and be loved back
    Most jobs are desk jobs...so find one that makes money...because security does lead to happiness.
     
  5. chicagosam

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 16, 2006
    Messages:
    15,030
    Likes Received:
    761
    Surround yourself with people who have your best interests at heart and can mentor you in the best possible way. Make sure that they always feel important and appreciated by you.

    Feel free to make mistakes as long as you can learn and grow from them.

    Never think that you know everything. That is usually when life will remind you in the worst possible way that you know nothing.

    Appreciate everything that you have no matter how much or little.

    Be kind. You may need that kindness returned to you someday.

    Have a great life, Tyler. I suspect you will do very well.
     
  6. B_Homosexual

    B_Homosexual New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 2, 2011
    Messages:
    10
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Billingsgate Shoal
    Tyler,

    Whatever it is, live your own truth and follow your own instincts rather than that of the crowd. Eighteen is a tender age and you have so much before you. There will be the expected bumps along the way but if you pay strict attention you'll find that you'll learn easily and quickly how to treat others. I write in vast generality but I don't know you so the only advice I can offer is general. But you were canny enough to pose the question so I suspect you'll understand my meaning.

    In due time (and with some good choices on your part) others may learn from your example.
     
  7. Endued

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 13, 2009
    Messages:
    1,987
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    15
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    UKulele
    Verified:
    Photo
    Don't run with scissors.
     
  8. LookingCurious

    LookingCurious New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 9, 2010
    Messages:
    235
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    6
    Gender:
    Male
    I completely agree. I wasted too much of my life caring what other people thought about me. Its still something I struggle with now.

    Agreed.

    I have a scar on my upper thigh that would bear witness to how important this is.....
     
  9. D_Tim McGnaw

    D_Tim McGnaw Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2009
    Messages:
    7,317
    Likes Received:
    8
    My advice- "Shut up" "enjoy looking pretty, you'll look old long enough" "Get laid if you can, if you can't don't worry you'll get laid when you're older instead" "You don't know everything, in fact as you get older you'll realise you know less and less"
     
  10. nudeyorker

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2006
    Messages:
    42,918
    Likes Received:
    37
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    NYC/Honolulu
    My mother was very concerned about appearances... but my father said "Don't worry about what anyone else thinks about you unless they are paying your bills."
    It stuck with me!
     
  11. B_Hickboy

    B_Hickboy New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2005
    Messages:
    10,730
    Likes Received:
    5
    Location:
    That twinge in your intestines
    Wear sunscreen.
    Use barrier protection when you have sex, unless it's with a long term partner and you've both been test.
    Find something you love to do, and do that for a living. The money will come.
    Be prepared to wait for the money to come, because sometimes it doesn't come right away.
    Branch out - if something interests you, pursue it as a hobby. Who knows, it may replace you day job.
    Stop playing those fucking video games.
    Never believe what others say about you. Instead, try to now yourself well enough that their opinions won't matter.
    Ask for help when you need it.

    I dunno, I told my kids a lot of shit. Some of it they ignored completely, some of it they've followed and it's helped them. I managed not to lead them astray, I think.
     
  12. B_Hickboy

    B_Hickboy New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2005
    Messages:
    10,730
    Likes Received:
    5
    Location:
    That twinge in your intestines
    Also: Reveal yourself. If you're not true to yourself and others about who you are, people will invent you.
     
  13. canuck_pa

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 28, 2007
    Messages:
    2,196
    Likes Received:
    124
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Beautiful Vancouver Canada
    Be true to yourself and make yourself proud. Live to your own expectations not some one else's.
     
  14. b.c.

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 7, 2005
    Messages:
    9,278
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    1,678
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    at home
    1) NEVER ever get a "guaranteed" student loan. The only thing guaranteed is that you'll be paying on it for fuckin' LIFE.

    2) Tell the older people who matter to you that you love them, while you can. If you have kids, treasure every moment they're young. Tomorrow they won't be.

    3) Savor even the "little moments", remember them always. They'll only happen once.

    4) Start saving some money NOW.

    5) Last but certainly not least: GO for it!!
     
  15. earllogjam

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 15, 2006
    Messages:
    5,027
    Likes Received:
    21
    You need money to live. Start being independent as soon as you're able. Self reliance. Can't grow as a person living off mom and dad. Move out as soon as you can and spread your wings.

    If you really aren't book smart, talented and completely average mentally and/or lazy, think of joining the military or enlist in a government job like a fireman or cop and retire in 20 years at 38 with a fat pension for the rest or your life.

    Remember money doesn't buy happiness but it does give you freedom to choose a lifestyle which can lead to happiness more readily than being dirt poor and starving.

