Age Difference Question

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by LeftHookBrutal, Feb 16, 2011.

  1. LeftHookBrutal

    LeftHookBrutal New Member

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    I am a student who has been studying at the same place for a while now, but the new year has seen the arrival of some new students. One in particular has caught my eye. She studies down the hall and begins and ends her class at the same time I start and end mine.

    The potential problem is her age. I'd have her pegged as a girl in her late teens, or possibly 20 or 21. It's hard to say of course as looks can decieve sometimes.

    I am 29 now. So there is a large age gap. Do you think it rules out any chance of a relationship?
     
  2. B_subgirrl

    B_subgirrl New Member

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    I started fucking one of my FBs when he was 28 and I was 20, and started a LTR with another guy when I was 21 and he was 29. The age gap never caused any problems, nor did it bother me or my partners. I have to admit though, it did bother my mum until she met each of the guys.
     
  3. EllieP

    Staff Member Moderator Gold Member

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    Age is a state of mind. She could be a very immature 21 year old or a very mature 17 year old. My husband is 8 years older than me, and while there's a "gap" of sorts, it makes life interesting to have the differing viewpoints and frames of reference.

    What have you got to lose? What has she got gain?
     
  4. TDurden1979

    TDurden1979 Member

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    Biggest age difference I've had is 9 years my junior(31 to 22) and 13 years my senior(29 to 42). Neither were an issue, so I don't think you'll have a problem either. Provided she's okay with it and maturity levels are similar you two shouldn't run into any bumps agewise.
     
  5. EmJay

    EmJay New Member

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    Relationship wise 10 years younger is as far as i can allow myself to go mentally..and really no more than 5 my senior. I prefer younger though..
     
  6. B_subgirrl

    B_subgirrl New Member

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    Oh gosh, I really can't do younger (except maybe for Jonesy :tongue:). I like my guys my age or older. Preferably older.
     
  7. EmJay

    EmJay New Member

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    I meant younger than me but older than 27..hahahaha (just to clarify).

    But I might be better of if I would date older men...don't know..
     
  8. Icarium

    Icarium New Member

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    I dated a few older women when i was younger and there was no problems then but for the past few years i've been dating younger women. My current gf is 16 years younger than me but she reckons that it feels as though i'm her age. She says i don't look or act my age (most men don't lol) and i'm the best bf she's ever had.

    Even though i'm older i don't preach to her about things and i remember when i was her age what i was like. I give her autonomy and allow her to make mistakes (best way to learn eh). Most importantly i treat her as my equal and she likes that. Also what is appealing is that we are from different eras so i have fun telling her about things from my youth and she keeps me up to date on cerain things (although i don't let on that i already know lol).

    Like any relationship if you make something a barrier and worry about the differences it will cause problems, look at the positives and go from there
     
  9. _Jonesy

    _Jonesy Member

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    LOL, I think that would be a hard chance to pass up on.

    I'll give you some advice OP, do not let it stop you. I did, I was 18 she was 15 and the same as my brother and it caused a huge debate in my morals and in the end I chose against it, that and because of another girl but that is another story.

    Looking back, I missed out. She was everything I had ever wanted up to that point, and I ruined it.

    If you are serious about this girl, you have my thumbs up. Besides, post-20 it isn't so bad. My Dad is 8 years my mothers junior.

    Right now, I want a casual 'relationship' if you can call it that with someone my senior. Quite badly actually. Cannot imagine how it would happen though.
     
  10. borntobeking

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    LeftHookBrutal, I think that age difference is perfectly acceptable. You're both adults so it's all good.

    For myself I have always preferred older women. When I was 19 I dated a woman that was 30. Heck even now my wife is 2 years older than me (not that big of a difference). I would not date anyone 5 years younger than me. My little sister is 5 years younger than me and since she was always the baby of the family, anyone younger than her just comes across as a kid to me.
     
  11. petite

    petite New Member

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    I think you shouldn't pre-judge her and you should discover for yourself if she's mature enough or not. It's possible that she's extremely mature. My cousin married a woman who is 14 years younger than him when she was 22, and he confided in me at the time that she's so much more mature than he is and that he deeply admires her for all of her strengths, like her strong work ethic, her organizational skills, her ability to budget and save money, her dedication to earning her degree and paying for it herself, and her understanding of how to handle things like building her credit and insurance, which go over my cousin's head! That woman could also be extremely immature. You never know until you get to know her.

    When I was 21 I really gave up on men my age and mainly dated men around who were 28-32. I don't think I was too young for them at all. Different people mature at different rates, and some people never grow up, as I discovered, and am continuing to discover every day. It was shocking to me to date a man who was 28 who behaved more immaturely than the 19 year old I dated just a few months earlier. I learned that age was no guarantee of maturity. I ended up in a ltr with a man almost 10 years older than me, but he never treated me like I wasn't his equal.

    There were problems with dating older men, for me. I hated it whenever an older man treated me like I was a lot younger than I was, especially when it seemed to be without good cause, that was condescending. Some guys seemed to want to play the "daddy" in the relationship, telling me what to do, and that bothered me a lot. I didn't like it. They obviously had a different idea of what kind of relationship we would have.
     
  12. Enid

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    i'm 40 and i'm involved with someone 14 years younger. it can work!
     
  13. D_Barney_the_Bare

    D_Barney_the_Bare Account Disabled

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    and im 25 and jealous
     
  14. LeftHookBrutal

    LeftHookBrutal New Member

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    thanx everyone:smile:
     
  15. EmJay

    EmJay New Member

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    I have a friend that has just gotten married to a 26 year old woman. He is 51 years old..He looks about 40 though..

    he said..that atleast he wont have to wipe her ass when she get's older ;-)
     
  16. silvertriumph2

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    I agree with
    EllieP....Age is a state of mind.
    So take a chance....go for it.....

    I would never let age get in the way...and haven't. Some of the best relationships I have had have been older than me.....when I was younger..:biggrin:
    That said......I have to say...Underage...Never!
     
  17. hung15us

    hung15us Member

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    I dated a gal that was 30 younger than me for 8 morths and we got married and that was 25 years ago. She is a great woman. She was younger than my youngest kid by 2 years.
     
  18. yoursgetsmine

    yoursgetsmine Member

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    Age is a relative issue. It is affected by the mental state of an individual as well as the physical attributes. If you're looking for a physical relationship, and strictly sexual in nature, as long as each person is of a legal age, no age difference is a barrier as long as there is an attraction and mutual acceptance/approval of each individual. However, if one of the two partners has a significant age difference, especially if the oldest of the two is 25 plus years older, the age difference could be a major problem when the oldest is in their 60's-70's and the younger partner is still very active sexually and physically and the older of the two slows down.

    Of course there are always exceptions to everything, and some younger people act much older in than their chronological age, and some older people act much younger than their actual age. I always live by the my own personal code when I'm with a much younger girl....and the topic of my age comes up. I simply say "There are only two things you need to know...."You're old enough, and I'm young enough" and as long as you can satisfy the needs of the other person, whatever those needs may be, then it's doable...at least in the short term.
     
  19. jadnash

    jadnash Member

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    I am a bi-male. I have had an ongoing relationship for the last 10 years with a guy who is 21 years younger than me. I dont look my age, he is bi also, a very goodlooking guy who gets so more pussy than any guy i know. No one knows about our relationship, just a good friendship between two guys. He is planning on getting engaged, i told him that we would have to stop having sex but eveything else would be the same. He agrees.
     
  20. Stephenmass

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    Everytime I look at your pics Jonesy...damn ur cute as hell!



     
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