Am I Bi?

[Lovetobetouched]

If you can have that discussion with her, great. But most won’t take it well. They assume you are “Gay” - and you can wreck a marriage that has long term history and comfort and family. Also. Grass on the other side of the fence isn’t always greener

 

[bamamuscle_car76]

39 and married. I have never been with a guy but jerkoff to straight, bi, and gay porn. So what’s my deal? I don’t know. I consider myself bi because I enjoy sex with my wife but have a desire to jerkoff with another guy and maybe give head but I think that is as far as I would go. I have always kept this to myself. What are your thoughts?

I think you are experiencing what 98% of men do here. Don’t be tough on yourself. I love being with a woman, but at times I’d like a little sporadic change. You keep doing you.

 

[JJustin.1741]

Is your wife aware that you're bi, and have experiences with men?

No to both

 

[JF65]

I have considered this question too. You are definitely NOT alone or unique.

I enjoy all kinds of erotica; somtimes this, sometimes that. Among my preferences is “Big Cock” porn; solo scenes, frot, gloryhole porn, etc. I like the hypno, “you wish you were that girl sucking that dick” porn (mostly cuz they usually feature nice dicks, ..... I have come to really appreciate and be fascinated by good looking, big dicks.

But, I have thought about the “bi” thing and I think there is a spectrum within that ..... label? .... too. For example, when I am out and about, in a crowd, going about my life, I never look at men and regard them as “attractive” or not. I don’t think of them as potential sexual partners. I don’t even crotch-watch, DESPITE my appreciation of a naked (and I DO mean shaved!) dick.

The kicker for me is, as has been said, I’ve never had a male sexual experience so, for these reasons, I do not consider myself “bi”. But I envy those who have embraced it and make it work. I do believe if I had the opportunity and access to men who appealed to me sexually, I would definitely be “bi“ ....... often! But even then I’d undoubtedly remain closeted.

This is where I am at as well. Never really look at men like I do woman in public, especially people I know. Seems weird to think of men I know that way. Not with women. Now, in a gym locker room with people I don't know, especially in a shower, yes, I'm looking. I'll add in that I'm married, and have no intention of having sex outside of marriage. No judgement on anyone, I just wouldn't risk it for many reasons. I've never let my feeling show, but I think I my wife has suspicions as we've experimented with prostate massagers, etc.

This doesn't feel like something I "have" to do. It's a impulse I feel. I'll usually find erotica and have a go at that, and then it's out of my head for the moment. It used to be stronger (the impulse), but I've not acted on it. I've thought about it and looked at sites, but never seems worth the risk.

I've never thought of myself as bi, maybe curious. I believe all humans have a degree of bisexuality, even the straightest out there. That's why I've joined here as it lets me explore that side of things. I've never been able to talk to people about it. Not sure my wife would understand, or if there would be a need to, as it would put thoughts in her head of me cheating.

 

[deleted8788711]

I don't know. Sometimes I feel that way, too. I get turned on by sexualized images of men, and am curious, but have never and probably would never choose to have sex with a man.

 

[Partsguy_1969]

39 and married. I have never been with a guy but jerkoff to straight, bi, and gay porn. So what’s my deal? I don’t know. I consider myself bi because I enjoy sex with my wife but have a desire to jerkoff with another guy and maybe give head but I think that is as far as I would go. I have always kept this to myself. What are your thoughts?

I started my bisexual fantasies in my early 40’s. I struggle too as sex with my wife was great. Eventually I had to experience my fantasy and have not looked back. I enjoy my bisexuality. Explore, it is the only way to be sure.

 

[JJustin.1741]

Thank you JF65. I have the same type of position. I am married and I am committed to that, that being the primary reason I do not want to cheat. I check out guys and women while out and watch both gay and straight porn and have both sets of

I started my bisexual fantasies in my early 40’s. I struggle too as sex with my wife was great. Eventually I had to experience my fantasy and have not looked back. I enjoy my bisexuality. Explore, it is the only way to be sure.

hi Partsguy_1969, care to elaborate? How did your experience start?

 

[JJustin.1741]

There are two competing feeling I am working through. One, I am married, happy, and committed so random hooking up is not gonna happen. Two, I have an intense desire to experience another dick, not to have with sex, but to touch, jerkoff and suckoff.

 

[Lovetobetouched]

So y

There are two competing feeling I am working through. One, I am married, happy, and committed so random hooking up is not gonna happen. Two, I have an intense desire to experience another dick, not to have with sex, but to touch, jerkoff and suckoff.

So you need to find a trusted wank-bud who can allow you that experience. The feeling won’t go away but you may find the reality is not as great as the anticipation.

 

[JJustin.1741]

So y

So you need to find a trusted wank-bud who can allow you that experience. The feeling won’t go away but you may find the reality is not as great as the anticipation.

This does make the best sense. Maybe this will happen.

 

[TheMadKing316]

I’m in the same situation except I’m not happy in my marriage. Haven’t had sex with my wife in over a year. So I don’t feel too guilty about wanting to experience something for myself. I’m curious about a first time experience with a friend. Just to hangout, jerk together and experience some male bonding. I don’t have a desire to have full on sex. Especially for safety reasons. But touching is cool. Not even sure if I just want it to be a one time situation or not. But would be nice to have a male friend to bond with while I figure out whats next in my life.

 

[JJustin.1741]

I’m in the same situation except I’m not happy in my marriage. Haven’t had sex with my wife in over a year. So I don’t feel too guilty about wanting to experience something for myself. I’m curious about a first time experience with a friend. Just to hangout, jerk together and experience some male bonding. I don’t have a desire to have full on sex. Especially for safety reasons. But touching is cool. Not even sure if I just want it to be a one time situation or not. But would be nice to have a male friend to bond with while I figure out whats next in my life.

Sucks for that bad marriage situation. I hope you find what you are looking for.

 

[TheMadKing316]

Sucks for that bad marriage situation. I hope you find what you are looking for.

Thanks man I appreciate that. I hope you find the right solution for yourself too. Not a good feeling when you feel stuck.

 

[Lovetobetouched]

Thanks man I appreciate that. I hope you find the right solution for yourself too. Not a good feeling when you feel stuck.

I’ve been in much the same situation with my wife. She seems to be in denial that there’s a problem. She is not the reason I am Bi but she deffs creates a situation where my Bi tendencies seem to be the easiest way out of being stuck in a sexless marriage. It’s just easier to cheat with a man as there are fewer hangups. Non of the relationship complexities there would be if I cheated with a woman. Men are much more practical. Sex and then carry on the conversation, cum - do you want another beer? Love that. Men are less complex and more predictable.

 

[bi2]

I think you are experiencing what 98% of men do here. Don’t be tough on yourself. I love being with a woman, but at times I’d like a little sporadic change. You keep doing you.

Good post and great advice.

Absolutely he should be kind to himself. I love being with a woman and all the pleasures that come from it, be it physically, emotionally and mentally.

However at times, I enjoy having a dick up my arse from my fuckbuddy. I get it about once a month and its an enjoyable carnal experience that I have with him.

Nothing wrong wtih being bi, gay or straight. Dont worry about labels, as at times you will flow to feeling one way compared to another.