    Zen Meditation and Yoga for mental clarity and health.

    Brush and floss your teeth and don't skip teeth cleanings.

    Cultivate friendships now. It's easier making deep meaningful lifelong friendships now than when you get older. It's almost impossible when you're over 40.

    Have lots and lots of great sex.
     
  16. Krusader

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Dec 15, 2007
    Messages:
    5,459
    Albums:
    3
    Likes Received:
    2,930
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Mos Eisley
    Study Hard
     
  17. rawbone8

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2004
    Messages:
    2,864
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    4
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Toronto (ON, CA)
    Porn is both fiction, and propaganda. Forget what you think you learned there. Start over.
     
  18. Viking_UK

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 17, 2007
    Messages:
    1,245
    Likes Received:
    6
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Scotland
    Stay friends with people who will tell you what you don't want to hear.
    Don't get into debt.
    Have lots of safe sex.
    Wear plenty of sunscreen and drink enough water.
    Don't stuff your face with more calories than you burn off.
    Be honest, but bear in mind that how you say something is often as imporant as what you say.
    Remember that most people have a hidden agenda, and that their aims might not always be the same as yours and will not necessarily be to your benefit (especially if they're a journalist, politician, lawyer etc.)
    Try not to do anything you wouldn't want your granny to hear about on the national news.
    Never say anything about someone behind their back that you wouldn't say to their face.
    There are always at least three sides to every story: yours, theirs and the truth, so try not to jump to conclusions.
    Treat others with the same respect as you'd like them to show you.
    Talking quietly and rationally is more likely to change someone's mind than shouting at them.
     
  19. duderino

    duderino New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2006
    Messages:
    590
    Likes Received:
    3
    Viking - one point, then may I elaborate a bit...

    Journalists - true journalists - report fact. That is our job. There is no hidden agenda. Simply to report the who, what, where, when and why as accurately as possible. What is on TV is not journalism. That's political punditry on a set dressed to look like news.

    I'm somewhat offended by your remark. I take extreme care to make sure my subject understands that he is speaking on the record, and if we go off the record or on deep background, that is just that: OFF THE RECORD. Look at the Valerie Plame case to see the degree to which we defend our right to accurately report the news double- and triple-sourcing anything unattributed, or attributed to an anonymous source "close to the [fill in the blank]"

    Sure, journalism is not a perfect science. People do make mistakes, and retractions are issued. Reporters who often get caught up in the story or enter into an assignment with a pre-concieved angle are not practicing the science of journalism. They are simply acting as pundits for their own bias.

    That said, your first bit does make a good deal of sense. However it's important to remember that, in the position of the person who says "wear sunscreen," we must refrain from becoming upset when our advisee returns home looking like a lobster. No amount of foot stomping will make somebody do something. Only those who've learned to control the minds of others can do that; otherwise our choices are our own, and the consequences are our own to bear. Blaming others simply leads to self-delusion. Take care of yourself, and be an example for others. As for mind control, I've yet to read anything in the journals about that working out too well.

    Otherwise, I agree with most of what you're saying. Yes-men are only good for those who wish to reinforce their own delusions, and shouting simply wounds.

    I would add something: Refrain from passing judgement on others, lest ye be judged. You are far more likely to be the person called in a crisis - and be the person to genuinely help - if you're able to accept the basic human faults in our bretheren; harping on past mistakes never helps. Suggesting a solution to minimize consequences of a mistake almost always helps. Especially if these suggestions are framed from one's own experience, and not simply dolled out as a "do this, do that." At least that's how I've found things to work in my experience.

    Be true to thine self, and honesty and trust will come naturally.

    It's only a problem if you have a solution.

    Work on yourself, and the rest will follow.

    (Three sides to the story is fantastic; we are prisoners to our own flawed perceptions and our inbred inability to easily judge conflict from the eyes of our advisory. Never go into battle without accurately assessing the motives of your enemy from the perspective of your enemy. We naturally bury our own mistakes and anxieties, leading to weaknesses others may exploit. But it is we who bury our anxieties, and it is only through total, honest self-introspection that we may gain enlightenment. With that, comes the realization that fighting is, by and large, a total waste of time and energy.)

    To quote Blake: I was angry with my friend; I told my wrath, my wrath did end. I was angry with my foe; I told it not, my wrath did grow.

    Here here on the penultimate concept:

    Do unto others as we would like done unto ourselves.

    Be a good neighbor. Because sometimes the girl next door is a total hottie.
     
  20. Catchoftheday

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 11, 2007
    Messages:
    18,300
    Likes Received:
    127
    Location:
    On the other side
    Stay on drugs don't do school :tongue:
     
Draft saved Draft deleted