Age Difference

[_avg_]

10 up, 5 down....that seems to be the consensus from others I've asked. For the most part, they've said that age is not terribly important -- that any two people can find love together -- but that they would not consider dating someone 10 years their senior and that 5 years younger is too young.

Let's be fair, there's also a social component -- an 18yo dating a 33yo is not highly regarded and may not meet with the families'/communities' approval...

So just how important is age difference in a relationship?
What range are you comfortable with?
What is 'acceptable' to you?

 

[B_VinylBoy]

I've always been in interracial, intergenerational relationships.
My first was when I was 23. My partner at the time was 34. That lasted for 3 years.
My second was when I was 27. My partner was 44. That lasted for 5 years.
My current started when I was 32. My partner was 56. 5 years and counting.

Age doesn't phase me in the least. I don't use that benchmark as a stipulation as to who I decide to love. And naturally I'm attracted to those who are older to me. There have been plenty of people "my age" that I've either been attracted to or had sex with. But we wind up being more like friends than actual lovers.

Although I'm sure other people look at me and think I'm just after a "daddy chaser".

 

[IntoxicatingToxin]

If he's old enough to be my dad or young enough to be my son, then it's probably not going to happen. My most recent boyfriend is 18 years old. Or well, he's 19 now, he was 18 when we dated. That's a 9 year age difference. Before him, when I was 25, I was dating a 39 year old. It's all about how we get along mentally and emotionally for me.

 

[Enid]

i date someone who is 14 years my junior.

i have no problem with age differences, it's the person/maturity level that counts.

 

[ScorpioSlut]

I personally don't have an "age range"...Though I will admit I probably wouldn't consider someone old enough to be my father or someone young enough to be my child.....but not saying that is set in stone. I would certainly consider it if the situation was right. The largest age difference was a 38 year old when I was 18 so 20 years.....the smallest age difference was literally 30 days apart.

Of those relationships the majority of them were older...that is simply what I prefer. I am easily annoyed by people who act too childish so that is probably why I stay away from the younger folks.....though not all of them are immature and childish.....just never met one I've been compatable with.

 

[voyeuristic]

I'm almost 34; my boyfriend turns 26 soon. He's the most emotionally mature man I've ever been involved with; in fact, he's more emotionally mature/grounded than I am. We've only been dating for seven months, but I would happily have this guy's kid.

Before him, I lived with a woman who was 9 years younger than me for over 5 years. We got together when she was 17 and I was 26. She still had a lot of emotional issues to work out at that age, obviously, but intellectually she could best people thirty years her senior.

I tend to be attracted to younger people, but the right person can sway me. I've had two really huge crushes on men in their late thirties and early forties fairly recently. One thing I'll admit is a turn-off about aging is male pattern baldness...my guy's hair has already started thinning a bit at his tender age, but I'm so in love with him that the idea of staying with him long enough to watch it all fall out doesn't bother me in the least. That said, when I do notice guys in their forties and beyond, they're usually the ones with a full head of silver hair.

 

[Explorer]

I'm 37 and my bf is 19, so that's an 18yr difference and we've been together for over 14 months and counting. We have no problem with the age issue, he's very mature acting and I can be childish, lol... We pretty much like the same things and we're both open to experimenting with what we don't have in common. The only funny thing is I refer to him as 'daddy' and he calls me 'my baby', LOL...

 

[DiscoBoy]

Does not phase me in the least.

 

[D_Tina_Ciao]

I tend toward younger men - first husband was a year younger; second was 8 years younger, but younger men who are as young as my children are like a red flag, and I just purely can't stand being with men who are "old", (look and act it and have an old attitude) even if they're younger than I am (and I've met a lot of guys 10-20 years younger than me who look and act 10-20 years older than I do).

All a moot point anyway - I'm still in love with my first love..........

 

[rob_just_rob]

About 10 years either way were the biggest differences.

 

[D_MisterBater]

five years from my age, either way

 

[rob_]

I don't think a relationship will work out if there is a limit on the age range. I think you're better off sticking to people your own age if a persons birthday defines whether or not you will date them.

Suppose I set a range of 3 years up, 3 years down and met a guy I really liked who was 4 years older than myself.

The only reason age is ever an issue is because people are afraid to break the boundaries society sets on us.

 

[Dave NoCal]

My husband is twenty-two years my junior. We've been together almost eleven years and took advantage of the California window of opportunity and got married last November 1st.

 

[Torque8]

Age range doesn't matter to me. I love COUGARS!!! Probably a reflection of the fact that when I was 17, I had a 3 month summer affair with a woman twice my age. Now that I'm in my early 30's, I'd love to meet up with a well built Cougar again in the event that my current relationship doesn't last.

 

[lickme69]

I do not like to set age range because you cannot judge people by their age. I have met younger people that act more mature than someone who is older than them. Personally, I have noticed that I have always been with older men. Not to big of a range, but always definitely older. Maybe 4-5 years older. Now that I am getting older and recently divorced, I could see myself with a younger man, but not anywhere near the age of my son.

 

[Mustang86]

Im 22 and my husband as of April, is 34, it doesnt bother us, and it doesn't seem to bother any of our friends and family either

 

[mako shark]

For a serious relationship age is a consideration, I wouldn't bring anyone around that was close to my daughters age...

 

[MagicJohnsonFan]

My fiance (since July 25!) is 12 years younger than I am. I've usually dated men 5-15 years older than me and never gave much thought to younger guys until him but this is the most wonderful relationship of my life. The only time I'm ever reminded of an age difference is when a song or movie comes on and we talk about how old we were when we first heard/watched it. Age is meaningless - it's maturity and compatibility that count.

 

[crazytmo]

I prefer younger men for some reason, I seem to get along better with them. However I am open for anything and don't think age matters in most cases.

 

[Phil Ayesho]

The standard rule of thumb for men dating/marrying women is that you can credibly date a woman as young as half your age- averaged up- plus seven years.


a 19 year old can credibly date a 17 year old, but no younger.
A 50 year old can get away with a 32 year old, but no younger.
and a 70 year old has to keep it above 42 or it looks really unseemly.

This rule works in reverse, as in any woman can subtract 7 from her age and double the number to find the oldest guy she ought to be seen romantically with.

I don't know of any rule of thumb for women dating younger men or they dating older women...